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#1
Old 02-06-2003, 12:25 PM
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Ask the guy who used to frequent hookers!

I availed myself of the services of prostitutes from the age of 22 until I was 31 (ending about 3 years ago). Since this is something almost nobody ever admits to, I imagine some people might be curious about the world of sex for hire.

So go ahead and ask. I only hired women (as far as I know), so I can't answer anything about gay prostitution. I was not into S&M or B&D. I'm talking about picking up hookers on the street, although I did use an agency a couple of times. I will be completely honest, but will avoid answering any questions that may give away my identity.
#2
Old 02-06-2003, 12:47 PM
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What was the average cost for straight sex?
#3
Old 02-06-2003, 12:53 PM
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Was protection always required? Even if it wasn't, did you use it?

Did you find most prostitutes to be less attractive once you were alone with them?
#4
Old 02-06-2003, 12:53 PM
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Hey Coldfire, we know it's you !!
#5
Old 02-06-2003, 12:56 PM
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Did you ever have to deal through a pimp? If so, did he have gold teeth and a oversized hat?
#6
Old 02-06-2003, 12:59 PM
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How often did you go to one?

Did you use a special hooker most of the time or did any old one do?

Why did you use a hooker instead of just dating?

Were any of them good looking or did you care about that at all?
#7
Old 02-06-2003, 01:00 PM
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Was it sad and depressing? Did you feel guilty about engaging in slavery? Did you ever get arrested? Are you unable to get women to sleep with you without paying them? Did you get a disease (that you know of)? If you have ever been intimate with a non-prostitute, did you tell her about your high-risk past?
#8
Old 02-06-2003, 01:02 PM
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All these intense, deep questions and all I think about is the cost. Maybe I should be a pimp (a Madame, for women, right?).
#9
Old 02-06-2003, 01:03 PM
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Why not try to pick up a women at a bar? Maybe I'm just moral stricken but to me hookers = bleh. I still remember going w/ a friend down 'ho stro' (as my friend called it) at about 2am... some of the most scary looking 'women' (i use that term VERY loosley here) standing around in their underwear.
#10
Old 02-06-2003, 01:09 PM
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Quote:
What was the average cost for straight sex?
$50 for half and half (oral sex followed by intercourse). The range was from $20 to $150, but most women charged $50.

Quote:
Was protection always required? Even if it wasn't, did you use it?
Protection was generally required for intercourse. Only about 10% of the women insisted on using condoms for oral sex. I did not use condoms for oral sex unless the woman insisted. There were two women I had intercourse with without a condom (one of them several times). Amazingly, I never caught any STDs. I have been tested for everything they can test for and all results have been negative.

Quote:
Did you find most prostitutes to be less attractive once you were alone with them?
Physically? No. Or do you mean was the thrill more in the hunt than in the sex? I enjoyed the sex, but generally was disgusted with myself afterwards because I longed for a real relationship but took the easy way out by paying for sex instead.

Quote:
Did you ever have to deal through a pimp? If so, did he have gold teeth and a oversized hat?
I guess the agencies are pimps, but I never had to deal with street pimps. Most women seemed to be independent contractors.
#11
Old 02-06-2003, 01:09 PM
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madmonk






Anyway ...

Since Pretty Woman, I've wondered about the level of "professionalism" in that line of work. Did it seem to you that the majority of prostitutes were high school dropous and have drug problems? Was it likely that some of them were just doing it to get some quick cash to move on with their lives? What sort of attitudes did they display?

Did they seem to act as though they were only thinking about the money and not about what they were doing?
#12
Old 02-06-2003, 01:15 PM
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Quote:
How often did you go to one?
I'd guess about once every two weeks on average.

Quote:
Did you use a special hooker most of the time or did any old one do?
I had a few favorites I would pick up if they were out, but I would try out a new one if the pickings were slim.

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Why did you use a hooker instead of just dating?
I was too shy to ask women out. I wanted sex and I paid for it.

Quote:
Were any of them good looking or did you care about that at all?
There were many good looking women working the streets. I didn't discriminate based on looks, but rather on a gut feel of how good she would be at performing sexual favors. My gut was not very accurate.
#13
Old 02-06-2003, 01:27 PM
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Quote:
Was it sad and depressing?
Yes. I was diagnosed as severely depressed at the age of 27.

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Did you feel guilty about engaging in slavery?
I did not consider it slavery. A few of the women did it because they enjoyed sex and made lots of money doing it. Many did it for drug money. I was paying for a service, not making them work for free.

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Did you ever get arrested?
No. There were several times that I was caught with a prostitute in my car by the police, but never in the middle of sex. The cops were very forthright that they couldn't arrest me because they couldn't prove whether the illegal acts had occurred yet.

The closest call was when I approached a woman in my car and asked her to get in so we could talk. She didn't want to get in until I told her what I wanted. This raised a red flag and I drove away. Lo and behold, there was a police van waiting just around the corner. The woman was a cop.

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Are you unable to get women to sleep with you without paying them?
At the time, yes. I was shy and awkward and lacking in social graces. I couldn't get laid on my own merits.

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Did you get a disease (that you know of)?
I answered this above.

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If you have ever been intimate with a non-prostitute, did you tell her about your high-risk past?
I have been with three non-prostitutes. I told all of them that I had engaged in non-safe sex many times with women I did not know and would never see again. I was tested and was clean. They all were willing to sleep with me and none has reported any STDs to me.
#14
Old 02-06-2003, 01:31 PM
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So why did you quit going?

Did you meet someone? Go to a Tony Robbins seminar? Grow out of it?
#15
Old 02-06-2003, 01:37 PM
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Quote:
Since Pretty Woman, I've wondered about the level of "professionalism" in that line of work. Did it seem to you that the majority of prostitutes were high school dropous and have drug problems? Was it likely that some of them were just doing it to get some quick cash to move on with their lives? What sort of attitudes did they display?

Did they seem to act as though they were only thinking about the money and not about what they were doing?
They ranged from crack addicts to college students to women making a living selling sex. Some were very professional and made sure they provided good service for their fee. Others would do as little as possible and rush me. Some took the money and ran. There was no correlation between their station in life and the level of service they provided. One of the drug addicts gave a blowjob most men would kill for. Some of the more well-dressed sexy women were completely dull and interested only in the money.
#16
Old 02-06-2003, 01:49 PM
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So why did you quit going?

Did you meet someone? Go to a Tony Robbins seminar? Grow out of it?
I met someone. I quit months before I asked her out because I wanted to make sure I could stay away for good. I knew that I would marry her even before we started dating, and I didn't want to screw it up.

I do sometimes think of visiting a prostitute, but I realize everything that I would lose and I stop myself. It is purely a sexual urge now, which I have learned to control. When I was using prostitutes part of it was a need for close human contact, which I had none of in my life at the time. Now that I'm married, my need for closeness is satisfied. My need for sex is not always satisfied, but I'm an adult and can handle that without endangering myself or my family.
#17
Old 02-06-2003, 02:02 PM
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Great thread title/thread starter combination.
#18
Old 02-06-2003, 02:08 PM
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How did you know where to go at first?

Where did you end up having sex?
#19
Old 02-06-2003, 02:30 PM
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What time of day (or night) did you go out looking? Was it a planned thing, or spur-of-the-moment? I'm also curious how you knew where to go to find them.

Other than cash-and-dash -- a hooker taking the money and running -- were you ever robbed or threatened?

Were these mostly car dates (he said euphemistically) or did you have a place to take the ladies?

- Rick
#20
Old 02-06-2003, 02:30 PM
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Did you ever end up with a man by accident (that you know of)?
#21
Old 02-06-2003, 02:41 PM
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So you drove up or called an escort service? How could you tell if a service "provided"? (or, as I suspect, did they all?) How could you tell if a street walker was a prostitute, and not just someone going to the store?
#22
Old 02-06-2003, 02:47 PM
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Quote:
How did you know where to go at first?
I read newspaper articles about the prostitution problem in my city. They told me exactly where to go. Even had a map pointing out the best spots.

Quote:
Where did you end up having sex?
Most times we had sex in the car. Sometimes I would get a room in a cheap hotel (usually $50). Sometimes the woman would take me to her place, but I only did that with women I had been with before so I had some sense of whether I could trust them.

Quote:
Did you ever end up with a man by accident (that you know of)?
Not that I know of. There were transvestites and transsexuals in the area I cruised, so it is possible I was fooled once or twice. Most of them were easy to spot.

Quote:
What time of day (or night) did you go out looking? Was it a planned thing, or spur-of-the-moment?
I would go any time of day or night. I didn't have any friends or obligations (besides work), so I could just go whenever the urge hit.

Quote:
Other than cash-and-dash -- a hooker taking the money and running -- were you ever robbed or threatened?
I was never robbed in the sense of the woman saying "Give me your wallet." I was threatened twice. One time there was a misunderstanding over how much I was to pay. I had said "fifteen" (a lowball figure to start negotiations), she heard "fifty". She threatened to stab me if I didn't pay $50. I went to the ATM and paid her.

The other threat was when I tried to back out because the woman was obviously going to run if I gave her the money. She threatened to get her boyfriend or some other guy to beat me up. I paid her instead. She then offered to provide the sex we had agreed to but I declined.
#23
Old 02-06-2003, 03:00 PM
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Quote:
So you drove up or called an escort service?
I used an escort service twice. Every other time I picked up a woman on the street.

Quote:
How could you tell if a service "provided"? (or, as I suspect, did they all?)
As far as I know, all escort services "provide." The two times I used them I was disappointed because the women did not match the descriptions I was given and they are much more expensive. I also didn't like having to give them my phone number.

Quote:
How could you tell if a street walker was a prostitute, and not just someone going to the store?
Street walkers make eye contact with drivers. Women walking to the store in areas where street walkers work do not make eye contact with drivers.
#24
Old 02-06-2003, 03:00 PM
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Oooh, interesting topic.

I've always heard that hookers won't let you kiss them because it's too personal. What's your experience with kissing hookers? Did they let you? If so, did you even want to kiss them?
#25
Old 02-06-2003, 03:01 PM
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Did you have sex with girls who appeared to be underage (despite make-up and such)?
#26
Old 02-06-2003, 03:27 PM
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Quote:
I've always heard that hookers won't let you kiss them because it's too personal. What's your experience with kissing hookers? Did they let you? If so, did you even want to kiss them?
There were a few who would offer to kiss. There were a couple who really wanted to kiss. I never kissed any of them. It wasn't because I thought they would contaminate me somehow (if you've read my earlier answers, that was hardly a concern of mine), but I just wasn't interested.

Quote:
Did you have sex with girls who appeared to be underage (despite make-up and such)?
The cops didn't let the underage girls work the streets. I would see a young girl from time to time, but I learned from the older women that when the cops see the young girls they take them off the streets. I didn't seek out underage girls but odds are that I did pick some up, though I never picked up anyone who looked underage or who I suspected might be underage.
#27
Old 02-06-2003, 03:27 PM
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Do you feel that prostitution should be legal or illegal? Why?
#28
Old 02-06-2003, 03:35 PM
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I've been asked 3 times... well.. it was assumed 3 times that I was a hooker....downtown during the noon hour, by business men in suits. Not at all what I had thought; dark streets, insightful men.


I've heard or seen from movies....that hookers usually say that the men wanted more than just an orgasm. Sometimes just paying them for their time.. but using it to talk or cuddle and not even hump.

How about you? Was it just strictly sex.. or was it companionship too?
#29
Old 02-06-2003, 03:45 PM
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Do you feel that prostitution should be legal or illegal? Why?
I believe prostitution should be legal. I don't believe that sex for money is immoral. It is just another service, like a massage or a haircut. There surely are women who are victimized by being forced into prostitution, but there are others who do it because it is very profitable and they enjoy sex. Forcing someone into prostitution should be illegal, not prostitution itself.

Some of the women I was with clearly enjoyed the sex (Andrea Dworkin will not agree, but she probably is not reading this thread). Some faked it well. Some of them took pride in the fact that they provided a service which made men happy. Others were obviously only doing it for the money. If I felt that the woman was being forced (if she mentioned having to get home to bring the money to her boyfriend or something) I would give her the money but not have sex with her. I knew some of these women are victimized, and I didn't want to be involved with them.
#30
Old 02-06-2003, 03:48 PM
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What city do you live in (or if that's too personal, do you live in one of the "big five" or a smallish town)?
#31
Old 02-06-2003, 03:53 PM
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Kind of a naive question, but how, exactly, does it work? Would you just pull over, get the woman's attention, discuss price, and do it? Was there any sort of warm-up, or did you just jump right into the heavy stuff? Did you get to really know any of the women who's services you used regularly? Or was it just...get in the car, screw, and end it?
#32
Old 02-06-2003, 03:54 PM
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Would it bother you if your mother, sister, daughter or wife was a prostitute? How about your son?
#33
Old 02-06-2003, 04:06 PM
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Quote:
How about you? Was it just strictly sex.. or was it companionship too?
There were a few women with whom I struck up a rapport. If they weren't in a rush, we would sometimes spend time talking before and/or after the sex. As I said before, I was seeking closeness in addition to sex. I was very lonely. I never considered any of them friends, but I did enjoy talking to them. I can't recall ever cuddling; it would be too personal. Strange lines are drawn.

Several women wondered why a guy like me was paying for sex. I am good looking, reasonably fit, witty, polite, and I make a good amount of money. Most people probably assumed I had no problem meeting women. I was very shy and terrible at small talk, so I didn't get very far on dates. I didn't have to worry about that with prostitutes. It was actually good practice. I was able to learn to talk to women without the pressure of worrying about what they thought about me. And I was guaranteed sex.
#34
Old 02-06-2003, 04:18 PM
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What city do you live in?
I lived in Boston at the time.

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Would it bother you if your mother, sister, daughter or wife was a prostitute? How about your son?
If my daughter becomes a prostitute, it will bother me. It will also bother me if she becomes a Republican. In either case I will blame myself for raising her wrong. I don't care if my children are gay or straight, but it would bother me if my son (I don't have one yet) were to become a prostitute. Or a mortgage broker.

I don't look down on prostitutes, so if my mother, sister, or wife told me they were ever prostitutes I would not be bothered. As long as it was a choice they made and not something they did because a man forced them I would respect it.
Quote:
Kind of a naive question, but how, exactly, does it work? Would you just pull over, get the woman's attention, discuss price, and do it?
That's exactly how it works. I was always careful to make sure she offered sex before I offered money. The undercover cops do not say anything which will let you use the entrapment defense. If the woman didn't make it clear she was offering sex for money I drove away.
Quote:
Was there any sort of warm-up, or did you just jump right into the heavy stuff? Did you get to really know any of the women who's services you used regularly? Or was it just...get in the car, screw, and end it?
Mostly the latter. I answered this in more detail earlier.
#35
Old 02-06-2003, 04:25 PM
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I've heard it said that men go to prostitutes not for sex, but for them to leave afterwards. Clearly, this was not the case with you, you were looking for sex and closeness by your own account.

Although I never went to prostitutes myself, that was mainly from fear of getting arrested or robbed. If not for that fear, I also might have frequented prostitutes in my younger days. And it also would have been for the sex, not for them to go away afterwards.

Did the women ever confirm or deny this "going afterwards" chestnut? Sounds like BS to me.
#36
Old 02-06-2003, 04:36 PM
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Originally posted by isthatsowrong?
half and half (oral sex followed by intercourse)
Is that two orgasms, or fellatio solely to achieve erection for coitus?
#37
Old 02-06-2003, 04:44 PM
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What other terms are used to describe various sex acts? Would the prosistutes let you come on their face? How long would an encounter typically last? Ever visit a massage parlor? If so, are they basically just "dine in" escort services? Ever have two at once?
#38
Old 02-06-2003, 04:54 PM
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What's the foreplay situation like?
#39
Old 02-06-2003, 06:12 PM
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Quote:
I've heard it said that men go to prostitutes not for sex, but for them to leave afterwards.
Did the women ever confirm or deny this "going afterwards" chestnut? Sounds like BS to me.
None ever told me that one. They mostly said that men came to them because their wives/girlfriends/etc. didn't satisfy them.

It's not so much that the women in our lives don't leave after sex, it's that they immediately start asking "Do I look fat?"
Quote:
half and half (oral sex followed by intercourse)

Is that two orgasms, or fellatio solely to achieve erection for coitus
The latter. Two "pops" (the term generally used) usually costs extra, though there were some women who would charge by the hour rather than by the act.

Quote:
What's the foreplay situation like?
There is little seducing and carressing, though you can get that if you want. I just jumped right to the sex. You don't want to spend too much time getting to know your "date" in a car parked behind a warehouse.

Quote:
What other terms are used to describe various sex acts? Would the prosistutes let you come on their face? How long would an encounter typically last? Ever visit a massage parlor? If so, are they basically just "dine in" escort services? Ever have two at once?
Other than "half and half", most terms are the same ones most people know: Greek for anal sex, head for a blowjob, etc.

Some would let you come on their faces, some would not. Some charged extra, some did not. I did it a few times and concluded that it adds nothing to the experience. There was one woman who requested it, so I would do it for her.

A "date" would last anywhere from a few minutes for a quick blowjob to several hours in a hotel room. More time costs more money.

Never went to a massage parlor. Seemed too risky, believe it or not.

Yes, I had two at once. That was fun.
#40
Old 02-06-2003, 08:49 PM
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Without making any moral judgements about prostitution, I just wanted to commend you for having the cajones to share this information with us. It's been quite fascinating.

Thanks much, and glad you found someone special in your life.
#41
Old 02-06-2003, 09:17 PM
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How much did greek cost?
#42
Old 02-06-2003, 09:34 PM
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Quote:
Without making any moral judgements about prostitution, I just wanted to commend you for having the cajones to share this information with us. It's been quite fascinating.
It was not too difficult since my anonymity is probably pretty safe.

I did this for myself, really. I like to talk about my experiences, but this one is definitely not something I can discuss with anyone in my social circle. I did tell one female friend that I was with hookers. She didn't think it was so bad, especially since she understood the severe depression I was in at the time. She was just concerned for my safety.
#43
Old 02-06-2003, 09:39 PM
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How much did greek cost?
I did that twice. The first time was $150. I think the second time was $100. Most women did not offer it at all.
#44
Old 02-06-2003, 09:48 PM
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Did you make sure the statute of limitations had tolled before you started confessing to crimes on a public message board?
#45
Old 02-06-2003, 11:43 PM
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This thread is fascinating.

What sorts of women were you attracted to? Did they dress provocatively? Did you find that arousing? Now, that you are married, do you enjoy seeing your wife dressed in revealing clothing? Would you prefer her to dress more conservatively because of your experiences?

Are you now, or were you into pornography? Films, peepshows, magazines?

Can you describe a few of the women? (Age, physical attributes, lifestyle, etc)

This is fascinating.
#46
Old 02-07-2003, 05:38 AM
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Did you make sure the statute of limitations had tolled before you started confessing to crimes on a public message board?
No. I'm sure the statute of limitations has passed by now, but I'm not concerned about it anyway. I was found with prostitutes in my car by the police and was never arrested. The only way to get busted for soliciting sex is to solicit an undercover cop or to have witnesses to the transaction. Someone must see money change hands and sex follow. They don't have enough evidence otherwise. The police told me this. While the police are not legal experts, I believe they would know the rules on this. I'm sure they would have loved to arrest me if they could have.
#47
Old 02-07-2003, 06:32 AM
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What sorts of women were you attracted to? Did they dress provocatively? Did you find that arousing?
Most of the women did not put on a hooker uniform (fishnet stockings, short skirt, revealing top, high heels). In most cases, the only thing that differentitated the hookers from the other women in the area was the fact that the hookers were looking into the passing cars and the other women weren't. The fancily dressed hookers would come out late at night, but I had no interest in them. They were more expensive and drew more attention to themselves, and thus to me by picking them up.

I do not find revealing clothing particularly arousing. Most women I picked up were wearing jeans, sneakers, and the appropriate clothing for the season.

Quote:
Now, that you are married, do you enjoy seeing your wife dressed in revealing clothing? Would you prefer her to dress more conservatively because of your experiences?
My wife dresses very nicely, but not revealingly (if that is an actual adverb). She does sometimes slip into something a bit sexier in private. She does this as much for herself as for me.

Quote:
Are you now, or were you into pornography? Films, peepshows, magazines?
I watch pornography once or twice a week. My wife doesn't want the same amount of sex as I do, so I masturbate often. I enjoy watching porn and it gets me aroused more quickly. I had access to a lot of magazines in my teen years, but now that I can enjoy porn in the privacy of my home, I don't find the magazines stimulating enough. I have not progressed to harder and harder porn; I watch "normal" porn -- non-violent, non-fetish, just two (or more) people having what looks like consensual sex.

Quote:
Can you describe a few of the women? (Age, physical attributes, lifestyle, etc)
I'll describe a few of the ones I saw more than once. I learned very little about most of the others.

Anna - 20 years old, short, medium build, red hair. Most men would find her plain, except for the red hair. Had her baby daughter's name tattooed on her arm. She supported her lifestyle, which seemed to consist of watching TV and smoking pot, by selling sex. She said she had started in the business at 13.

Pam - Mid-20s. Short, thin, black hair. Attractive, but wore lots of makeup to cover a bad complexion. Had several children, though some were taken away by Social Services. She didn't seem very smart, but she made a fortune on the streets. She would earn $3000 on the average weekend. I don't know what she did with the money. I doubt she was putting it in T-bills. She didn't have any of the signs of drug addiction, but that money was going somewhere.

Mikki (or some cutesy spelling) - Mid-20s, tall, thin, brown hair. Absolutely beautiful. Lived in a tiny room in a boarding house. She seemed so out of place. Why she was a street walker I'll never know.

Paula - Late 30s. Short, heavy build (not really fat, but "sturdy"). Had a teenaged son. Did it because she could make far more money than any other job she had the skills for.

Chic - Early 40s? Hard to tell. Very thin. Some sort of drug addict, I'm sure, but was very professional. She gave incredible head for only $20.

Shelley - Mid-20s. Average height, medium build. I saw her over several years and watched her deteriorate from a pretty young woman to a skinny, addicted, desperate woman. Not surprisingly, the sex followed suit. Most of the addicts had nothing on their minds except getting their next fix.

I tend to be attracted to women who most men seem to consider "plain." I like all kinds of builds, except for obese. Like most men, I don't like a woman to be taller than me.

Obviously, since these are women I went back to several times, they were mostly good experiences. There were many others who would start asking "Are you almost done?" as soon as we started. There were ones who wanted to buy their drugs before we had sex. There were ones who I picked up but didn't have sex with because they turned out to be crazy, filthy, or stoned. There was one time that I suspected she was a he, so she/he got the boot (another woman later confirmed that it was indeed a man). If they got in the car, I generally had to pay them whether we had sex or not. Some took the money and then said, "I have to give the money to my boyfriend before we start." Not surprisingly, they never came back to finish the deal.
#48
Old 02-07-2003, 06:48 AM
And Full Contact Origami
SDSAB
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 55,795
Did you have a particular routine to assure yourself you weren't picking up an undercover decoy? Did the girls make an effort to assure themselves you weren't an undercover cop?
#49
Old 02-07-2003, 11:52 AM
BANNED
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 184
Quote:
Did you have a particular routine to assure yourself you weren't picking up an undercover decoy? Did the girls make an effort to assure themselves you weren't an undercover cop?
I would only ask "Are you working?" or "Can we go out?" The woman would generally ask "How much?" I was never the first one to mention money. The undercover cops never mentioned money or sex. They wanted you to hang yourself. I knew their game and they never caught me. I saw plenty of guys get caught in what the cops called Operation Squeeze.

Some women believed that asking "Are you a cop?" would protect them against arrest. This isn't true, however; a cop can lie. Some women insisted that I touch them or show them my penis. They told me that the cops never do those things. I don't know if there is a legal reason why the cops wouldn't touch them, but it seemed to be their best protection against soliciting a cop.
#50
Old 02-07-2003, 11:56 AM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,996
Were you nervous the first time you picked up a hooker? What time of day was it?

Was the first time you had intercourse with a hooker? If so, how do you feel about it?
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