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FoieGrasIsEvil
07-14-2012, 04:38 PM
I was listening to a bit of the Reds game on the way to pick up my sons from their Mom. Chris Welsh was calling the game. Kyle Loshe was pitching for the Cardinals and Welsh says this about him: "Loshe works really quickly out there. He's on the first day side of forever."

Now I know that isn't much but I thought it was pretty funny. What other sayings does your favorite announcer use, or have you heard someone say something mildly entertaining/classic/really annoying?

All time favorite though, is Marty Brennaman "And this one belongs to the Reds!"

Musicat
07-14-2012, 04:52 PM
If they say, "Gooooooaaaaallll!!!" in soccer, why don't they say "Hooooommmmme!" in baseball?

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-14-2012, 05:04 PM
If they say, "Gooooooaaaaallll!!!" in soccer, why don't they say "Hooooommmmme!" in baseball?

Ha ha. Baseball, due to the way the game is structured and its unique pacing, which some think is boring, lends itself very well to radio, and there are so many unique personalities that have developed over the years that have said some pretty unique and crazy things.

I want to hear your faves.

needscoffee
07-14-2012, 05:42 PM
"There's no crying in baseball!"

zoid
07-14-2012, 06:06 PM
If they say, "Gooooooaaaaallll!!!" in soccer, why don't they say "Hooooommmmme!" in baseball?

Because we have (had)
HOOO-LEEE-COW!

and

You can put it on the BOOOARD - YES!

It is the shame of baseball that these are not the default phrases for the respective leagues.

Munch
07-14-2012, 06:08 PM
You can put it on the BOOOARD - YES!

It is the shame of baseball that these are not the default phrases for the respective leagues.
"Put it on the board..." is the single worst baseball catch phrase of all time. All White Sox fans should be publicly shamed for being inspired, rather than humiliated, every time it is uttered.

zoid
07-14-2012, 06:11 PM
"Put it on the board..." is the single worst baseball catch phrase of all time. All White Sox fans should be publicly shamed for being inspired, rather than humiliated, every time it is uttered.

You good Sir are mistaken. While I will defend you're right to your opinion I must point out it is nonsense.

Fear Itself
07-14-2012, 06:33 PM
Willie Stargell once said about Phil Niekro's knuckleball, "It's like trying to hit a butterfly with hiccups".

RealityChuck
07-14-2012, 06:52 PM
"The California Angels are like Kleenex. They pop up one at a time." - Pat Buttram

Sternvogel
07-14-2012, 10:28 PM
After a spectacular 1977 season as a reliever for the New York Yankees, Sparky Lyle saw his role diminish when the team signed Goose Gossage for the 1978 campaign. Referring to Lyle's sudden descent from winning the award for the league's best pitcher to becoming expendable, teammate Graig Nettles quipped that Sparky "went from Cy Young to sayonara."

RadicalPi
07-14-2012, 10:58 PM
"He's on the first day side of forever."

I'm not sure what this means?

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-14-2012, 11:25 PM
I'm not sure what this means?

Some pitchers take "forever" to get their shit together, apparently Loshe pitches rather quickly.

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-14-2012, 11:26 PM
Willie Stargell once said about Phil Niekro's knuckleball, "It's like trying to hit a butterfly with hiccups".

Exactly what I am looking for! C'mon people!

Bullitt
07-14-2012, 11:39 PM
A few years back the SF Giants had Edgardo Alfonso on their roster, and the KNBR radio team (Duane Kuiper, Mike Krukow, John Miller, David Fleming) eventually took to referring to him as Ed-wierdo El-fungo. Nothing against Alfonso, it's just that they sometimes stumbled on his name and the alternate name came more naturally.

denquixote
07-14-2012, 11:59 PM
Bob Prince the one-time Pirate announcer had a number of pet phrases, one of which he would utter after a particularly hard fought game, the outcome of which was always in doubt: "We had 'em all the way." It was particularly appropriate after the 7th game of the 1969 World Series.

Bob Veale, a former Pirate pitcher, (and others) are credited with saying "Good pitching will beat good hitting every time, and vice versa."

I have heard announcer say, after a batter has finally raised his batting average over .200:
:Well he finally got off the interstate." (That is there is no longer a 1 starting his average as in I-95")

The Other Jeffrey Lebowski
07-15-2012, 05:11 AM
Exactly what I am looking for! C'mon people!
Well if we can include comments from players, there's a treasure trove from Lawrence Berra that can be mined, but I'd like to offer one from the pinstripe quipster that I grew up with:

Pitching is 80% of the game and the other half is hitting and fielding. - Mickey Rivers

And I just found this (http://aarp.org/entertainment/arts-leisure/info-03-2011/baseball-quotes.html), which has some real gems.

There have been only two authentic geniuses in the world, Willie Mays and Willie Shakespeare. Tallulah Bankhead

Trying to sneak a pitch past Hank Aaron is like trying to sneak the sunrise past a rooster. Joe Adcock

We know we're better than this, but we can't prove it. Tony Gwynn

There ain't much to being a ballplayer, if you're a ballplayer. Honus Wagner

Fear Itself
07-15-2012, 06:58 AM
Vin Scully, the venerable voice of the LA Dodgers, is a font of baseball color:"Bud Black is out to argue and to calm down his pitcher. The Dodgers have already stolen his wallet and are working on his watch."

"That thing died of exhaustion on the way to short. I mean, you could lose a poodle in that stuff."

"Juan Pierre is going steady with the left field pole."

"Rowand fought the wall, and the wall won."

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-15-2012, 07:13 AM
Well if we can include comments from players, there's a treasure trove from Lawrence Berra that can be mined, but I'd like to offer one from the pinstripe quipster that I grew up with:

Pitching is 80% of the game and the other half is hitting and fielding. - Mickey Rivers

And I just found this (http://aarp.org/entertainment/arts-leisure/info-03-2011/baseball-quotes.html), which has some real gems.

I love the quote about Hank Aaron...and the one from Gwynn...nice!

Vin Scully, the venerable voice of the LA Dodgers, is a font of baseball color:

Good Lord those are hysterical.

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-15-2012, 07:18 AM
From Lebowski's list:

12. Bob Gibson is the luckiest pitcher I ever saw. He always pitches when the other team doesn't score any runs. Tim McCarver

21. After Jackie Robinson, the most important black in baseball history is Reggie Jackson. Reggie Jackson

42. A man once told me to walk with the Lord. I'd rather walk with the bases loaded. Ken Singleton

Oh, Pete.

43. I'd be willing to bet you, if I was a betting man, that I have never bet on baseball. Pete Rose

35. The way to catch a knuckleball is to wait until the ball stops rolling and then to pick it up. Bob Uecker

denquixote
07-15-2012, 10:32 AM
Maybe someone else knows who said this one, referring to a failed base stealer: "He had larceny in his heart but his feet were honest."

Esox Lucius
07-15-2012, 02:13 PM
"You're out and you're ugly, too!" -- title of a book by umpire Durwood Merrill. I don't know if he ever said it in a game, but I love it.

Another from Berra: Yankee Stadium is (or was) oriented so that shadows from the stands started falling across the infield in the late innings of day games, prompting Berra to say, "It gets late early in Yankee Stadium".

Munch
07-15-2012, 02:30 PM
"I couldn't see well enough to play when I was a boy, so they gave me a special job - they made me an umpire."

-- Harry S Truman

Ponch8
07-15-2012, 02:54 PM
Whenever the Cubs were threatening to score but the next batter killed the rally by popping out, Harry Caray would say, "PAAAAAAHPPED it up!"

etv78
07-15-2012, 03:01 PM
I'd attribute the Schulz quote to Lucy Van Pelt.

Jeff Lichtman
07-18-2012, 02:28 AM
Dan Quisenberry was one of the most quotable people ever in sports:

"A manager uses a relief pitcher like a six shooter, he fires until it's empty then takes the gun and throws it at the villain."

About Ted Simmons: "He didn't sound like a baseball player. He said things like 'nevertheless' and 'if, in fact.'"

On how he broke out of a pitching slump: "I found a delivery in my flaw."

About his contract: "It has options through the year 2020 or until the last Rocky movie is made."

About having to bat in the World Series (he played in the AL, so normally didn't have to bat): "I thought they were in a zone, but they were playing man to man."

"I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer."

"Natural grass is a wonderful thing for little bugs and sinkerball pitchers."

"Our fielders have to catch a lot of balls, or at least deflect them to someone who can."

On home runs: "Reggie Jackson hit one off me that's still burrowing its way to Los Angeles."

On the 1981 work stoppage: "Strikes are real life. It took up seven weeks of real time. That's a fifth of a pregnancy."

On the California Angels: "They're like the American League All-Star team, and that's their problem, the American League All-Star team always loses."

On winning the 1982 Rolaids reliever of the year award: "I want to thank all the pitchers who couldn’t go nine innings, and manager Dick Howser who wouldn’t let them go."

"If we come back and win this thing, it will be like finding Amelia Earhart out on a date with Jimmy Hoffa."

"George Steinbrenner has one simple ambition. He wants all the land next to his."

About a comebacker hit by Wade Boggs that he kicked around before fielding it: "It played pinball wizard with my legs. It lit up all my bones and won a free game."

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-18-2012, 05:39 AM
Damn those are great!

:D

bot3
07-18-2012, 06:11 AM
One of my favorites is Buffslo Sabres hockey announcer Rick Generett, when, a player scored a goal..."top shelf where mother keeps the cookies".

Wargamer
07-18-2012, 09:02 AM
I can't remember who the speaker was referring to when he said of a pitcher - 'He's got a million dollar arm and a ten cent head.'

Back in the late 80's the Atlanta Braves were a truly awful team - losing 100 games a year for several straight years. At the end of one of those seasons, the first baseman, Gerald Perry, was asked about the season that just ended. He replied - "It would've been a good summer to paint the seats."

Jas09
07-18-2012, 09:40 AM
Mike Shannon has a few he likes to bring out from time to time. Two I remember off the top of my head:

"A hit up the middle right now would be like a nice ham sandwich and a cold, frosty one."

"Ol 'Abner has done it again!" for whenever a close game ends up with the best hitter at the plate in the ninth with runners on base.

Barkis is Willin'
07-18-2012, 09:52 AM
I heard a Johnny Cueto hanging curve ball referred to as an "old fashioned, letter high cement mixer" last night on FS Ohio's broadcast. I'm pretty sure that was Jeff Brantley.

RealityChuck
07-18-2012, 10:05 AM
No one's mentioned Casey Stengel yet?

My favorite: "You take Kranepool. He's 20 years old and a five-year veteran. In another five years, he'll be a ten-year veteran. Then you take Goossen. He's also 20 years old and there a good chance that in ten years he'll be 30."*

Or his testimony in front of congress (http://baseball-almanac.com/quotes/casey_stengel_senate_testimony.shtml) (abridged):
""I tell you what, I think baseball has spread, but if we are talking about anything spreading, we would be talking about soccer. You can go over in Italy, and I thought they would know DiMaggio every place. And my goodness, you mention soccer, you can draw fifty or a hundred thousand people. Over here you have a hard time to get soccer on the field, which is a great sport, no doubt."
After he finished, Mickey Mantle was asked his opinion. He said, "My views are about the same as Casey's."

Stengel also said:
"The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided."
"Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in."


*Don't add up the numbers. This is Casey.

Skywatcher
07-18-2012, 10:08 AM
Dizzy Dean:
"I know who's the best pitcher I ever see and it's old Satchel Paige, that big lanky colored boy. My fastball looks like a change of pace alongside that little pistol bullet ole Satchel shoots up to the plate."

"If Satch and I were pitching on the same team, we would clinch the pennant by July Fourth and go fishing until World Series time."

As for how "Dizzy" was bestowed upon Mr. Jay Hanna Dean, Ben Jones relates it here (1:57) with some help (http://youtube.com/watch?v=3tVPTqwIwiQ).

Clothahump
07-18-2012, 10:21 AM
"He's baseball's exorcist, scares the devil out of you." - Dick Sharon, speaking of Nolan Ryan.


"X-RAY OF DEAN'S HEAD REVEALS NOTHING" - Newspaper Headline about Dizzy Dean


"The best umpired game is the game in which the fans cannot recall the umpires who worked it." - Bill Klem, one of the best umpires ever (speaking as an umpire myself, he is absolutely correct).


"Booze, broads, and bullshit. If you got all that, what else do you need?" - Famed annoucer Harry Caray.


"Just one (superstition). Whenever I hit a home run, I make certain I touch all four bases." - Babe Ruth

mkecane
07-18-2012, 10:30 AM
I always liked the saying about the old Washington Senators:

First in War.
First in Peace.
Last in the American League.

FoieGrasIsEvil
07-18-2012, 10:33 AM
I heard a Johnny Cueto hanging curve ball referred to as an "old fashioned, letter high cement mixer" last night on FS Ohio's broadcast. I'm pretty sure that was Jeff Brantley.

Jeff Brantley is a pretty funny guy.

astorian
07-18-2012, 10:35 AM
When catcher Tim McCarver would approach the mound to give advice to pitcher Bob Gibson, Gibson would always yell at him, "Go back behind the plate. The only thing YOU know about pitching is that you can't hit it."

divemaster
07-18-2012, 10:44 AM
Watching a Cubs game on TV about 20-25 years ago. A batter hits a blooper behind first base. The first baseman races back and lays out trying to catch the ball. He goes facefirst into the chalk line as the ball lands fair.

Steve Stone: "The batter reaches safely on a lime dive base hit."

Sternvogel
07-18-2012, 11:07 PM
Jeff Lichtman's post reminded me of another Quisenberry line. Referring to teammate Renie Martin, "Quiz" proclaimed: "Some pitchers throw to spots, some throw to zones. Renie throws to continents."

In contrast to Martin, Satchel Paige was notable for his accuracy. Ken Harrelson once told a story about meeting Paige when "Hawk" was with the Kansas City A's and Paige, then approximately 59 years old, was signed for a "stunt" appearance by owner Charlie Finley. Harrelson asked Paige, "Did you really put a gum wrapper on the plate when you were warming up and try to throw every pitch over that little piece of paper?" Paige replied, "Absolutely. And let me tell you, Hawk, I worked both sides of that wrapper."

Incidentally, Paige allowed one hit in the three innings he pitched (http://history.com/this-day-in-history/fifty-nine-year-old-satchel-paige-pitches-three-innings) that September day in 1965.

astorian
07-19-2012, 09:36 AM
Dan Quisenberry was one of the most quotable people ever in sports:

"A manager uses a relief pitcher like a six shooter, he fires until it's empty then takes the gun and throws it at the villain."

About Ted Simmons: "He didn't sound like a baseball player. He said things like 'nevertheless' and 'if, in fact.'"

On how he broke out of a pitching slump: "I found a delivery in my flaw."

About his contract: "It has options through the year 2020 or until the last Rocky movie is made."

About having to bat in the World Series (he played in the AL, so normally didn't have to bat): "I thought they were in a zone, but they were playing man to man."

"I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer."

"Natural grass is a wonderful thing for little bugs and sinkerball pitchers."

"Our fielders have to catch a lot of balls, or at least deflect them to someone who can."

On home runs: "Reggie Jackson hit one off me that's still burrowing its way to Los Angeles."

On the 1981 work stoppage: "Strikes are real life. It took up seven weeks of real time. That's a fifth of a pregnancy."

On the California Angels: "They're like the American League All-Star team, and that's their problem, the American League All-Star team always loses."

On winning the 1982 Rolaids reliever of the year award: "I want to thank all the pitchers who couldn’t go nine innings, and manager Dick Howser who wouldn’t let them go."

"If we come back and win this thing, it will be like finding Amelia Earhart out on a date with Jimmy Hoffa."

"George Steinbrenner has one simple ambition. He wants all the land next to his."

About a comebacker hit by Wade Boggs that he kicked around before fielding it: "It played pinball wizard with my legs. It lit up all my bones and won a free game."


I loved Quisenberry, even though he was murder on my Yankees.


But the Quisenberry quote I'll always remember was a sad and profound one, not a funny one.

When he was dying from a brain tumor, he said,

People always want to know if I ever ask, "Why me?" And I never do, because... why NOT me?

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