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#1
Old 03-24-2003, 11:12 AM
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Question For Guys Who Have Attractive Sisters...

I met the sister of a friend of mine this weekend and couldn't help but notice that she was a very attractive young woman. I immediately wondered what it must have been like for him growing up under those circumstances- living under the same roof with a girl who is very attractive, but not being able to do anything about it. Seeing her walking around the house in various states of undress, getting out of the shower, watching her eating bananas, and so forth.

When I asked him if he thought she was attractive, he agreed that she was. When I then asked him he was able to control himself around her, he claimed that he never needed to and that what I was talking about was 'gross'. He says he thinks that she is 'attractive' and even 'sexy', just not to him. Huh? How can someone think someone is attractive when they are not attracted *to* them?? It sounds to me like he's in denial.

I don't have any sisters, and my mother was (and is) an overweight German woman- tall, husky, muscular, and broad-shouldered, with a somewhat mannish-looking face. Needless to say, having an attractive family member is not something I've ever experienced. So I can't say what I would or would not do, but I do know that I wouldn't kid myself into thinking that I am not attracted to someone simply because they are supposed to be 'off Ėlimits'.

So, tell me what it's like to grow up with a sister that you know is physically attractive. Did it create any difficulties for you? Did you ever 'fantasize' about her?? How can you think that someone is attractive and yet not be attracted to them???

Thanks.
#2
Old 03-24-2003, 11:16 AM
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Dude, unless you're weird, you don't get sexually attracted to your sister. You just don't. The message has been buried deep in your mind by society and you just don't do that.
#3
Old 03-24-2003, 11:19 AM
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My big sister was a high school cheerleader. I guess that she qualified as a babe.
No I was never attracted to her. She is my sister for crying out loud. Familarity breeds contempt.
#4
Old 03-24-2003, 11:19 AM
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I've heard that, Kalhoun, but I just don't buy it.

Why is it 'weird' to be sexually attracted to someone who's sexually attractive?
#5
Old 03-24-2003, 11:21 AM
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I recall a thread like this popping up some months ago and one fellow saying he had no 'incest taboo' and that if he'd had an attractive sister, and she was into it, too, he'd have sex with her.

Must be that there is someone out there who likes incest because it's one of the sexual fetishes (that's probably the wrong word) which receives the most hits on any porn website (don't ask me how I know that!).
#6
Old 03-24-2003, 11:29 AM
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Surreal, this thread should be of interest to you http://boards.academicpursuits.us/sdmb/...ractive+Sister
#7
Old 03-24-2003, 11:31 AM
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Sorry about that, I should have searched first.
#8
Old 03-24-2003, 11:39 AM
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Interesting link. How much of the innate non-attraction between siblings is due to their closeness during their formative years? and how much due to the common blood?

I ask, because I have kept several female friends from my school years, a few are very attractive women, but for some reason sexual attraction to them is less than I would expect because I have known them too long, they have become almost like sisters.

Would siblings who have lived separately be more likely to find each other sexually attractive? What about non-biologically related step-siblings?

Cheers Bippy
#9
Old 03-24-2003, 11:41 AM
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i seem to be building quite a track record for posting without cites, but here goes...

I recall reading a looong time ago about a study that was conducted into kids that grew up sans the parent of the opposite gender, ie... no contact from a coupla days of age or younger.

When the parent and child met up again, the result was quite a high level of sexual tension, because we look for a partner as much like us as possible, and what better combonation than direct family.

So natures' way around this is to implant the family members that you see on a daily basis from an early age into your brain in such a way that you simply cannot associate sex (being sexually attractive, etc) + family implant.

Presumably it would work the same for siblings. I would try and find details online appropriately, but imagine the fun when my boss finds out I have been searching google with keyword incest could be fun to see her reaction. And the queue's at the employment agencies *lol*

Oh yeah, and like all things dealing with the human mind, I am sure the above could short out in certain people's heads, so YMMV
#10
Old 03-24-2003, 11:44 AM
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Quote:
Would siblings who have lived separately be more likely to find each other sexually attractive? What about non-biologically related step-siblings?
tehre have been cases where a couple "fell in love" only to find out later they were "long lost siblings" - scary thought
#11
Old 03-24-2003, 11:52 AM
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Well, I certainly don't see anything 'gross' about it. If I had a sister that was attractive, and she was a consenting adult, I'd probably have sex with her or at least try to. So she's a relative- so what?
#12
Old 03-24-2003, 11:56 AM
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(cue the "deliverance" music)
#13
Old 03-24-2003, 11:59 AM
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I never found my sister attractive, but all her friends were hotties, and my buddies seemed to think my sister was hot. She was either the token ugly chick, or was hot. I was never attracted.

You get to see siblings at their ugliest moments.

Where some men may see my sister aglow and dancing through the daisies; I see her as the girl who puked pancakes onto my lap on the family trip to Texas.
#14
Old 03-24-2003, 12:10 PM
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I agree with NurseCarmen:

Once a woman throws up on you, the romance is gone.
#15
Old 03-24-2003, 12:18 PM
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Having fantasies about your sister is creepy. However, having fantasies about her cute little friends is completely normal.
#16
Old 03-24-2003, 12:42 PM
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My sisters were a bit older than I. (5 and 6 years older) So I'm sure they didn't see me in a sexual way but I saw them that way. Actually I didn't understand my feelings till later and actually it was all their fault. (the hussies)

I really remeber seeing my oldest sister completly naked when she was about 16 and I was 9 or 10. It was early morning and she was taking a shower. She opened the bathroom door to put the cat out and she was surrounded by steam with dramatic backlighting. I eyes popped out of my head and I felt 'something'. I wasn't sure what I felt at the time but now I know.

Also in the summertime they were obsessed with getting tans. So who better to be 'lotion boy' than me? Maybe that's why I like coconut so much today.

I don't feel that way now about them but back then from about age 9 to age 16 I felt that way.
#17
Old 03-24-2003, 12:54 PM
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When I was a teenager and my older sister tried on a new bikini, I blurted out "If she wasn't my sister..." I never completed that sentence. That was pretty much an isolated moment. I had a friend who always talked about how hot my sister was. I knew she was attractive, but not really to me. As an adult, I have zero attraction to my sister.
#18
Old 03-24-2003, 01:01 PM
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It's not often I use the word "icky," but I can't think up a word that better describes fantasizing about one's sister.

FTR, I have a sister and, based upon what people say about her and how they act around her, she must be pretty damn good looking. I, however, just don't see it. Maybe it's the incest taboo, or maybe it's just the fact that I've seen her at her very worst. I imagine it's difficult to get aroused by a person after you've seen them with shit leaking out of their diaper, you know? When I think of my sister now, I think of an obnoxious little kid with pimples who I have seen shoot vomit out her nostrils.

Anyway, I'm adopted and my sister is not, so she's "safe" in the biolgical sense. Nonetheless, the idea that Sis is in any way sexy to anybody is just weird. If someone suggested that I look at her in a sexual way, well, like I said, icky.

What will be interesting is how I will react if I ever meet my adult biological sisters (whose existence I only recently discovered). Please, God, don't let them appear attractive to me. My skin will crawl right off and I will die.

Ick.
#19
Old 03-24-2003, 01:04 PM
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I can't speak for others, but I developed a taste in women who had distinctly different features from my sisters. We're all fair blondes, but I go cuckoo for olive-skinned brunettes, Hispanic women, Indian womern, etc. I wonder if that's simply coincidence?
#20
Old 03-24-2003, 01:17 PM
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Surreal, if you had a sister, you'd totally understand why it's just wrong to say you'd want to bang them.

I, too, have a sister that I can't see as attractive. Also, she's not someone I'd want to date anyways as her attitude is quite different from mine. I don't see her for very long times (she lives 1000 kms away) and when she's back I treat her the same. She's only 1 and a half years younger than I am.

I know she's attractive to other guys (asian girls get lots of attention) but I don't like asian women very much and prefer europian / white women. Even if that wasn't the case, sorry, I can't get any wood from thinking of my sister in any sexual context.
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#21
Old 03-24-2003, 02:26 PM
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My sister's a professional actress and is very beautiful. No, I don't find myself attracted to her at all.

Why? I don't know. It's more than conditioning, though - I think we have an instinctive aversion to being attracted to siblings.
#22
Old 03-24-2003, 03:04 PM
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I have a sister. I'm bi, and she's a beautiful young teenager. But, for God's sake, she's my freakin' sister!

It's really hard to be attracted to someone when A.) You still remember when they were four years old, standing on the toilet seat and singing, "toilet seat is my favorite thing." (I taped this for future blackmail purposes) and B.) half the time they annoy the living crap out of you.

Plus, it's just *wrong*. Probably some sort of evolutionary instinct to keep us from inbreeding or something.
#23
Old 03-24-2003, 05:48 PM
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I dont see whats so strange about the topic. Incest leads to inbreeding, therefore there is a VERY strong anti-incest taboo in our mind.

I am not attracted to other men. I dont find that mysterious at all: Homosexuality is evolutionarily useless, so most of us are straight. Simply put, homosexuals do not reproduce and die out. Its the same with incest. Of course, in this age of almost perfect contraceptives, there is no real reason not to commit incest, but, believe me, the natural taboo, along with the social conditioning makes it VERY weird.

Personally, I have an older sister (Im 17, she is 21), and I ve been told that she is pretty. I wouldnt know, I cant even judge her looks as accurately as with other girls... No attraction whatsoever.
#24
Old 03-24-2003, 06:11 PM
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Eh. What can I say? I can (quasi-)objectively see that my sister's pretty hot, but I've never felt the slightest twinge of sexual attraction to her. On the other hand, I'd happily have sex with any of my attractive female friends, regardless how long or how well I've known them. I can't explain why, but being attracted to a "sisterly" friend seems perfectly natural whereas being attracted to my sister just doesn't happen.
#25
Old 03-24-2003, 06:34 PM
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Re: Question For Guys Who Have Attractive Sisters...

Quote:
Originally posted by Surreal
How can you think that someone is attractive and yet not be attracted to them???
I often notice people are attractive without having any sexual desire towards them. This includes both men and women. Assuming you're heterosexual, Surreal, have you ever noticed that someone is beautiful from the same sex as you are ?

I can notice beauty without feeling desire in a lot of things. I mean flowers are beautiful, sunsets are beautiful, people are beautiful, animals are beautiful, but that doesn't mean I feel the urge to bonk senseless every person that is attractive, or that I'm into beastiality or that there is sexual tension between myself and a pot plant ! It is quite possible to notice beauty without wanting to have sex with it
#26
Old 03-24-2003, 06:36 PM
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This is funny for me to read. I have two younger brothers, both very attractive to a variety of women. My younger sister is a very attractive woman herself. I am very close to one of my brothers, my sister's closer to the other one. The one I'm close to - well, all of his girlfriends have been short, petite brunettes. Like me. The other brother goes for tall, busty blondes - like my sister. Neither of my brothers are attracted to me or my sister specifically, but obviously they find in us attractive qualities.

I can objectively see that both of my brothers are good-looking - but I also think a fair number of actors and actresses are good-looking, and I don't really want to sleep with any of them.
#27
Old 03-24-2003, 09:19 PM
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My little (six years younger) sister is a strawberry blonde with hazel eyes and a wonderful face. Her beauty is what I would consider classic. She is also thin, yet curvy, with huge breasts. Unlike me, she has perfect teeth, too. She was a boy magnet all through her high school years.

Guess what? I'm not attracted to her physically, nor can I remember any time in the past when I was.

It's like viewing a painting from one of the masters. You can appreciate the pure human beauty of the woman without needing to feel like you should stick your dick in her.

Looking at old photos of my mom, her sister and my grandmom, I was pleased to see that they were quite lovely women, also.

For most people, note I say "most," the sibling, parent, or other close relation factor removes "sexual" so far away, it isn't even consciously thought of. You don't "repel" from thoughts of sexual attraction to them. It never even enters your mind.

Until someone posts a question like the OP.

As has been said already in this thread, if you had a sibling, you would understand.
#28
Old 03-24-2003, 09:48 PM
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I remember when my sister hit puberty and developed huge breasts, it embarrassed the hell out of her for a while that my brother and I noticed them. It was not so much in a sexual way; they just looked strange, popping out of nowhere. I was only about 6-7 years old at the time, and I thought it was funny to just grab her breasts. This habit was NOT long-lived.

On the few occasions where I saw my sister in a state of dishabille I did have a mental reaction, but not a physical one. But I was pretty well-educated about the basic mechanics and psychology of sex at a quite young age, so I never felt guilty about it, nor did I let the thoughts linger. I've never found my sister at all physically attractive, and now that we're adults, I don't even like her personality.

I have cousins who married some damn gorgeous women though. I lusted after them with no remorse at all.
#29
Old 03-25-2003, 02:45 AM
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Esquire magazine a few years ago had an article about an incest case prosecuted in Wisconsin, a rare legal occurrence. The brother and sister had been raised separately due to divorce, and the lack of "conditioning" that deglamorizes your siblings as you grow up may have contributed to their attraction when they met up as adults. What led to their prosecution and imprisonment was their having two children together. Ya, I know, ick.
#30
Old 03-25-2003, 11:38 AM
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Old, mean joke

Why does nobody want to marry a virgin in (name of State where incest is common?)

If she ain't good enough for family, she ain't good enough for me!
#31
Old 03-25-2003, 03:23 PM
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Both my sisters are what different demographic groups in this country would consider attractive. I have never thought more than "oh, she looks like her friend who's hot, so I guess by association ... but no, nevermind, she's my sister" about them.

Part of it is that they annoy the faaaack out of me, part of it is just that I've gotten used to them, and part is just this sense that it'd be icky.

Interestingly enough, my brother, it seems, is developing into the sort of person people will probably lust after. He's still my little annoying brother to me, though. That'll change ... someday.

My *cousin*, OTOH...
#32
Old 03-25-2003, 03:48 PM
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I often wonder. With the orgasm and procreation increasingly becoming two seperate goals of sex whether that has led to an increase in incest and if it hasn't whether that was because other factors of "liberation" were at work decreasing the likelyhood of it. What's weird is if you imagine what the world will be like 50 years into the future and let logic fully slide down any and all slippery slope arguments you can come to some very bizarre outcomes. "I'll just cut a hole in the watermelon, a little lubrication and voila!"


Hmm, anyway I also have a sister and a mother, both of whom are very pretty, about whom I've never thought about in a sexual manner. Just never crossed my mind. I did have a very weird dream about my mother once though which made me feel very icky for a day but that just reinforced the ick factor. So here's another post to say "Youjust don't think about it."
#33
Old 03-25-2003, 03:54 PM
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I was kinda on the fence about this one, until I read Zebra's post, and felt a-stirrin'. But I don't have a sister, so I'll never know for sure.

I did sleep with my girlfriends mother once, does that count?
#34
Old 03-25-2003, 03:59 PM
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I'm three years older than my sister and I think she's become pretty, and I'm happy for her. I'm not attracted to her at all, and I would even say I get bothered when my friends make comments about her. I'm very protective with her to the point that I have wanted to do bodily harm to people that have said things about her to me. She's my younger sister and that's the way I still think of her. I have no problem with her boyfriend that is the same age as her, but I get mad if someone older around my age says something.

by RickJay
Quote:
Why? I don't know. It's more than conditioning, though - I think we have an instinctive aversion to being attracted to siblings.
I don't know about that. I remember an article in Sports Illustrated a couple years ago about Terrell Owens. He lived in a small town with his grandma (?) in, I think, Mississippi. He started to get a crush on a girl in the neighborhood. It turned out that she was his half-sister and he never knew. He didn't find out until I wasn't allowed to see hang out with her anymore. He was young at the time though, so who knows.
#35
Old 03-25-2003, 04:12 PM
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Once, when I was around 14, I fell sick and became very congested. That evening, my mother came into my room and started rubbing Vicks VapoRub on my chest.

My body 'reacted' to the sensation.
#36
Old 03-25-2003, 04:29 PM
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In biology, there is something called the Westermark Effect which suggests that there is an aversion to sexual contact between people raised in the same household before the age of six.

The support I have for this is a bit dated (the individual studes come from J. Patrick Gray's Primate Sociobiology [1985]) but seem to be pretty conclusive. FTR, I am not a biologist.

In any case, the studies' findings are based on marriage patterns, sexual activity, and reproductive rates of non-related children raised in the same household. They each found that for individuals from the same group, there tends to be less sexual interaction, higher rates of divorce for those that do marry, and lower rates of reproductive success.

Interestingly enough, if the Westermark Effect does provide a biological basis for some kind of incest taboo, it would suggest that it isn't the fact that she's your sister that makes her unattractive but, rather, that you were simply raised in the same household.
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#37
Old 03-25-2003, 04:31 PM
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Oops. Make that the Westermarck Effect.
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#38
Old 03-25-2003, 05:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Surreal
Once, when I was around 14...
When you're 14, your dick gets hard when a car drives by or the neighbor's dog barks. Doesn't mean you want to nail Fido in the back seat of the Camry.
#39
Old 03-25-2003, 05:27 PM
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Incest: Fun The Whole Family!

Quote:
Originally posted by Surreal
I've heard that, Kalhoun, but I just don't buy it.

Why is it 'weird' to be sexually attracted to someone who's sexually attractive?
Well, Surreal...you sure live up your nom de plume! You must be surreal to think this isn't weird! Well, you know what they say...incest is best! It's a game the whole family can play...

Hey, maybe we should start a thread about incest jokes!

Whatever you do, Surreal...stay away from my sister!
- Jinx
#40
Old 03-27-2003, 11:46 AM
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Looking at the stories related here, I'm wondering how much of the aversion is because they're your siblings, and how much because you've just been around them so much and seen them in such unflattering ways, that it just washes out any attractivness. I also am without a sister, so I don't know what it's truely like, but I see an awful lot of the "watched her/him puke/look lousy/irritate the hell out of me" comments here, as well as the "it's just wrong, they're my sister/brother".
#41
Old 03-27-2003, 11:57 AM
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Re: Incest: Fun The Whole Family!

Quote:
Originally posted by Jinx


Whatever you do, Surreal...stay away from my sister!
- Jinx
I think you mean Whatever you do, Surreal...stay away from YOUR sister!


What gets me is that I KNOW these guys who wouldn't touch or think of their sister all have the hot twins fantasy. You think some girl would do you and her sister at the same time but you won't think of your sister in that way.
#42
Old 03-27-2003, 12:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Cervaise
When you're 14, your dick gets hard when a car drives by or the neighbor's dog barks. Doesn't mean you want to nail Fido in the back seat of the Camry.
Huh. Shows what you know...
#43
Old 03-27-2003, 01:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Walloon
Ya, I know, ick.
I donít know about ďickĒ. It sounds more tragic than icky to me. Itís definitely unfortunate about the kids if any genetic yuckiness has gone on with them, and it was certainly selfish of the parents to risk their children's health in that way, but overall I think itís sad as opposed to gross. For anyone who has a SO, imagine if tomorrow someone informed you that he/she is your sibling, and thatís it, you canít be with that person anymore. Can you imagine? I donít know if I would be able to end the relationship Iím in based on that info, I am just too in love to really give a crap.

I think I have to agree with Surreal here, to a degree. Sure, thereís the genetics issue, but if you remove the idea that the only reason to be in a relationship is to procreate, then why should we not support and encourage a brother and sister in love just as we would any other couple? I know lots of committed couples who have no desire to have kids, and in several of those cases have taken permanent precautions against the possibility. Nobody looks down on them or thinks theyíre gross, so why should it be any different if one of those couples who will never reproduce happens to be siblings?

I know nobody has really said they have a problem with others doing it, just that they themselves donít find it an attractive prospect, but it seems like most people (I mean in general, not specifically anyone here or anything) think itís disgusting, and I donít really get that. No, I personally am not attracted to my own sibling, but as far as I can see, two adults in mutual agreement ought to be able to do anything they want to do, so long as nobody is getting hurt.
#44
Old 03-27-2003, 02:09 PM
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I am uneffected by the incest taboo. I've got two sisters, and would have sex with either of them. But I also have a very casual attitude about sex in general.
I almost got a chance to have a pair of sisters, but could never get them both drunk enough at the same time, oh well. >
#45
Old 03-27-2003, 02:20 PM
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It's funny how people always talk about how important it is for couples to 'have a lot in common', but in cases where they really *do* have a lot in common, such as growing up in the same house together or sharing the same parents, everyone's opinion changes all of the sudden. Interesting.
#46
Old 03-27-2003, 04:05 PM
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My very attractive younger sister was two years behind me throughout school. I must say we each got a great deal of sexual gratification out of the setup. BUT: It came from her fixing me up with her friends and me returning the favor to her with my friends.

The thought of any sort of physical relationship with her never entered my head, and I'm quite sure it never entered hers either.

If anyone would like to see the subject dealt with in an interesting manner, check out the following good movie: Lone Star (1996) with Elizabeth Pena and Kris Kristofferson.

Surreal: I think you should check out Ol'Gaffer's first post very closely. It explains what you seem to be having such a difficult time grasping.

Not wanting to have a physical relationship with your sister isn't a deliberate decision one makes. You simply Don't Want To Do Her. Since you don't have a sister yourself, you're going to have to take what those of us that do have sisters say at face value, or check out research similar to what that O'l Gaffer cited.
#47
Old 03-27-2003, 04:46 PM
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Thanks.

I read Ol'Gaffer's post and the possibility of a 'Westermarck Effect' seems to make sense, but the problem then is how do you explain the experiences of NotBob13, Zebra, AHunter3, and Arcite?
#48
Old 03-27-2003, 05:08 PM
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Re: Re: Incest: Fun The Whole Family!

Quote:
Originally posted by Zebra
What gets me is that I KNOW these guys who wouldn't touch or think of their sister all have the hot twins fantasy. You think some girl would do you and her sister at the same time but you won't think of your sister in that way.
I know a guy who once told me he lived out this fantasy. He found it better then a usual menage et tois (however you spell it) becuse they refused to touch each other, and could devote all their attention to him.

That said, I can see how girls find my brother attractive. He is kinda good looking in a tall dark and handsome way, has his own car and has some spending cash. All good things for a 16 year old in the dating game. I'd never think of doing anything with him though because.. well like it's been said. The idea is icky to me, that and I remember the brat I beat half to death a few times. (Well not literally but you get the idea) One of his friends on the other hand.. wowza. I'd jump him in an instant if he weren't four years younger and already dating someone.

And I have found at least one of my cousins attractive. (Well second cousin.. son of my Dad's cousin) He's pretty hot but I only see him once every few years. It was weird at the family get together. I met a number of cute guys, most of which were related to me slightly. Except for the son of my Great Grandma's friend.. but I didn't find out he wasn't related until after the dinner (when we had everyone who was related and descended from each of Great Grandma's children stand up) and by then it was too late cuz he took off right away.
#49
Old 03-27-2003, 07:15 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: North Carolina, USA
Posts: 3,030
My brother's a definite cutie. I'd probably be attracted to him if he weren't my brother. But as his sister, I've just never been attracted to him. I don't know why; it's just never been an issue.
#50
Old 03-28-2003, 01:19 AM
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Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 9,335
Quote:
Originally posted by Walloon
Esquire magazine a few years ago had an article about an incest case prosecuted in Wisconsin, a rare legal occurrence. The brother and sister had been raised separately due to divorce, and the lack of "conditioning" that deglamorizes your siblings as you grow up may have contributed to their attraction when they met up as adults. What led to their prosecution and imprisonment was their having two children together. Ya, I know, ick.
I'll repost what I wrote in a much older thread.

I'm adopted. My birth mother and I recently found each other. A few years after I was born, she married my birth father. They had more kids -- two sons and a daughter. I have blood siblings that I never knew about until about eight months ago.

I've got pictures of the entire gang, my lost family. My biological sister is "hot"; we're talking a popular kid in high school who was almost prom queen. (My biological mother is also very attractive. Gee, Mom, thanks for not passing those genes down to me. ) Anyhow, some long-dormant instinct kicked in, making it nearly impossible to see my biological sister in a sexual manner. I just can't. I see many of my features in her face, reinforcing that "dear sweet Lord, no way" mindset.
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