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View Full Version : Favorite Ren and Stimpy quotes


EvilGhandi
09-08-2001, 02:22 AM
Stimpy you EEEEdiot.

Rens Peter Laurie voice still cracks me up in re-runs.

But my all time favorite has to be,
"The presidents head is full of carmal corn"

Kamino Neko
09-08-2001, 02:51 AM
No, Sir. Don't like it.

I use that one at every appropriate opportunity.

lawoot
09-08-2001, 03:15 AM
Everyone Loves Log!

Cisco
09-08-2001, 03:19 AM
My all time favorite that I saw once a very very long time ago and I still recite with reckless abandon...

"I'm gonna hit you
And you're gonna fall
And I'm gonna look down
And I'm gonna laugh
But first...

I gotta take a whiz!~"

teela brown
09-08-2001, 07:57 AM
I like thees song. It helps me to *RELAX*!!!!!

Ukulele Ike
09-08-2001, 08:40 AM
Not actually a quote. Just the label on one of the food tubes in the Space one.

Braised Giblets.



Hey Dad, what's for dinner? "Braised Giblets."
You're going to the food co-op? What're you picking up? "Braised Giblets."
What should we have with this asparagus? "Braised Giblets."
What'd you have for lunch today? "Braised Giblets."

Biggirl
09-08-2001, 10:05 AM
Happy, Happy
Joy, Joy
Happy, Happy
Joy, Joy


This only works with the visual of Ren repeated hitting himself in the head with a hammer.

Guinastasia
09-08-2001, 11:09 AM
I was always partial to the one where Ren's cousin Sven came, and he and Stimpy were playing the "Don't Wizz On the Electric Fence", so Ren goes, "But first, but FIRST! I gotta take a wizz!" And so he does, and then they die and go to Hell and the devil says, "Hmm, looks like somebody wizzed on the electric fence."

And on that note...

Log rolls downstairs
Rolls over in pairs
Rolls over your neighbor's dog
What's great for a snack
It fits on your back
it's Log Log Log!

It's Log Log Log
It's big, it's heavy, it's wood
It's Log Log Log
It's better than bad it's good

Everyone loves Log
Everyone needs Log
Come on and get your log
Get your Log Get your log!

GrizzRich
09-08-2001, 11:39 AM
I don't remember the quote, because I was laughing so hard....

...but Ren was showing off his collection of autographed, glass-top coffee tables; signed by Danny Thomas, Raymond Burr, and one other that I couldn't make out.

Some of you will know what I'm talking about....
...others will have to figure it out for themselves.

darian00
09-08-2001, 11:57 AM
JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY!!!!


You insipid little monkey
You bloated sack of protoplasm
Shut up you eediot
YOU FILTHY SWINE! I WILL KIIIIIIIIIIIIL YOU!
Teeth to the left of me. Gums to the right of me. I tell you I CAN'T STAND IT! I'm going...maaaaaaaaaaaaad.
It is not I who am crazy. It is I who am mad! Didn't you hear it? Can't you hear the crowds? Why won't they leave me alone?!
DON'T TOUCH IT! IT'S THE HISTORY ERASER BUTTON YOU FOOL!

oh so many more...

Pantology
09-08-2001, 01:24 PM
"It's all so clear to me now... I'm the Keeper of the Cheese, and you're the Lemon Merchant."

The Bitterdrunk Kid
09-08-2001, 01:35 PM
Originally posted by GrizzRich
I don't remember the quote, because I was laughing so hard....

...but Ren was showing off his collection of autographed, glass-top coffee tables; signed by Danny Thomas, Raymond Burr, and one other that I couldn't make out.



Desi Arnaz.


I love the Happy Happy Joy Joy Song.

"Hello boys and girls! This is your old pal, Stinky Wizzleteets, and I'm gonna sing you a song about (?) No! I'm gonna sing you a song about being happy!"

They sing the song, then he comes back and talks again.

"You don't sound like you're very happy! I'll teach you to be happy! I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs! It's the little critters of nature! They don't know that they're ugly! That's very funny! A fly marrying a bumblebee! I told ya I'd shoot, but ya didn't believe me! WHY DID'NT YOU BELIEVE ME!!!"

Then they finish up the song.

I also love the Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen song.

Verrain
09-08-2001, 01:45 PM
A great big candy-like button!

And you haven't lived until you see Space Madness in Japanese.

Biggirl
09-08-2001, 02:25 PM
[QUOTE]Originally posted by The Bitterdrunk Kid

"Hello boys and girls! This is your old pal, Stinky Wizzleteets, and I'm gonna sing you a song about (?) [QUOTE]

Whale.

pezwookiee
09-08-2001, 03:34 PM
Mr Horse: Do you have any rubber... Walrus Protectors?

Walrus: Call the police........

Sealemon88
09-08-2001, 03:43 PM
So...what what kind of sandwich would you like?

MEAT!

OK, what kind of meat?

MEAT!

Alright...what kind of bread would you like?

MEAT!

So...a meat on meat sandwich. Ok, then what would you like to drink?


...MEAT!

custard dragon
09-08-2001, 04:49 PM
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSShhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!


Ren's taking a coma.

rackensack
09-08-2001, 06:16 PM
"Cadet, belay that nosepicking!"

Geek Mecha
09-08-2001, 06:59 PM
*holding Ren's head as the Abraham Lincoln statue's head lies in pieces on the floor*

"Oh... his head!"


And I love the ep where they're at the museum looking at dinosaur skeletons and that old guy starts spouting reasons why he thinks dinosaurs went extinct: "They went swimming right after eating and they drowned!" "They ran around with scissors in their hands!" "I ran 'em over with my truck!"

Kbean
09-08-2001, 09:27 PM
Don't whiz on the electric fence!

And who could forget...

Our country reeks of trees
Our yaks are really large
And they smell like rotting beef carcasses
And we have to clean-up after them
And our saddle sores are the best
We proudly wear women's clothing
And searing sand blows up our skirts
And buzzards, they soar overhead
And poisonous snakes devour us whole
Our bones will bleach in the sun.
And we will probably go to hell
And that is our great reward
For being the-uh-roy-yal
Canadian kilted yaksmen
Our country reeks of trees
Our yaks are really large
And they smell like rotting beef carcasses
And we have to clean-up after them
And out saddle sores are the best
We proudly wear women's clothing
And searing sand blows up our skirts
And buzzards, they soar overhead
And poisonous snakes devour us whole
Our bones will bleach in the sun
And we will probably go to hell
And that is our great reward
For being the-uh-roy-yal
Candian kilted yaksmen


I love Ren and Stimpy...

silent_rob
09-08-2001, 09:34 PM
Originally posted by Sealemon88
So...a meat on meat sandwich. Ok, then what would you like to drink?
...MEAT!

"You heard the little boy, Ren, get him a big glass of meat."
*Ren pours a glass of various hunks of meat*

I can't remember any specific quotes from it, but I love the one where Ren makes the little boy out of eggs. I think his name was Pinn-egg-io.

Kamino Neko
09-08-2001, 10:15 PM
Originally posted by silent_rob
I can't remember any specific quotes from it, but I love the one where Ren makes the little boy out of eggs. I think his name was Pinn-egg-io.

Eggyolkio, actually.

'I...love you...Daddy....'

That episode disturbed my unduely.

Lumpy
09-08-2001, 10:25 PM
The hillbilly restaurant's guarantee of quality: "If you don't keep it down, you don't pay!"

RoboDude
09-08-2001, 10:36 PM
Stimpy: Ren, I have to do a #1.

Ren: Okay.

(Stimpy uses the bathroom, and then returns)

Ren: Was that a good #1?




Stimpy: Ren, I have to do a #2.

(Again, Stimpy uses the bathroom)


Stimpy: Ren, I have to do a #3.

(Stimpy goes to the bathroom and starts watching a TV he hid in the toilet.)

Ren: Wait a minute.....There's no such thing as a #3!

Tony Montana
09-08-2001, 11:59 PM
1) stimpy: "because youll get mad and hit me"
ren: "WHEN have i EVER?"
2)ren to stimpy: "your wealth of ignorance astounds me"

RickJay
09-09-2001, 12:47 AM
"My dinosaur droppings! Painted like EASTER EGGS!"

"Five bucks, huh? I'll take the whole mess of them! Now GET OUT!"

"I thought you were a... circus midget!"

psychogumby
09-09-2001, 11:14 AM
From Commander Hoek and Cadet Stimpy in 'Space Madness': Ren - "It is not I who am crazy, it is I who am MAD!".

From one of the fairytale ones (might have been 'Robin Hoek'): Stimpy - 'And please bless Grandma, and Grandpa ...' Ren - 'And please give me a million dollars, and a fridge with a padlock ... and ... heh heh, oh yeah, HUGE PECTORAL MUSCLES!'.

Oh joy!

Manduck
09-09-2001, 03:51 PM
"What are ya?"

Weird_AL_Einstein
09-09-2001, 08:47 PM
[obsessive nitpick]

Originally posted by Guinastasia


Log rolls downstairs
Rolls over in pairs


I believe the part I underlined should read "...alone or"

[/obsessive nitpick]

Lucki Chaarms
09-09-2001, 10:44 PM
The very best:

Ren and Stimpy knock on firehouse door.
Fireman's head sticks out.

Fireman: I've had it up to HERE WITH YOU PEOPLE!!!! Oh, I'm sorry... I thought you were circus midgets!

BWAHAHAHA!! CIRCUS MIDGETS HAD BEEN BOTHERING THE FIREMAN!! KNOCKING ON HIS DOOR AND DOING CIRCUS TRICKS OR SOMETHING!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! OH... oh... oh so funny.

LC

RoboDude
09-09-2001, 10:54 PM
Fleck the walls with stinky diapers
Fa la la la la, la la la la
'Tis the season yaks get shaven
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Don we now our rubber nipples
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Fill your uncle's boots with coleslaw
Fa la la la la, la la la la

See the yaks sneak in discreetly
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Shaving front and back completely
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Follow him in shaving leisure
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Then I lick up sink scum treasure
Fa la la la la, la la la la

TheLoadedDog
09-09-2001, 11:10 PM
Are you clinging tenaciously to my buttocks?

Zebra
09-09-2001, 11:18 PM
For some reason there is a line from the show where they joined the army that sticks in my head.

After they come out of the tear gass chamber and Stimpy is crying and Ren is not Stimpy ask him why he isn't crying.

Ren says.


I cheated.
I held my breath.



That just kills me.

GIGObuster
09-10-2001, 12:46 AM
Stimpy -Ė Calm down, Itís all right, itís just a couple of dimes.

Ren -- DIMES?!?!? What does it mean?

Stimpy -- You've been visited by the Bloody Head Fairy!!!!!!!


:D

FallenAngel
09-13-2001, 06:00 PM
Stimpy: Oh JOY! Shaving scum.

Heath Doolin
09-14-2001, 02:44 AM
Fake Dad was the best (the one where they Ren becomes Dad to insane prisoner Kowalski)

"OK KOWALSKI!!! THAT'S IT! PULL EM DOWN!!!!!!!"

Just the name Kowalski gets me laughing

Cap'n Crude
09-14-2001, 05:52 PM
[my own nitpick]
Apparently you're all too young to remember the Slinky commercial that Log was stolen from. If you'd ever heard it, you'd know that the line is, and must be:

What rolls down stairs
Alone or in pairs ... etc.
[/my own nitpick]

You've already covered many of my favorite lines (especially "You feelthy swine! I will KEEEELL you!!") but here are a few more, from memory...

From the Wild West episode:
Three-fingered Hoek: "You need look no further, Mr. Sheriff; for it is WE who are your villains!"

Mr. Horse: "They're horse thieves, you morons!"
Sheriff and deputy: (after a long pause with the Jeopardy music playing) "HORSE THIEVES! HANG 'EM!"

Deputy: "Hey sheriff, we cain't hang these fellers."
Sheriff: "Why not?"
Deputy: "The skinny one don't weigh enough, and the fat one ain't got no neck."
Sheriff: "Aww, who we gone ta hang now?"
Deputy: (resignedly) "I guess we'll have to hang each other..."
Both: (elatedly shriek with joy)

From the one with Stimpy's inventions:
Ren: "Must ... iron ... underpants ... for Stimpy!"

Ren: "Hey, these are great, Stimpy! How do they work?"
Stimpy: "They're full of glue. Wait right there, I'll go get the Stay-Put underpants and hat!"
Ren: "You feelthy swine! I will KEEEELL you!"

Stimpy: "Happy to be of service?" (I use this one all the time)

From "Marooned":
Ren: (to female chihuahua doppelganger) "Ohh, baby, I lohve you."

From "The Littlest Giant":
Ren:
"Oh woe is I,
The well has gone dry
And my cow only gives powdered milk.

I tell you no lie,
My sow she does fry,
And my chicken will only lay silt."

Ren: "Big? Why, you're repulsively titanic!"

[b]From the one where they're selling the rubber nipples:
Mom: "Do you want to sleep out in the yard?"
Dad: "You mean, for a change?"

Ren: "You don't know how to sell anything. You can't even whiz by yourself."

From "In the Army":
Sarge: "Grrr... Congrabulations. Ya gradjeeated! Yer full-fledged tank paratroopers!"

From "Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen
Ren: "Look out! It's a Kodiak Marmoset!"
Narrator: "The world's largest (smallest) carnivore."
Ren: "Heelllp! He's ... Merrrdering us!"

Oh, how I miss that show.

Cap'n Crude
09-14-2001, 05:55 PM
Shite. I meant to preview that. Sorry.

Kamino Neko
09-14-2001, 09:56 PM
Originally posted by Cap'n Crude
[my own nitpick]
Apparently you're all too young to remember the Slinky commercial that Log was stolen from. If you'd ever heard it, you'd know that the line is, and must be:

What rolls down stairs
Alone or in pairs ... etc.
[/my own nitpick]

Nitpick of the nitpick:

I think this was already pointed out by Weird Al Einstein.

(BTW, about that slinky commercial:

What walks down stairs,
Alone or in pairs,
And makes a Slinkity(?) sound?

A spring! A spring!
A marvelous thing!
Everyone knows it's Slinky!)

Mr2001
09-15-2001, 10:27 AM
"What does it do?" "Maybe something bad... maybe something good. We'll never know. Because you won't TOUCH it, WILL you?!"

"What's that?" "Oh, that's just my brain. It's always falling out."

More Cowbell
09-15-2001, 11:13 PM
"What does it do?" "Maybe something bad... maybe something good. We'll never know. Because you won't TOUCH it, WILL you?!"
Would that be the button? The shiny red button?!

Mr2001
09-16-2001, 06:44 AM
Indeed it would... a jolly, candy-like button!

sturmhauke
09-17-2001, 12:02 PM
It stays crunchy even in milk.

Wanna see my booger collection?

bouv
09-17-2001, 02:32 PM
Originally posted by sturmhauke
It stays crunchy even in milk.


[yet another nitpick]
Well, since the product was sugar-frosted milk, it stays crunchy, even in cereal.
[/yet another nitpick]

Why A Duck
09-17-2001, 02:42 PM
Stimpy: But Ren, He's your son.

Ren: My FAKE son!

Stimpy: The product of your loins.

Ren: My FAKE loins!

Enore_Tsotset
09-17-2001, 03:29 PM
I think it was part of the Christmas special:

As Stimpy lost his flatulence "stinky" he asked the boogers under the bench if they had seen him and they had this to say: "Hey man, he talks to farts"

I still giggle now and again when I think of that.

And I can still sing the entire "Log Song"... How sad is that?

"It fits on your back and great for a snack, it log log log!!"

sturmhauke
09-18-2001, 06:02 AM
Originally posted by bouv
Originally posted by sturmhauke
It stays crunchy even in milk.


[yet another nitpick]
Well, since the product was sugar-frosted milk, it stays crunchy, even in cereal.
[/yet another nitpick]
I didn't see the episode you have in mind. I was referring to the song that Stimpy wrote for the Gritty Kitty Litter contest so he could get on the Muddy Mudskipper show. Ren spouted that line sarcastically, when Stimpy couldn't think of a rhyme. Stimpy gasped in delight of course.

Evnglion
09-18-2001, 07:42 AM
Where can I get some of these episodes for viewing? I miss this show dearly....

psychogumby
09-18-2001, 06:13 PM
Originally posted by Evnglion
Where can I get some of these episodes for viewing? I miss this show dearly....

Try one of those un-named file sharing programs, dude.

I'm in the process of trying to procure a good video capture card so I can transfer my tapes with early R&S on them to DivX. :)

Jeep's Phoenix
09-18-2001, 10:37 PM
From the "Rubber Nipple Salesmen episode":

Stimpy: I have a dream, that one day, everyone, everywhere, will BUY MY NIPPLES.

[Ren smacks Stimpy.]

Ren: You keep your dream, and I'll keep the money! Now shut up and drive!


I also liked Muddy Mudskipper.

"Who's the greatest mudskipper of them all?
Who can skip through the mud with the greatest of ease,
What kind of wonderful guy?
Who can crawl like a dog without bending his knees,
Who's got cemented eyes?
It's Muddy, Mudskipper
It's Muddy, Mudskipper
It's the Muddy, Mud-skiiiiperrr shooooow!"

xanadu
09-24-2001, 01:26 AM
I just love the episode where Stimpy says to Ren while he's in the shower: "Now Stimpy - Don't forget to wash where the sun doesn't shine!" Then the cartoonists do a closeup of Ren's butt with warts, moles, and fleas crawling around. Cracks me up every time!!

Hey, I just realized that I reached 200 posts!!! :D

whistlepig
09-24-2001, 01:46 AM
"YOU, YOU COVETETH MY ICE CREAM BAR!"

A line I have spoken out loud with an astonishingly passionate and sincere delivery, only to have everyone else quickly exit the frozen food aisle.


<hijacky thingy>
From Invader Zim:

"Have you the brain worms?"

<end hijacky chippy guidy thingy>

Buck The Diver
09-29-2001, 01:53 AM
Originally posted by Jeep's Phoenix
[B
I also liked Muddy Mudskipper.

"Who's the greatest mudskipper of them all?
Who can skip through the mud with the greatest of ease,
What kind of wonderful guy?
Who can crawl like a dog without bending his knees,
Who's got cemented eyes?
It's Muddy, Mudskipper
It's Muddy, Mudskipper
It's the Muddy, Mud-skiiiiperrr shooooow!" [/B]

NITPICK ALERT NITPICK ALERT

Jeep's, I think thats "segmented eyes". Referring, of course, to the mudskipper's bifocal pupils, enabling it to see both above and below the water at the same time.

We now return to our regular posting.

Caracticus Potts
09-29-2001, 05:53 AM
"We're not hitchhiking anymore ... we're riding!"

Not such a great quote, but a great scene.

Billy Rubin
09-29-2001, 06:11 PM
And- I'll release- THE MARMOSETS!!!

b.

[pouty face] I miss ren and stimpy!!![/pouty face]

Mikemike2
09-29-2001, 06:41 PM
You boys like to have fun, don't ya? [Sure] Go ahead and have fun!

Yackyelder
07-24-2013, 04:30 AM
"Do I know you?....
Did my wife send you?....
how do I know your not from the FBI?....
"ok so I made a Mistake! one mistake, cant a man start over?
do I have to keep on paying?? Maybe I should make another Mistake?!
maybe two more!" " please sir we can assure you we only want to sell you some rubber nipples"

JKellyMap
07-24-2013, 05:54 AM
For once, I sincerely appreciate a zombie thread's re-emergence. I had no idea that the "Ren and Stimpy" show writers were so clever, funny, and creative -- now I'm a fan just from reading this thread, never having (yet) enjoyed a real episode.

Also, it's interesting (and I guess comforting) to see that people were able to banter about fun stuff like Ren and Stimpy mere days after 9/11.

Bakhesh
07-24-2013, 06:47 AM
<Stimpy peers over fence>
"there's no dog.....but there's a baboon!"

lawoot
07-24-2013, 07:05 AM
Also, it's interesting (and I guess comforting) to see that people were able to banter about fun stuff like Ren and Stimpy mere days after 9/11.
Almost necessary, actually. Kinda cathartic.

(post #3 in the thread, and still hanging around...)

Hippy Hollow
07-24-2013, 08:12 AM
Mr Horse: Do you have any rubber... Walrus Protectors?

Walrus: Call the police........

That's the one! Usually it's just the walrus line.. So appropriate for many situations. :)

Son of a Rich
07-24-2013, 08:37 AM
"I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!"

Jumpbass
07-24-2013, 12:09 PM
Ask Dr Stupid!

It's the Queen Bean!

That one gets quoted every time we have baked beans.

panache45
07-24-2013, 12:53 PM
I'd have to go with

"Happy happy joy joy."

It's my favorite quote and my favorite episode.

NDP
07-24-2013, 02:56 PM
"I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!"

Trivial note: That and most of the other seemingly random spoken-word bits from "The Happy Happy Joy Joy" song are actual movie lines said by Burl Ives (the singer that Stinky Whizzlecheets is a parody of). The "I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!" quote is from The Big Country.

Anyway:

"My collection of infectious diseases! VIOLATED!"*


*The way Ren says "VIOLATED" is what makes it funny.

Intergalactic Gladiator
07-24-2013, 03:45 PM
"No Sir, I don't like it. His butt's too smooth."

WordMan
07-24-2013, 04:01 PM
What about what Powdered Toast Man instructs the fellow he has saved, and tossed up onto his back as he (PTM) flies away: "Quick man! Cling tenaciously to my buttocks!!"

Astroboy14
07-24-2013, 06:45 PM
For once, I sincerely appreciate a zombie thread's re-emergence. I had no idea that the "Ren and Stimpy" show writers were so clever, funny, and creative -- now I'm a fan just from reading this thread, never having (yet) enjoyed a real episode.



WHAT???

Hie thineself to youtube!

Space MADness! (http://youtube.com/watch?v=PZCiZpph9jo)

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