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#1
Old 04-08-2002, 10:25 AM
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Do obese men have trouble urinating? (kinda gross question)

For some time now, here at work sometimes I go into the mens room and find that the toilet is covered in urine with the seat down (not lid, just the seat). It is splashed on the floor, etc... totally nasty. I figured there was someone who had a mental thing going or hated the company and this was his way of getting even. However I had noticed one day that as I went in, this one extremely obese guy in there washing his hands. I go to enter the stall, and its covered in pee again and I blew up, saying that if i ever caught who was doing it i would personally shove their head in the toilet. They guy muttered something like "yeah, i agree, i used the other one"... Then on friday I was heading to the restroom and he was just coming out, and again it was like that. I spoke to his supervisor who is my peer, and she said that our boss had said something once about him coming out of another bathroom that is hardly ever used, and the boss went in and it was like that. Anecdotal evidence, I agree, but it appears likely it is him. I said something to my wife about it, that the guy should just sit like a girl if he cant go normally (I figured he cant reach to direct the stream which caused the problem). My wife said that a friend of hers had told a story of someone who was keeping an obese kid, and that he had to sit to pee, but somehow it made his penis point upwards and he couldnt get it aimed downward. He had to place a washcloth across his lap and basically just pee into it, and let the urine trickle dow as it can (hey, I warned you!!!).

Its not like this guy is the only obese employed person anywhere, what do other obese people do?
#2
Old 04-08-2002, 10:44 AM
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Re: Do obese men have trouble urinating? (kinda gross question)

Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
Its not like this guy is the only obese employed person anywhere, what do other obese people do?
Here's some REAL TMI ...

...

...

... sometimes a man can get obese enough that their flaccid penis is essentially buried in fat. It's still there, but does not protrude much from the surrounding flesh. Reaching around the gut is not the problem. The problem is getting a grip on 1/2" (or less) worth of flaccid penis to direct the stream.

BTW, I'm not talking about Guiness-Book obesity here. Guys with this problem are a lot less hefty than you are likely imagining. It depends a lot on where a person carried their bodyfat.

For these men, if using a public toilet with no urinals available, the best thing to do is to urinate sitting down. If, in the case of the obese child mentioned above, he can try sitting and leaning way forward to direct his stream into the toilet with a free hand. A hamper or chair can be placed in front of him to give him something on which to balance himself. Also, if necessary, he can use a backscratcher or some other long instrument to direct his stream.

Are there urinals available at your work? One portly fellow at my work uses the urinal with no hands. He doesn't have to aim because the target is so wide, as it were.
#3
Old 04-08-2002, 10:47 AM
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Yes, there is a urinal, but I would think he would have difficulty using it as I think his belly hangs lower than the lip of the urinal. He is not a tall person, just extremely fat.
#4
Old 04-08-2002, 11:05 AM
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Can I add another question here? If a man is too obese to "direct his stream," how can he wash his nether regions?
#5
Old 04-08-2002, 11:13 AM
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Not only that, but how can he wipe himself after defecating?










Forget I asked, I just decided I don't want to know.
#6
Old 04-08-2002, 11:18 AM
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I am really hoping someone knows something of this issue and can contribute. We are going to have to get HR involved because this is a disgusting health issue, and it cant be ignored just because this guy's feelings may be hurt. I feel bad for the company as this might end up as some kind of discrimination case, but the rest of us have a right to use a restroom that is not covered in urine. What must customers think that come to see us? This is a nice, white collar office, not a garage (not that I'm putting down garages) where the toilet hasnt been cleaned in months. I feel especially sorry for the guy who goes around all day cleaning the restrooms in the building, I guess he just accepts that at least once a day he has to clean up a piss covered restroom.
#7
Old 04-08-2002, 11:23 AM
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There could be a couple of factors at work here.

Obese guy may not have any trouble "directing the stream" but may not be able to see around his belly to figure out where to direct the stream.

Obese guy may have a prostrate or urinary problem that causes the stream to "dribble" so no matter where it's aimed, it doesn't quite get there.
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#8
Old 04-08-2002, 11:27 AM
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Rather than take it to the authorities, you could just take the guy aside (presuming you know it's him) and have a quiet word with him. Just ask him to clean up after himself - there's toilet paper handy I imagine. Something like "Some of us have noticed that the bathroom is a bit unsanitary/a mess after you've been in there and we'd appreciate it if you'd see that it's clean enough for other people to use after you're done".

The issue for you isn't whether or not he can pee properly, it's him not cleaning up after himself.
#9
Old 04-08-2002, 11:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
[B]We are going to have to get HR involved because this is a disgusting health issue...
Just be very careful that you can be dead-bang certain. The bathroom was clean at 2:20. "Nobody but you used it before 2:45, and we know because we watched the door."

Otherwise its pretty deniable.
#10
Old 04-08-2002, 11:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Francesca
Rather than take it to the authorities, you could just take the guy aside (presuming you know it's him) and have a quiet word with him.
I'd suggest leaving an anonymous note on his desk instead. Saying if he doesn't clean up after himself, management will be dealing with him. That way, if the guy is fired or something, he won't take out his anger on someone he knows/thinks is the one who "reported" him.
#11
Old 04-08-2002, 11:56 AM
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Francesca, I know what you mean about not taking it up with the authorities, but I think it needs to be done anyway. Since I am in management, its important that the company is protected from any kind of discrimination claim. Before anything is done, whether its a "take-aside" or an actual action, I want the company to be aware so that whatever they deem to be the appropriate action is the one taken. As far as just a request to clean up after himself, I would have thought that my threat to rub whoever was doing it's face in it would have been a subtle enough hint.

And I don't consider wiping up with toilet paper acceptable if my naked buttocks may find their way onto that seat. Wiped off seat does not equal clean, it is just dry. Why the hell won't he raise the seat in the first place? In addition to what is on the seat, there is the issue of what is on the floor. In no way would he be able to reach the puddle he makes on the floor. He is so fat he can barely fit in the stall as it is.
#12
Old 04-08-2002, 12:12 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
And I don't consider wiping up with toilet paper acceptable if my naked buttocks may find their way onto that seat. Wiped off seat does not equal clean, it is just dry. Why the hell won't he raise the seat in the first place? In addition to what is on the seat, there is the issue of what is on the floor. In no way would he be able to reach the puddle he makes on the floor. He is so fat he can barely fit in the stall as it is.
No, a wiped-dry seat is not a health hazard, since (as noted in a Staff Report on What Diseases Can You Catch From a Toilet Seat) urine doesn't carry any common diseases. So yes, your primary concern is why this inconsiderate co-worker doesn't mop up his mess after he's done? Lots of people dribble on the seat, but most of them have the common courtesy to clean up.

I agree with the person who suggested leaving an anonymous note: it'll lessen the embarrassment, and give him an opportunity to clean up his act, so to speak.
#13
Old 04-08-2002, 12:23 PM
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"Lots of people dribble on the seat"

I'm sorry, I cannot accept this. There is absolutely no reason for a man to urinate with the seat down. Me, personally, I raise the lid with my foot. I'm not a person who is overly germ conscious, but in a public toilet I try to make as little contact with the fixtures as possible.

And to be honest, I really don't give a damn about his embarrassment being that this has been going on for so long. I mean, who needs to be told that it is not acceptable to leave the bathroom like that for someone else to clean up?
I agree that there is no absolute proof at this time, and that it needs to be established if it is indeed him or not. This has been going on for a very, very long time. He usually uses the handicapped bathroom, which is just a single user bathroom next to the regular one. One of my co workers i talked to about this said that that bathroom is often that way. My guess is that if someone is occupying the single user one he then uses the regular one, which is why I only encounter this once every few weeks.
#14
Old 04-08-2002, 01:09 PM
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Okay, how about this idea? Follow the fatty into the bathroom when you see him go in. Then, as soon as fatty exits his stall, you go in and pitch a fit over the mess fatty just made. There's your proof, and you can confront him right there.
#15
Old 04-08-2002, 01:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by gingersnap
Okay, how about this idea? Follow the fatty into the bathroom when you see him go in. Then, as soon as fatty exits his stall, you go in and pitch a fit over the mess fatty just made. There's your proof, and you can confront him right there.
Sounds like a plan. I'll have to get some others involved as his work area is not in my direct line of sight. The only problem would be that it needs to be determined before he goes in that the room is indeed clean so that no excuse can be made. As one of my peer said, they had gone in the single user room before and left immediately, though they worried that if someone saw them leaving they might have thought he was the one doing it.
#16
Old 04-08-2002, 07:22 PM
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I can only imagine what his house bathroom looks like.....

What does fat have to do with this? Could it be related to Diabetes, kidneys, or prostates too?

The point is I think, is that you don't want the restroom to be a mess. You don't want people peeing all over the seat (Ever see a mans bathroom at a bar?). So who would one talk to about this? Why not just close the bathroom? Wouldn't that be a gas? You could put up a sign of some sort or give ONE key to the bathroom, then you'd know who did it.
#17
Old 04-08-2002, 07:58 PM
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Americans with Dissabilities Act

Be carefull about any confrontation. As management you are definitely liable under the Americans with Dissabilities Act. Being overly obese could be considered covered under this law. As such, it is the companies responsibility to accomodate(sp?) him, not is responsibility to accomodate you. In otherwords, you cannot reprimand him for not cleaning up after himself. Instead, you will find that the law requires you to either hire someone to clean up after him or purchase a toilet that suits his particular needs. I agree, it sounds unreasonable, but I just wanted to warn you that there could be a serious legal issue. Do not give nim anything in writing unless you are 100% sure it is in compliance with the law or it will be a nail in your coffin.
#18
Old 04-08-2002, 08:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Green Bean
Can I add another question he how can he wash his nether regions?
Ah warsh mahsef with a rag onna stick.

Being larger than average, I've never had any troubles relieving my bladder, my most masculine of devices being absorbed into mounds of fat or being locked in a permanent upright position.

The only time that I've ever had any spatter while going to the bathroom is after intimacy where the pee-hole is stuck together with "fluids" and I get one or two streams which are really hard to aim.
#19
Old 04-08-2002, 09:05 PM
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Y'know, I've heard of peer-reviewed studies, but....

(badum-ching)

Although the Americans with Disabilities Act could conceivably enter into things, it's not a one-way street. I read up on the law recently to nudge our office into compliance, and while a business is required to make a reasonable accommodation for an employee with a documented disability that impairs major life functions, the accommodation you make isn't necessarily the accommodation the employee wants.

If the employee is unable, for example, to clean the seat with toilet paper, you'd very likely be able to provide the employee with a mop and a cleaner solution to use after bathroom trips. Having a clean toilet is a necessary part of running a business; if keeping the toilet clean is inconvenient for him, too bad.

I think where you might REALLY run into AADA problems would be if a disabled client came into the office and found that the only accessible bathroom was pee-spattered.

Daniel -- not a lawyer
#20
Old 04-08-2002, 09:22 PM
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Quote:
And to be honest, I really don't give a damn about his embarrassment being that this has been going on for so long.
Trying to lessen his embarrassment isn't only to be nice to him -- it can also get you better results. When people are embarrassed, they tend to want to fight back at the person who embarrassed them, so he may end up getting a chip on his shoulder and trying to push the discrimination angle so he doesn't look like the bad guy. If he can get off with an anonymous warning, he may realize that he can clean up his act and avoid having an embarrassing confrontation with someone he has to see on a regular basis, whereas if you start with the embarrassment, he's got nothing to lose by making a big issue of it.

...reminds me of the farmer who named his three dogs Barky ('cause he's the barkin'est), Bitey ('cause he's the bitin'est) and Beethoven ('cause he's the peein'est).
#21
Old 04-08-2002, 10:12 PM
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I seriously doubt that it has anything to do with obesity. This jerk's regularly messing up things knowing that later in the day some poor schmuck is going to sit it in. Sounds like a fethish-grade problem to me. People with fetishes only have a legal case in Ally McBeal land.
#22
Old 04-08-2002, 10:33 PM
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I don't think you should single this guy out yet. I suggest placing placards in every stall in the bathrooms, noting that the bathroom is cleaned only once a day, so all employees are asked to be considerate about how they leave the stalls so they are usable for other coworkers. That might make all stalls better for all users, no matter who your culprit for this particular problem is.

If the problem continues after all bathroom users have been reminded like this, then it might be the appropriate time to pursue it individually.

The problem might just be that the fellow is a slob. If that's the problem, then it would be damned insensitive to bring his weight (unrelated) into it.

I'm also real curious as to what a term like "fatty" contributes to a GQ thread.
#23
Old 04-08-2002, 11:40 PM
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This is tricky. I'll go along with the anonymous note on his desk...but I can't agree with taking disciplanary action at this time.

You have nothing more than anecdotal evidence...and you can't put conditions on this guy that don't apply to all the rest of the staff. If you are going to make restroom cleanliness an issue, then you have to make it an issue with ALL employees....and I don't think you want to go where that leads.

If the note doesn't work...then your best recourse is to find a solid performance-related issue to terminate his employment. Either that or figure out a way to eliminate his position and lay him off.

Getting rid of him should solve your problem and free up time to discipline those that chew with their mouth open in the company cafeteria.
#24
Old 04-09-2002, 08:06 AM
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Not restricted to the topic on hand but in everything else also: I do not find anonymous communications acceptable in any way. If you have something to say, say it and identify yourself. If you do not want to identify yourself, then don't say it. Anonymous communications are rude and cowardly. Maybe I could not help reading a short note but I would not read a letter or other communication I knew was not signed. I find that option totally unacceptable always but much more so in a business setting. This is not elementary school

The same effect can be achieved by a notice directed to *all* employees stating it has been noticed lately that the restrooms have not been as clean as they should be and please take care to leave them clean after use *and* notify management if you find one excesively dirty. This way the originator of the message is identified and no person is singled out. The person at fault would now have a duty, not only to keep the toilet clean, but also to notify certain person if he should find it dirty (so it can be cleaned). This way he cannot just leave the place and say "I didn't do it".
#25
Old 04-09-2002, 09:06 AM
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From a management perspective I would go with a combination of sailor and CrankyAsAnOldMan suggestions. Place the signs and send a memo out to all employee's regarding the new signs, mentioning there have been problems (and complaints?) about the mess.

I've found through personal experience that when you are in management and facing a problem such as this, it is always best to institute universal change. Never target a specific person until you have targeted the whole. If you point out his bad toilet habits this may enable him (and other staff) in turn to point the finger at others (possibly even you). this can change the social / political climate of the office in a most unpleasant way.
#26
Old 04-09-2002, 09:21 AM
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Look you guys, I am sorry, when I was younger I was confused, and lets just say the sex change went all wrong, ill try to clean up after myself

Serioulsy, I think the OP is being a little harsh here, look at the situation. Every time this guy goes pee, he dreads it, he knows damn well he is doing it, and for some reason or another, he can not help it. Clean up after? It was said he had trouble fitting in the stall, you think he can easily get on his hands and knees and mop up, probably not likely.

I assume the company is large enough to afford a remodel, put in a urinal, and a short ahndicapped one as well for the short fat guy so you can do his business. You can not repreomand a guy for a physical problem he can not help, thats like firing a mentaly retarded kid for drooling on the desk, just not cool.

Add to all this, half the reason the guy is fat probably is cause he is depressed, and I think this would add to it, some pee on the seat is a small price to pay for not pushing soemone over the edge.

Maybe talk to his friends, or try the friendly approach.
#27
Old 04-09-2002, 09:58 AM
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Sorry, ScottHaneda, but "I can't help it" is no excuse.

The guy is a grown-up. If he has some kind of problem that leads to such a situation, it is his responsibility to go to the appropriate people and ask for some kind of accomodation.
#28
Old 04-09-2002, 03:59 PM
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My husband told me once about his grandmother who kept a spray bottle full of bleach water and a rag by the toilet and a note telling all the little (and big) boys to wipe up after themselves if necessary.

So, perhaps along with the note in the bathroom for all the employees, you should leave some janitorial supplies available, especially since the descriptions of this mess seem to go beyond a few sprinkles that can be wiped up with toilet paper. Perhaps this guy would do better if a mop were available so that he didn't have to bend over so far to clean up.
#29
Old 04-09-2002, 04:13 PM
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Quote:
Ah warsh mahsef with a rag onna stick.
I was wondering how long it was going to take you Simpson-quoting Dopers to get around to this. I took much longer than I had anticipated.
#30
Old 04-10-2002, 03:16 AM
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The anonymous note thing is really horrible.

Instead of targeting this guy straight away, why not first send round a company-wide memo:

--------------------------------------
"It has come to our attention that the bathroom is being left in a less-than acceptable standard by certain members of staff. PLEASE make sure you wipe the seat/leave the bathroom acceptable for the next user. We cannot employ full-time cleaners for the one bathroom.

"If the situation does not improve, further investigative action will be taken."

--------------------------------------

The further-investigations bit should scare anyone enough into wiping the seat afterwards.

If it doesn't improve, then you can start the monitoring thing, get more certain proof who is responsible, and take it up with them.

If it is this guy, and he doesn't solve the problem, then it's not a disability issue. It's a lazy, dirty, unhygienic and inconsiderate issue.
#31
Old 04-10-2002, 09:11 AM
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I appreciate all the suggestions on how to handle the issue. However my original question regarded whether there could be a physical reason why (if indeed this particular person is responsible) this might be occurring or if it is just a matter of disregard for others.

The problem is proving who is responsible. If someone is watching the bathroom, the perpetrator would just go to another floor. I am still in disbelief that this is happening. How could someone refuse to lift the lid to pee? My wife told me that at one place she worked at someone was pooping on the floor of the womens room instead of in the toilet. They were never able to figure out who it was. People are weird...
#32
Old 04-10-2002, 12:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
However my original question regarded whether there could be a physical reason why (if indeed this particular person is responsible) this might be occurring ...
I suppose the lack of an answer might indicate that there is probably not a physical reason why this is occurring. That's no proof, I know, but I would think that amongst the hundreds of people who have viewed this thread, someone would have known if obesity could cause this kind of problem. There are lots of obese guys in the world, and I suspect that if this was a common problem, someone would have heard something about it.

So, I'm guessing that he is doing it on purpose (if it is him).
#33
Old 04-10-2002, 02:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
People are weird...
Yup. I think that is the one consistent in life. Perhaps you should give this man a bucket and a roll of toilet paper...
#34
Old 04-10-2002, 02:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
However my original question regarded whether there could be a physical reason why (if indeed this particular person is responsible) this might be occurring or if it is just a matter of disregard for others.
OK, you've forced me into this.

TMI ALERT












As bordelund said:
Quote:
... sometimes a man can get obese enough that their flaccid penis is essentially buried in fat. It's still there, but does not protrude much from the surrounding flesh. Reaching around the gut is not the problem. The problem is getting a grip on 1/2" (or less) worth of flaccid penis to direct the stream.
I have to concede that this is factual -- I've had it happen to me. However, and this is a HUGE however, it doesn't happen often, and it certainly has NOTHING to do with not picking the toilet seat up. Matter of fact, while I'm in TMI mode, because of the way my body is, it's worse if I sit to pee. Standing is the only way.

I just want to stress, though, that while this HAS happened to me, and I've made a mess of things, it is by no means a constant or even frequent occurance. However, guess what? Even if ya make a mess, it CAN be cleaned up. I should know, since I've done it. Was it disinfectantly (new word :x) clean? Of course not. But was it at least presentable? You betcha!

I dunno if this helps, but I hope so, because I sure wasn't thrilled about sharing any of this.

Mike


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#35
Old 04-10-2002, 02:24 PM
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And even though borderlund didn't say it, borderlond did.

Apologies!

Wow, am I having a good day, or what?
#36
Old 04-10-2002, 02:25 PM
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Thank you so much. I really do appreciate your willingness to share that with us. One thing I have learned is that very large people have challenges that most of us wouldn't imagine. However as you mentioned, that doesnt excuse leaving the mess for the rest of us. Thanks again and I hope someday I am able to enlighten you on some matter.
#37
Old 04-10-2002, 02:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by gingersnap
Follow the fatty...
as soon as fatty...
the mess fatty...
Is that really necessary?
#38
Old 04-10-2002, 03:22 PM
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Another person weighing in on the "don't assume obesity was the cause" and "make your suggestion universal and don't single someone out" suggestions.

The placards should work, just make sure they're waterproof.
#39
Old 04-10-2002, 06:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by hudley
Thank you so much. I really do appreciate your willingness to share that with us. One thing I have learned is that very large people have challenges that most of us wouldn't imagine. However as you mentioned, that doesnt excuse leaving the mess for the rest of us. Thanks again and I hope someday I am able to enlighten you on some matter.
You're very welcome. I'm glad I was able to help

Mike
#40
Old 04-10-2002, 07:50 PM
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This (confirmed) fact:
  • sometimes a man can get obese enough that their flaccid penis is essentially buried in fat…. The problem is getting a grip on 1/2" (or less) worth of flaccid penis to direct the stream (of urine)...
keeps ringing, over and over in my ears. Not only has it answered that locker-room question I’ve posed to friends in the past but it should also shed new light on the opinions of those who made excuses or had sympathy for stubby.

Those 34 words should help open the eyes of the whole “It’s OK to be overweight…it’s a choice…there’s nothing wrong with being fat” crowd. Metabolic abnormalities aside, anyone who eats to the point of nearly rendering themselves gender-neutral deserves no ones sympathy. Why would anyone come to the defense and care more this (dishonest, I might add) man than he obviously does for himself?
#41
Old 04-10-2002, 08:15 PM
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Well, I will come to the defense of forum separation.

Take it to the Pit. Not GQ.

Thank you.
#42
Old 04-10-2002, 08:17 PM
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JohnBckWLD, why would we not come to this individual's defense? Do you think that his is a conscious, reasoned choice, despite all societal pressures to be thin? Try a little of the sympathy that you scorn and imagine that you're obese and that you've tried to change, and failed. It's not nearly as easy as you think and for many people (myself included) it's a lifelong struggle. Many overweight people simply give up because they have little self-esteem and thus no motivation to change. Yet, for that, we should give them no sympathy, nor come to their defense? What do you suggest -- do you think constant mockery and throwing stones would be sufficient?

There are things wrong with being fat -- it is bad for your health. However, it is wrong to treat overweight people as if they suffer from some sort of moral failing or that they invite scorn by 'choosing' to be overweight.

Personally, I have a lot less of a problem with people who say "it's OK to be fat". Quite frankly, our society has a ridiculous standard of what fat and thin is, and they have very little to do with what is healthy. Even for people who are unhealthily overweight -- and yes, that is an issue -- quite frankly, it is none of your business. You have are not in the right by bringing it up nor by judging the person.

Perhaps you will label my words as 'excuses'. That's up to you. However, I don't think that I'm alone in saying that your opinion is very insulting to those of us who are overweight to make the sort of assumptions you do. Would you roll your eyes at people who have sympathy for an alcoholic because he just drinks too much? Would you scoff at those who defend people who suffer from chronic depression, because the depressed should just cheer up?

I'd think long and hard about why it's so easy for you to discard sympathy for an individual who is obviously suffering.
#43
Old 04-10-2002, 08:18 PM
Charter Member
Charter Member
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: West Des Moines, Iowa
Posts: 5,928
My apologies for the simulpost, Manhattan. If I have further to post, I will take it to the Pit.
#44
Old 04-10-2002, 08:21 PM
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Join Date: Aug 1999
Posts: 9,132
Thank you, thank you very much [/Elvis]
#45
Old 03-06-2016, 12:16 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 1
Hello friends,
I am a new member. I found this thread while trying to find answers to obesity related issues of my own.
I had to join the message board because I know I can help you...
I used to weigh 512 pounds back in 2008,.. I lost 100 pounds since then.
I'm not only obese but I also have a rare case of lymphedema called
Massive Localized Lymphedema. I am one in only 16 cases known.
Lymphedema happens when your lymphatic system gets damaged
and lymph fluid build up and causes the lower parts of your body to
swell with lymph fluid.
This man in question can easily solve his issue. Either he is not thinking,
or there is something wrong with him mentally...
My unit sits at the bottom of a crevice of fatty/lymph swollen skin
about 5 inches deep...
This man can reach and clean himself...
In public places, I straddle the toilet.
I place my feet on the right and left side of the toilet with my scrotum
hanging over the toilet water.
I let the urine flow down my scrotum, into the toilet, then wipe
my scrotum with toilet paper or paper towel...
I keep about 5/6 sheets of folded paper towel on one of my pockets where ever
I go for this reason.
You see,... It's that simple... No mess at all....
This guy is not thinking straight...
Certain public restrooms have lower toilets that are also more oval and larger in size.
This makes my method easier..
What I also do at home and what I used to do when I went out was,
I brought a hospital wash basin in a green plastic trash bag with a twist tie...
When I needed to go to the bathroom,
I held the basin between my legs, let the urine flow down my scrotum into the basin and then emptied the basin into the toilet.
I would then wipe my scrotum with paper towel and put the basin back in the bag
and close it with a twist tie...
There you go,... I certainly hope you can help this man and give him the advise I
posted...
I hope I was of some help...
Have a great day my friends!
#46
Old 03-07-2016, 02:16 AM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 13,239
Quote:
Originally Posted by DAVEW0071 View Post
Not only that, but how can he wipe himself after defecating?










Forget I asked, I just decided I don't want to know.
I could tell you about Uncle Wilf... Fortunately not my uncle, but "Joe" inherited his slightly simple uncle as a roommate when he bought the house from his parents. We joked that they sold the house to get rid of Uncle Wilf. The guy had to be 500 pounds, circulation so bad one guy when we were visiting mistook his bare legs' skin for a cast it was so white and scaly. I think it was an underactive thyroid gland. It didn't help that he ate mainly junk food and drank soda by the gallon.

"Joe" related visiting the old family farm once. The derelict farmhouse had a nice new solid stairway. Apparently one day Uncle Wilf actually fell through the stairs and it was a major effort to get him out and the stairs got rebuilt. OTOH, he was unstoppable on the high school football team as a blocker.



So... how did he wipe himself? He didn't. He stank like a dead outhouse. He worked as a taxi dispatcher and the drivers would argue who should take him home because nobody wanted to air out their cab for half an hour afterward.

But even then, he never had difficulty that I saw leaving a spray mess urinating. The biggest problem mess-wise, other than the smell, was that his foot would occasionally crack open and he'd leave little blood spots wherever he walked.



Sorry, you asked. Too late to take it back...

Last edited by md2000; 03-07-2016 at 02:18 AM.
#47
Old 03-07-2016, 02:21 AM
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,659
If he hasn't figured out how to pee in 14 years there's not much hope.
#48
Old 03-07-2016, 03:02 AM
Member
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: NE Ohio (the 'burbs)
Posts: 39,369
Carl W:

First, welcome to the Dope!

Second, lay off the return key. Just type to the end of each paragraph.
#49
Old 03-07-2016, 07:16 PM
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 3,245
I didn't realize zombies peed. Thank you once again Straight Dope for fighting my ignorance.
#50
Old 03-07-2016, 07:23 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 9,057
As for finding Mr. Happy, I saw something in a chart one time about how a very obese man had to be catheterized, but the nurses couldn't find his penis in his abdominal pannus. They had to call in a urologist, who used a

SPOILER:
vaginal speculum


to locate it and do what needed to be done.

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