#1
Old 03-22-2003, 03:16 PM
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 668
Funny Exclamations

What funny exclamations have you heard someone say either in response to something or as a prelude to a comment? For instance, one of the most humorous ones I've heard was "Jesus tap-dancing Christ, are you insane".
#2
Old 03-22-2003, 03:46 PM
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Dumpsville. Pop. :You
Posts: 3,647
Sweet Zombie Jesus! (from Futurama)

Great googly moogly (from Snickers, I think)
#3
Old 03-22-2003, 04:56 PM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Here
Posts: 1,677
"Jumpin' Jesus on a pogostick!"
#4
Old 03-23-2003, 12:08 AM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,422
During a stand-up routine, Bobcat Goldthwait approached some hecklers in the front row. He overshot the end of the stage. Between the edge of the stage and the first row, there's a decorative curtain hung from a lip. Between the lip and the stage is a gap about large enough to fit a human leg.

Goldthwait's leg fell through that gap, and he cut it pretty greusomely. There was a decent amount of blood.

When this happened, he just shouted, "Dogcock!"

This took even him by surprise, and before he even mentioned anything about his fall, he just went on for a few minutes about where the hell he came up with "Dogcock"

To his credit, he didn't let it slow him down. Every now and then, he'd roll up his pant leg to check on the wound (which was bleeding for quite some time), and he worked it into his act pretty smoothly, but he never once let it slow him down. Only at the end, when people were shouting for an encore, did he finally admit, "you know, I'd love to stay out here a bit longer, but this is really starting to sting."

This was at Binghamton University, two Octobers ago. I doubt it's on tape, but everyone at that show will remember the word "Dogcock"
#5
Old 03-23-2003, 12:13 AM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Amid 50,001 Bongo Beaters
Posts: 739
When Harry Truman learned that President Roosevelt had died, he said "Jesus Christ and General Jackson!"
__________________


If you fall asleep on the couch in a house where a woman is present, there will be a blanket or a coat covering you when you awaken.

-George Carlin
#6
Old 03-23-2003, 12:54 AM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Mostly Texas
Posts: 1,540
"Sweet merciful crap!" - Homer Simpson, upon seeing his car covered in seashells
#7
Old 03-23-2003, 01:00 AM
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Chicago 'Burbs
Posts: 5,457
From one of my favorite books: "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!"

From my daughter, mixing expressions unwittingly: "For crying out Pete!"

<slight hijack>I saw Bobcat several years ago on Comic Relief - he did a whole routine about a juicer, then threw a squid in the mix. He drank it, went on for about a minute, then ran off the stage gagging. he came back later and said, "Man, I thought that would be funny but it just tasted like SHIT!" I can't stand that weird voice he does, but he is AWFULLY funny sometimes.</hijack>
#8
Old 03-23-2003, 12:35 PM
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 256
"Sweet Sassy Molassy"
- Ray Romano
#9
Old 03-23-2003, 01:03 PM
Eve Eve is offline
Guest
Join Date: Dec 1999
Posts: 22,064
I've been trying to cuss less, and use exclamations like "Nerts!" and "Jiminey Crickets!"

I've been having only moderate success.
#10
Old 03-23-2003, 01:12 PM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 68
Quote:
Originally posted by Max Carnage
Great googly moogly (from Snickers, I think)
That line was used on a Frank Zappa album, "Apostrophe."

I personally like some of the exclamations used by a Mormon friend. My favorite is:

"Oh my Heck!"
#11
Old 03-23-2003, 01:19 PM
Guest
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Indiana
Posts: 5,855
One of my favorites is, "Holy Batshit, Robin"
#12
Old 03-23-2003, 02:41 PM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Santa Barbara, CA
Posts: 937
"Zark off!" in THHGTTG, Zaphod fires this one off quite a few times.

One that's not really all that funny, but something about the delivery made it: In Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Depp shouts "Jesus God!" and throws a handfull of change at a valet (I think, it may have been a rental agency employee) as he speeds off.
__________________
Intelligence is knowing the rules of the game.
Wisdom is how you play the game.
Whack-a-Mole
#13
Old 03-23-2003, 02:45 PM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 1999
Location: 23 male, Boston
Posts: 5,791
These may have older sources, but I heard "Mamma pajama" from Mystery Men and "Holy guacamole" from a Mario comic. You have to say them so that they rhyme.
#14
Old 03-23-2003, 04:31 PM
Registered User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Garden Spot of the South
Posts: 9,135
My sainted father is a world-class cusser. He says stuff like "Jesus H. God on a Bloody Crutch" and "Blast-E-Damn !!". He squeezes each syllable through his teeth, whilst looking like he could explode.

He'd come thru the house in the middle of the night and trip over something: "Ja - HEEE - zus ......... JOE - seff ... and MARY ".

He & mom sang in the church choir; the loft was raised and choir members very visible. One day lightning hit the church steeple * C R A K K KK K A A A W *

In the split second of silence my Dad's huge basso profundo rang out over the cowering congregations' heads : "MUTHA ....... uv ......... GAWD"


#15
Old 03-27-2003, 09:15 AM
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Unified States of America
Posts: 250
"Criminalities!"

My mother's pretty tame. That is her only swear word.
#16
Old 03-27-2003, 09:19 AM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Washington
Posts: 252
One time when my friend and his little brother were walking past a kettle corn cart, he exclaimed: "Hot Boy!"
A mix between Hot Damn and Oh Boy, it was quite funny.
__________________
If you're robbing a bank and you're pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the hostages laugh too, because, come on, life is funny.
#17
Old 03-27-2003, 09:39 AM
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Over by dere
Posts: 27,023
One of my favorites (and I'll be damned if I can remember where I heard it) is, "Well, lick my leg!"
#18
Old 03-27-2003, 09:43 AM
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Oak Park, IL
Posts: 2,766
Marge Simpson: "Doodlebugs!"

One I picked up somewhere: "Christ on a cracker!"
#19
Old 03-27-2003, 09:58 AM
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: The suburbs of Innsmouth
Posts: 4,434
Whilst engaged in a debate with a Jewish friend of mine, he ended a particularly strong sentence with the exclamation "Shalom, b*tch!" I laughed for half an hour. (This is the same guy who refers to himself as a "Hebro.")
__________________
unhappy are they that hear some old god speak while he sleeps being still deep in slumber
#20
Old 03-27-2003, 10:11 AM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 65
Every Christmas, my darling mother cuts loose with a string of invective brought on the stress of so much cookie baking.
Usually there is a tremendous bang, or the smell of smoke, followed by a terror-inducing "Jesus H Christ god damn sonuvabitch." It's all very long, loud, and drawn out until she hits the "sonuvabitch," which is said as one word while exhaling.

At that point, my dad and I make ourselves scarce.
#21
Old 03-27-2003, 10:47 AM
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Loudoun County, Virginia
Posts: 845
One of the funniest exclamations comes from Dumb & Dumber: when Jim Carrey explaims "Suck me sideways" after seeing Lauren Holly's house.
__________________
"You don't sound like you're very happy! I'll teach you to be happy! I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs! It's the little critters of nature! They don't know that they're ugly! That's very funny! A fly marrying a bumblebee! I told ya I'd shoot, but ya didn't believe me! WHY DIDN'T YOU BELIEVE ME!!!"
#22
Old 03-27-2003, 11:04 AM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Calgary Alberta (Canada)
Posts: 992
When I was 14, a booking error during the annual family vacation in Florida resulted in my getting my own hotel room, where I discovered the wonders of HBO. For a Canadian teen-aged boy used to the CBC and all 4 other channels, this was quite an education...

The one show I remember to this day was a segment on a comedy rant on 100 uses of the F-word. For some reason, the particular expression

"Holy Mongolian clusterfuck!"

reduced this teenager to helpess laughter for 10 minutes, and it stuck with me to this day.
#23
Old 03-27-2003, 02:57 PM
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Fifth corner of the Earth
Posts: 17,034
Steve Purcell's comic book series, Sam and Max: Freelance Police, has a lot of these.

"Holy jumping mother o'God in a side-car with chocolate jimmies and a lobster bib!"

"Holy cripes on toast!"

"Holy jumping weasel critters on a hot cross bun!"
__________________
--R.J.
Electric Escape -- Information superhighway rest area #10,186
#24
Old 03-27-2003, 03:02 PM
Charter Member
Join Date: May 1999
Location: da UP, eh
Posts: 13,193
Jesus takes a shit!
#25
Old 03-27-2003, 03:19 PM
Charter Member
Join Date: Jul 1999
Location: SEC
Posts: 13,875
"Mother Marion Barry!"

--Thurgood Stubbs, voiced by Eddie Murphy in the classic TV series "The PJs"
#26
Old 03-27-2003, 03:20 PM
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2000
Posts: 304
When I was a young' un, my brother Aaron, older than me by 8 years was doing something to help me out, tying my shoes or something, and I was getting fidgety so he finally yelled out "HOLD YOUR LEFT... TOE!!!". He would normally have ended that expression with "NUT", I'm sure, but being that I was young and innocent he thought of the next body part he could come up with, the toe. There was dead silence when he said it, then we both laughed our asses off. I may have been 6 years old or something, but I surely knew where he was going with that! I still remember it, 30 years later.
#27
Old 03-27-2003, 05:06 PM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Denver
Posts: 7,562
well I'll be picked off a vine and eaten grape-by-grape by a girl in her teens . . .
#28
Old 03-27-2003, 07:01 PM
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: SC
Posts: 1,609
Quote:
Originally posted by LifeOnWry
From one of my favorite books: "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!"

That's mine too. Probably from the same book, I suspect (Outlander).
#29
Old 03-27-2003, 07:29 PM
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 81
A guy I worked with in the 70's building power plants said "f***" for every other word. But my favorite he only used when surprised: "Well F*** me naked" My husband and I still say that on occasion and I have never heard it from anyone else.
#30
Old 03-28-2003, 12:03 AM
Charter Member
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Atlanta area
Posts: 5,947
In "Johnny Dangerously," a film a lot of people hated, but which I thought was pretty funny, the bad guy Roman Moroni had several great ones: "You fargin' bastidges," "fargin' iceholes," "you lousy corksuckers," delivered (by actor Richard Dimitri) in an indeterminate European accent.
#31
Old 03-28-2003, 12:11 AM
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Bama
Posts: 10,747
"Fuck me sideways!"
"Fuck me runnin'!"
"Jesus Haploid Christ!"
"Laird Thunderin' Jaysus!"
#32
Old 03-28-2003, 12:13 AM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Evergreen Terrace
Posts: 2,479
"Well, tie me down and spank my bottom with a wet fish!"

Jesus H Christ on a shocking pink Harley Davidson, why is this in Cafe Society?
#33
Old 03-28-2003, 12:13 AM
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Bama
Posts: 10,747
Oh, and the Beavis and Butthead movie classic delivered by Robert Stack, "Well I'll be a monkey's bare-assed uncle!"
#34
Old 03-28-2003, 12:17 AM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Evergreen Terrace
Posts: 2,479
Hot Diggety, dagnabbit!
#35
Old 03-28-2003, 12:18 AM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Douglas, Isle of Man
Posts: 18,214
____ My Arse!

(In response to just about everything)
#36
Old 03-28-2003, 12:22 AM
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 668
Quote:
Originally posted by samarm
"Well, tie me down and spank my bottom with a wet fish!"

Jesus H Christ on a shocking pink Harley Davidson, why is this in Cafe Society?
Hmm, good question.

Well, the blurb described this board as "Our salon for art, drama, literature, movies, music -- all the artistic disciplines -- if it's about art or entertainment, it goes here". Now one could say that all of the replies prior to this one are dealing with humorous twists on literature (some of the aforementioned statements are derived from famous works). Plus its entertaining
#37
Old 03-28-2003, 07:15 AM
Guest
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Scotland
Posts: 523
Quote:
Originally posted by Lobsang
____ My Arse!

(In response to just about everything)
Or My arse in parsley - expression of deep incredulity.
#38
Old 03-28-2003, 07:31 AM
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 787
Quote:
Originally posted by Ruby
One of my favorites is, "Holy Batshit, Robin"
In a similar vein, we morphed "Holy shit, Batman!" into "Holy bat Shitman!"
#39
Old 03-28-2003, 09:29 AM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Bikini Bottom
Posts: 587
"Jumpin' Catfish!"
"Well, fuck me running!"
#40
Old 05-05-2004, 08:10 PM
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Central New Jersey
Posts: 616
I always liked The Onion's list of catchphrases that never caught on. Top on the list were:

-Fill it will krill, Gill!
-Well, I'll be a greased Jesus!
-Upholster that!
-Just call me Eight-Way Wesley

Sorry to bump a really old thread, but I was searching on Bobcat Goldthwait, and this thread came up.
#41
Old 05-05-2004, 08:50 PM
Member
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Santa Clara, CA
Posts: 11,637
From The Onion (although I doubt it would work in real life): Menstruating Christ!


Slap me silly and call me Susan!



I'm also partial to Crikey!
__________________
This post is merely corroborative detail, intended to add artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative
#42
Old 10-17-2013, 09:03 PM
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 1
Exclamation Of Distress...

When something goes wrong for a friend of mine, a stubbed toe, a dropped cell phone, a speeding ticket, etc...he shouts "Dickbanger"!
#43
Old 10-17-2013, 09:47 PM
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Durango, CO
Posts: 3,654
From my non-swearing Mormon friends:

Cheese and Rice!

Mother Bear!

Bull Shirt!


I've always marveled at some folks self control during moments of pain, terror and surprise.
#44
Old 10-17-2013, 09:51 PM
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Montreal, QC
Posts: 57,240
Well, there was this Pit thread back in 2002 or so in which the OP articulately (in screenplay form, actually) ranted about trying to buy a fridge that didn't have an ice-maker. His "What the fucking fuck?!" just about killed me, but the supporting context was a must.
#45
Old 10-17-2013, 09:59 PM
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 570
Overheard recently: "Well shit in mah mouth and call me yer sister!"
#46
Old 10-17-2013, 10:16 PM
Shouting Grasshopper
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Meridian/280
Posts: 13,281
From the movie Paul:

"You bet your hairy love-eggs!"
"Fuck-a-roo, that was the best titty-farting sleep I have ever had!"
#47
Old 10-17-2013, 11:32 PM
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,143
I have a friend who says "shitnuts!" He's the only person I've heard use this exclamation.
#48
Old 10-18-2013, 01:30 AM
Doltish Snackhound
Charter Member
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Somewhere fictional
Posts: 11,045
An irreverent former coworker of mine (a genteel late middle-aged lady with a mouth that would make a stevedore cringe) said things like "Christ on a crutch!" and "Fuck a duck!" at work.

To this day, "Fuck a duck!" is one of my go-to exclamations when something goes wrong.
#49
Old 10-18-2013, 01:37 AM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Moscow/Toronto
Posts: 15,583
"Oh, pissflaps!" is my favorite.

A few years back, I misspoke in a the middle of a sentence and accidentally coined the word "touchwarming," a portmanteau of "touching" and "heartwarming." My daughter and I use it all the time now, usually in an ironic/sarcastic sense: "Oh, X did Y for Z, out of the 'kindness of his heart'? How very touchwarming!"

I'm hoping it'll catch on....
#50
Old 10-18-2013, 03:27 AM
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: The Nekkid Pueblo
Posts: 20,543
Quote:
Originally Posted by Max Carnage View Post
Sweet Zombie Jesus! (from Futurama)

Great googly moogly (from Snickers, I think)
Sweet Zombie Jesus, indeed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Infovore View Post
An irreverent former coworker of mine (a genteel late middle-aged lady with a mouth that would make a stevedore cringe) said things like "Christ on a crutch!" and "Fuck a duck!" at work.

To this day, "Fuck a duck!" is one of my go-to exclamations when something goes wrong.
Fuck a duck and screw a pigeon. Go to Hell and get religion.
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:28 AM.

Send questions for Cecil Adams to: [email protected]

Send comments about this website to:

Terms of Use / Privacy Policy

Advertise on the Straight Dope!
(Your direct line to thousands of the smartest, hippest people on the planet, plus a few total dipsticks.)

Copyright 2018 STM Reader, LLC.

Copyright © 2017
Best Topics: glamdring vs anduril inositol cut group youtube channels compact e reader swallow broken glass radon testing scam slate vs salon part phone tough titties lead guitarists chloroform where to buy malcolm in the middle hamster ball price of cali bamboo flooring snail story training day possum or opossum which is correct my dog has fleas song where can i sell my fur coats settlers of catan 3rd edition outback curbside to go wearing long sleeves in the summer shullsburg wi gravity hill dimmer switch ceiling fan light how long to charge car battery at 2 amps how hard is it to drive a semi