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#1
Old 01-30-2007, 03:15 PM
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Fleet's Phosphosoda (TMI)

I can deal with the anxiety of being 28 years old and having to go get a colonoscopy.

I can deal with the humiliation of having air pumped up my colon and foreign objects shoved up my ass.

I can deal with the annoyance of not being able to eat anything but lime Jello and chicken broth for a day.

I can even handle shooting great gouts of ballistic feces water out of my ass thanks to the megaton bomb of OTC laxatives.

But why, oh why, does this stuff have to taste like a cross between furniture polish, the waste water at a condom factory, and Dick Cheney's salty crotch?

And the new lemon-ginger "flavor" is supposed to taste better?

And I've got to take another dose of this in a couple of hours?

This sucks. Suuuuuucks. Ew.
#2
Old 01-30-2007, 03:17 PM
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How do you know what Dick Cheney's salty crotch tastes like?
#3
Old 01-30-2007, 03:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Uvula Donor
How do you know what Dick Cheney's salty crotch tastes like?
Please do not answer this question.
#4
Old 01-30-2007, 03:27 PM
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It's pretty nasty, alright. Back in the day when I was told I had acute renal failure and had to prep for tests, they made me drink some fizzy strawberry pop tastin' stuff. Much better than the evil lemon ginger.

Turned out they made a mistake on their end. Kidneys are fine, thank you.
#5
Old 01-30-2007, 03:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Uvula Donor
How do you know what Dick Cheney's salty crotch tastes like?
What, he's never teabagged you before? He does it to people all the time at parties.

Last edited by black rabbit; 01-30-2007 at 03:58 PM.
#6
Old 01-30-2007, 04:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by black rabbit
What, he's never teabagged you before? He does it to people all the time at parties.
Note to self: avoid black rabbit's parties at all costs.
Oh, wait, did you mean the Republican Party?
#7
Old 01-30-2007, 04:51 PM
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You think that's bad, try a epsom salt laxative sometime. You'll never complain about the lemon ginger again.
#8
Old 01-30-2007, 05:10 PM
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You're supposed to dissolve it in a highly sugarted clear liquid

I dissolve mine in Sprite or Slice. Not to say I do this all the time, but I have had a couple of these procedures in the past 5 years or so, so I have had to do it.

Hopefully the colonoscopy will reveal that all is well and you just need more fiber.
#9
Old 01-30-2007, 05:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crazyjoe
You're supposed to dissolve it in a highly sugarted clear liquid

I dissolve mine in Sprite or Slice. Not to say I do this all the time, but I have had a couple of these procedures in the past 5 years or so, so I have had to do it.

Hopefully the colonoscopy will reveal that all is well and you just need more fiber.
I was told to put it in apple juice, but it was still detectable.
#10
Old 01-30-2007, 05:22 PM
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Well, it's going to be detectable no matter what liquid you put it into, because it's basically a kind of salt water, and salt water is going to affect the taste of any beverage, except maybe moonshine fresh out of the still.

Whatever you do, don't put it in Gatorade. [insert Mr. Yuk emoticon]

It tastes marginally better if it's cold.
But not by much.
Lots of 7-up or Sprite, yeah, works well. And "well" here is a word which means, "Not as bad as Gatorade".
#11
Old 01-30-2007, 05:40 PM
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Phosphosoda is the Shiznitz!
Quote:
170 patients were randomized to 3 groups. Group 1 prepared with sodium phosphate solution, Group 2 with PEG, Group 3 with a senna solution.

When asked if they would like the same method of preparation again, more patients in the sodium phosphate group said yes (59%). The fewest senna-prepared patients agreed (6.8%).
#12
Old 01-30-2007, 06:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duck Duck Goose
It tastes marginally better if it's cold.
But not by much.
Lots of 7-up or Sprite, yeah, works well. And "well" here is a word which means, "Not as bad as Gatorade".
When I was in the hospital, it was presented to me in a chlly Sprite bottle with condensation on the side and a cute straw in the bottle. Presentation is everything.

Still tasted like gutter water.
#13
Old 01-30-2007, 06:27 PM
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I'm assuming this Phosphosoda is somehow different than the freakin' gigantic tub of Colytely I had to drink before my colonoscopy? ::stops, looks up Phosphosoda on the internet:: Wait a second, how many doses of this stuff do you have to take, one or two? Try an 8-oz glass of Dick Cheney ball sweat every 15 minutes until you've drank four liters of the stuff. That's the Colytely regimen. Boohoo, cry more, noob. ::is still bitter::

Sorry. I don't know if it works for a sparkly-type ball sweat, but I found that chugging my Colytely worked best. Just glugging it down as quickly as possible each time.
#14
Old 01-30-2007, 07:01 PM
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Yeah, I just slugged my bottles in one gulp, chased by a 24oz glass of water. I figured mixing it in anything would just be prolonging the grodiness.

On the upside, I can finally realize my dream of doing a Tubgirl impression.
#15
Old 01-30-2007, 07:26 PM
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I've been through this and agree, Fleet's phosphasux.
#16
Old 01-30-2007, 07:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by black rabbit
Yeah, I just slugged my bottles in one gulp, chased by a 24oz glass of water. I figured mixing it in anything would just be prolonging the grodiness.

On the upside, I can finally realize my dream of doing a Tubgirl impression.
Bad thought! Bad thought!

*covers ears with hands and starts lalalalalalalalalalala*
#17
Old 01-30-2007, 07:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by black rabbit
What, he's never teabagged you before?
Teabagged? No, can't say as I've experienced that. 'Course, not so's I'd noticed, considering I've been getting ass-raped by the whole lot of them for the last several years. That there, that's got a salty taste, yessir.
#18
Old 01-30-2007, 08:20 PM
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As liscurl noted, Golytely is lots worse. Not quite as nasty tasting as phosphosoda, but you have to drink a frickin' gallon of it!!
#19
Old 01-30-2007, 10:37 PM
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Heh. We do barium enemas darn near every day, and before we begin, we always have to ask the patient if they think that their "prep was effective" -- in other words, are they cleaned out?

The greatest percentage answer in the affirmative enthusiastically.

Some of them are pretty funny. One curmudgeonly ol' coot said, "I think I blew my asshole off about 1:30 this morning."

I wish I could remember some more of their exact quotes. I've got to start writing them down.
#20
Old 01-30-2007, 10:47 PM
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My husband had hemorrhoid surgery Friday. He was complaining about his liquid diet and the cleaning out solution. I've had a couple of those cleaning out solutions myself. They taste like poison, which is I suppose what they are, in a way.

Right now, Bill is WISHING that the only thing bothering him was the taste of that solution. His gut is working again, and moving food down the old chute. He wants morphine, but I'm not about to give it to him.
#21
Old 01-31-2007, 02:24 AM
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This was my daughter's Thanksgiving dinner the year before last. She was in hospital being prepped for a colonoscopy the next day to determine whether she had Chron's or ulcerative colitis (turned out to be the latter). It didn't help that three different doctors had missed the diagnosis during the previous month, so by that time she couldn't keep anything down under the best of circumstances. It took several hours to get the requisite amount into her system, and I found out just how inventive her vocabulary had become.

(As it happened, neither steroids nor immunosuppressives did the job, so she had to have another colonoscopy the day after her 16th birthday. This time, though, they used a nasal tube; made a world of difference.)
#22
Old 01-31-2007, 08:41 AM
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When I had my first colonoscopy at age 16 in 1986, I had to drink a GALLON of Go-lytely (sp?). It tasted like saltwater. I never even liked to drink 8 ounces of water at a time, much less a whole gallon of saltwater!

After 20 years of having Ulcerative Colitis, I now have to do this every year. I skipped last year because I was pregnant. Thank you, Susie!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Duck Duck Goose
Whatever you do, don't put it in Gatorade. [insert Mr. Yuk emoticon]
No shit! That was retched!
#23
Old 01-31-2007, 08:57 AM
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Bolding mine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nutty Bunny
When I had my first colonoscopy at age 16 in 1986, I had to drink a GALLON of Go-lytely (sp?). It tasted like saltwater. I never even liked to drink 8 ounces of water at a time, much less a whole gallon of saltwater!

After 20 years of having Ulcerative Colitis, I now have to do this every year. I skipped last year because I was pregnant. Thank you, Susie!
I wasn't clear. I have to have a colonscopy every year, not drink Go-lytely as a prep.
#24
Old 01-31-2007, 10:04 AM
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As another person who suffers from UC, I need to stress a couple things about the phospho-soda. 1) Get it as cold as you can, this really helps with the taste.
2) Dissolve it in the strongest tasting stuff you can find that still conforms to the doc's instructions.

Oh, and if your insurance covers it, REMICADE is a wonderful treatment for UC if nothing else is working. every 8 weeks you get an IV infusion, and that's it.
#25
Old 01-31-2007, 10:11 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Qadgop the Mercotan
As liscurl noted, Golytely is lots worse. Not quite as nasty tasting as phosphosoda, but you have to drink a frickin' gallon of it!!
It sure works though, making you clean as a whistle. I tried to fart and suddenly every dog in the neighborhood came running.
#26
Old 01-31-2007, 10:22 AM
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Another vote for chugging chilled phosphosoda as fast as possible, chased by something really, really sweet to wash away as much of the taste as possible.

By the time I'd finished my prep, not only was I completely cleared out, but I'd developed a loathing of beef and chicken broth.
#27
Old 01-31-2007, 10:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lieu
I tried to fart and suddenly every dog in the neighborhood came running.
I can do that anyway, if I clench tight enough.

Last edited by Uvula Donor; 01-31-2007 at 10:33 AM.
#28
Old 01-31-2007, 10:35 AM
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This is a little late now, but don't mix that stuff with something you like to drink on a regular basis.

It's been about six years, and I still can not stand the thought of Sprite/7-Up/Mountain Dew.
#29
Old 01-31-2007, 11:07 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lieu
It sure works though, making you clean as a whistle. I tried to fart and suddenly every dog in the neighborhood came running.
Why is it I can now hear DeForrest Kelly shouting, "Lock-and-Load, Jim...!"
#30
Old 01-31-2007, 01:49 PM
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black rabbit, if you have the need I'd like to pass onto you something which I won but fortunately have not needed. If Rysdad is in agreement I'd be more than willing to allow you to recieve this generous prize.
#31
Old 01-31-2007, 06:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crazyjoe
Oh, and if your insurance covers it, REMICADE is a wonderful treatment for UC if nothing else is working. every 8 weeks you get an IV infusion, and that's it.
Great drug, when it works. But it doesn't work for everybody.

I've had a few patients with such severe inflammatory bowel disease that they finally had total colectomies, and ended up grateful to have had them. Even the ones that needed colostomies.

Nasty disease, all too often. Fortunately there's more therapies to try, to get it quieted down, then there used to be.

My youngest has had to have waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many courses of go-lytely in her lifetime. She'd love to need that stuff only once a year.
#32
Old 01-31-2007, 06:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GawnFishin'
black rabbit, if you have the need I'd like to pass onto you something which I won but fortunately have not needed. If Rysdad is in agreement I'd be more than willing to allow you to recieve this generous prize.


As we say in Fluoroscopic Radiology....

Line 'em up,
Plug 'em up,
Fill 'em up,
Shoot 'em!
#33
Old 01-31-2007, 07:02 PM
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I tried to add this using the Edit function, but I must be typing too slowly today...

An additional note...

Our staff radiologists don't allow our patients to use GoLytlely as an enema prep. It's OK for a CT-scan prep in order for the colon to be empty, but they don't like it for an enema prep because it leaves the colon too "slimy" for the barium to adhere well.

I dunno...each Radiologist has his or her own preferences, I guess.

Heh. Isn't a slimy colon a nice mental image?
#34
Old 01-31-2007, 07:07 PM
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When I had my run through with navy radiology [i swear, they used every piece of diagnostic equipment they owned just to give the radiology techs practice] I was given some 'liquiprep kit' that was a small 8 oz bottle of lemon lime crud [i did it as a single shooter to get it down fast] and 4 small red pills, that i was told to do at teh same time.

I crapped my brains out all freaking week. I did it sunday, had radiology monday and was scheduled for surgery for friday. Thursday came around and I was told to come in at noon so they could type and cross match me for the vampires, and to have some little discussion between the anesthetologist and myself. Despite continuing to drink my normal gallon of water a day I was so dehydrated they couldnt tap any blood out of me until on the 14th stick [between my freaking toes - that hurt like a motherfucker.] I was crapping STILL from the damned prep kit. Every hour on the hour, day and night. I was so damned cranky by thursday I changed my mind and told Doc Green that I wanted to be ubder totally instead of awake and kibbitzing like when I had my tubal ligation. I just wanted to get more than an hour of sleep in a row.

Never again will I do the 4 damned pills ... just the drink works for me.
#35
Old 01-31-2007, 07:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aruvqan
Never again will I do the 4 damned pills ... just the drink works for me.
Our prep includes the powder to mix and drink, the four pills, and, to top it all off, a suppository.

Next, we'll add 20 minutes on the business end of a Shop Vac.
#36
Old 01-31-2007, 07:32 PM
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Why can't thet clean you out from the other end using an ennima? Wouldn't that be less unpleasent?
#37
Old 01-31-2007, 07:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bippy the Beardless
Why can't thet clean you out from the other end using an ennima? Wouldn't that be less unpleasent?
Unfortunately, that doesn't clean out the entire colon, nor does it do it that well.

You need to be "squeeky clean" because, when they fill you up with barium, any remaining 'material' might look like what the docs call a "filling defect"---in other words, a mass (or tumor), or a number of other things. Further, any 'leftovers' may obscure something that might be important to find.
#38
Old 01-31-2007, 08:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Qadgop the Mercotan
Great drug, when it works. But it doesn't work for everybody.

I've had a few patients with such severe inflammatory bowel disease that they finally had total colectomies, and ended up grateful to have had them. Even the ones that needed colostomies.

Nasty disease, all too often. Fortunately there's more therapies to try, to get it quieted down, then there used to be.

My youngest has had to have waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many courses of go-lytely in her lifetime. She'd love to need that stuff only once a year.
That's what happened to my daughter. The first round or Remicade seemed to work (it's a strange experience to burst into tears when the phone rings and you hear "Dad! Guess what! I had a piece of toast!"), but the uc came back worse than before. Fortunately, she's young enough that a j-pouch was an option, so she was a "bag lady" for less than a year.
#39
Old 02-01-2007, 11:34 AM
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Indeed I am very thankful that the Remicade is working, because I have topped out on the other medications. My purpose is to postpone surgery as long as is possible, as I would like to keep my body as it was originally designed for as long as possible.

It is very nice to be normal again.
#40
Old 02-01-2007, 08:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Qadgop the Mercotan
As liscurl noted, Golytely is lots worse. Not quite as nasty tasting as phosphosoda, but you have to drink a frickin' gallon of it!!
Oh yeah. Been there, done that. Twice, so far. (My mom died of colon cancer, so I get checked.) I also have to worry about reflux when my stomach gets really full. Double yuck.
#41
Old 02-01-2007, 10:51 PM
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I have UC...I have learned how to control it with some over-the-counter homeopathic stuff, but I realize it varies in severity from person-to-person. QtM may have something to say about this, but my personal experience is that my UC is based in some bad flora in my gut.
My UC started a month or so after a course of Zithromax when I was 27 (nearly 11 years ago). I'm not sure of how much of what I'm about to say would hold up under medical and scientific scrutiny, but here's what I'm GUESSING happened:
The Zithromax wiped out a certain strain of bacteria in my large intestine. This allowed a particularly nasty strain to thrive, especially in the presence of sugars that weren't digesting well (again, possibly due to some other flora in my gut not being there in sufficient quantities anymore to process sugars correctly). These "bad" flora THRIVED on the sugars that weren't being processed higher up in my system, and I wound up with a super-colony of these buggers. Because these buggers were over-active, my immune system kicked in and tried to do something about it, but instead started attacking the lining of my colon (why it got "confused" I'm not sure). PRESTO! Ulcerative Colitis...
I was on a "traditional" treatment of prednisone and colazal and imuran for years trying to keep it under control, with varying success and varying doses of prednisone (at one point I was on 40mg/day for nearly 4 years). Eventually, I started some research on my own looked into some homeopathic stuff. I was desperate, since I traveled for a living, and airports and airplanes and all of the times when a bathroom was not convenient were starting to take their toll. First, I tried an aloe mucilaginous polysaccharide. I had immediate success with this at first, getting my diarrhea under control, then the bleeding and cramping stopped, and I was down to a reasonable number of trips to the bathroom each day (3 or 4). This lasted for about 6 months, and then I had a flareup again, and it came back with a vengeance. It was during this time that I was on the high dose of prednisone for 4 years.
Eventually, I came across another source that indicated that I needed to get my digestive system back in check, and that the UC would start to take care of itself. I started taking a digestive enzyme supplement with every meal, and almost completely eliminated corn syrup and corn sweeteners from my diet (i.e., sodas and colas). I also made a point of eating at least one active-culture yogurt each week in the form of a fruit smoothie I made in the blender. I started this regimen over two years ago, and within 2 weeks after starting, I was in nearly complete remission of my UC. Today, I can eat pretty much anything I want, including nuts and fruits and vegetables, popcorn (in moderation) and even a few sodas a week, as long as I stick with my digestive enzymes with every meal. If I get short of enzymes or I overdo the sugars, then I have a diarrhea attack, but I haven't had blood in nearly 20 months, I have normal trips to the bathroom, and I haven't taken prednisone in over a year.
YMMV of course, but this worked very well for me. I realize my cause/effect is anecdotal, but I've read and heard enough other similar cases that I think there might be something to it...
Quadgop, I respect your opinion, and please feel free to chime in - I merely wanted to relate my own personal experience...
#42
Old 02-02-2007, 03:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lieu
It sure works though, making you clean as a whistle. I tried to fart and suddenly every dog in the neighborhood came running.
Did you squeek when you walked?
#43
Old 02-03-2007, 12:03 AM
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Just to chime in on what to mix Fleet's PhosphoSoda in...

I took care of a 6 year old boy in the hospital, who had to have a bowel prep for surgery. I had to give him that shit, and he cried because it tasted so bad and wouldn't take it. I tried mixing it in several things (pop, juice), nothing worked. On a whim I tried cranberry juice (the cocktail stuff). I even tasted it myself. It really covered up the taste. It was just the slightest bit salty. The little boy drank it up without a problem. Success!
#44
Old 02-03-2007, 01:31 AM
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When my girlfriend had to take a recent colonoscopy prep, her doc advised her against mixing the prep with anything with red dye... so no red or purple drinks. He said that the red dye can cause problems reading the results. Is that true?
#45
Old 02-03-2007, 01:40 AM
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They also caution against strawberry or cherry jello... both red as well. I guess their reasoning is that if you want them to give you an accurate assessment of your colon's health, it's best not to arrive with it looking bloody as that of a stuck pig.
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