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Old 09-14-2007, 10:23 AM
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Sex Poll Inspired By The Stand

In Stephen King's novel The Stand, two of the supporting evil characters, Harold and Nadine, briefly have a sexual relationship. We are given to know that (offscreen) they do everything except vaginal intercourse because Nadine is saving her virginity for Randall Flagg.
My question will, I guess, really be answerable only by male dopers.

All other things being equal, which would you prefer:
1. A Harold/Nadine-style sexual relationship with everything except vaginal intercourse?
2. A sexual relationship that had vaginal intercourse but not the "other things?"
Old 09-14-2007, 10:30 AM
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What is number one? I'll take Sex Practices for $400, Alex.
Old 09-14-2007, 10:38 AM
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Blow jobs? Anal? Numero Uno por favor.
Old 09-14-2007, 10:40 AM
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Penis-vagina intercourse is usually a very small part of any sex act.

If I wanted a sex life, I'd be happy with the first choice.
Old 09-14-2007, 10:40 AM
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As long as "everything else" included anal, number one.
Old 09-14-2007, 10:45 AM
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Vaginal intercourse is super. I've never liked getting a blowjob much, but I do like handjobs. But I'll take #2.

I'm also assuming that this isn't an emotional relationship, just a sexual relationship...

Joe
Old 09-14-2007, 10:59 AM
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I'm trying to understand why you think this question wouldn't be relevant to females.

I'm going with #1. Before I got married, that is what my sex life consisted of, and I was very happy that way for years.
Old 09-14-2007, 11:05 AM
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When I read The Stand I always pictured Wynona Rider as Nadine.

I especially loved the scene when Nadine said to him "Do you want to watch me masturbate again?".


I'm not sure how to respond to the OP. Right now, any sort of sex life would be an improvement.

It's like asking a starving man if wants steak or lobster.
Old 09-14-2007, 11:08 AM
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#1, with even a modicum of ingenuity, has a truly infinite amount of varities. #1 hands down.
Old 09-14-2007, 11:11 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zebra
When I read The Stand I always pictured Wynona Rider as Nadine.

I especially loved the scene when Nadine said to him "Do you want to watch me masturbate again?".
I must read this book.
Old 09-14-2007, 12:22 PM
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I said it was answerable by male dopers because I was thinking too much of Harold and Nadine when I wrote the question. Harold became dissatisfied with their sexual activity. Nadine, OTOH, was primarily concerned with Flagg and only "seviced" Harold to further her goals in that direction.
In retrospect, the question is answerable by both sexes.
Old 09-14-2007, 12:25 PM
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As a female, I'd go with number 2.
Old 09-14-2007, 12:31 PM
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Female, number 1. Don't get me wrong, I love vaginal intercourse, and I'm lucky enough to be one of those women wired to orgasm through it. But...how do I say this....without anything else (I'm assuming kissing, fondling, etc. are included here), then I rarely get to the state where vaginal intercourse is comfortable, much less desirable. I don't need sonnets and roses, but you do need to prime the pump a little, y'know what I'm sayin'? As far as I can tell, that's fairly true for men as well.

But with the nearly infinite variety of ways to pleasure and be pleasured, striking only vaginal intercourse wouldn't take much away.

Although I do have to note that if I was Mr. Flagg, I wouldn't really view my everything-but gal as virginal. But I haven't read the book, maybe an intact hymen was the only requirement.
Old 09-14-2007, 12:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WhyNot

Although I do have to note that if I was Mr. Flagg, I wouldn't really view my everything-but gal as virginal. But I haven't read the book, maybe an intact hymen was the only requirement.
He didn't need her mind virignal. On the contrary - he wanted her as cruel, filthy, and dirty as possible. But I gathered she was the most fertile woman ever, and she was made to bear his child. So - one sperm in the canal would be enough to get her pregnant.
Old 09-14-2007, 12:34 PM
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I would have to go with neither. I prefer my sex life to not involve vaginas at all.

Of course, being gay I'm not exactly your target demographic for this poll. (sorry, I couldn't resist jumping in to this one)
Old 09-14-2007, 12:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anaamika
He didn't need her mind virignal. On the contrary - he wanted her as cruel, filthy, and dirty as possible. But I gathered she was the most fertile woman ever, and she was made to bear his child. So - one sperm in the canal would be enough to get her pregnant.
Ah, that makes more sense.
Old 09-14-2007, 12:45 PM
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Man, that's wayy to tough.

#1 has it's perks; #2 is fantastic as well.

I'd have to put myself in the #1 camp as well.
Old 09-14-2007, 01:16 PM
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I'll go with 1a: everything but vaginal sex, and please to not be pitched off a cliff by Flagg.

Last edited by OneCentStamp; 09-14-2007 at 01:17 PM.
Old 09-14-2007, 01:28 PM
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Related poll for straight men (and anyone else who cares to answer) -- while watching porn, do you tend to skip over the fucking scenes so that you can get to more foreplay scenes?

I do.
Old 09-14-2007, 02:16 PM
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I am currently living scenario number #2, and I don't like it. We have intercourse with little foreplay (a backrub and a bit of dry humping are enough to get my wife ready for penetration). I am going mad because I want to perform cunnilingus and my wife won't let me. I would also like to get a blowjob, but she's not willing. If I could only choose one sexual act, it would be cunnilingus, so scenario #1 is my choice.
Old 09-14-2007, 02:44 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gus Gusterson
If I could only choose one sexual act, it would be cunnilingus, so scenario #1 is my choice.
Has your email inbox been swamped yet from frustrated female Dopers?
Old 09-14-2007, 03:02 PM
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I wonder if the wording of the choices is ambiguous enough to allow for a dildo/fingers/etc. loophole vis-a-vis vaginal sex. I bet that at least a few people choosing #1 are assuming that fingers and dildoes are allowed.

If the choices were between an all-embracing definition of sodomy vs. vaginal penetration and G-spot orgasms, it would be a tougher choice, especially for women.
Old 09-14-2007, 03:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zebra
When I read The Stand I always pictured Wynona Rider as Nadine.

I especially loved the scene when Nadine said to him "Do you want to watch me masturbate again?".
But in the mini-series Laura San Giacomo played Nadine. Not a bad substitute, if you as me.

I'd go with #1 for a physical-only relationship. Don't know which I would pick if it was with someone I was going to be with.
Old 09-14-2007, 03:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Scrivener
I wonder if the wording of the choices is ambiguous enough to allow for a dildo/fingers/etc. loophole vis-a-vis vaginal sex. I bet that at least a few people choosing #1 are assuming that fingers and dildoes are allowed.

If the choices were between an all-embracing definition of sodomy vs. vaginal penetration and G-spot orgasms, it would be a tougher choice, especially for women.
If we're using The Stand as our guide, it was made pretty clear that physical virginity (i.e. no penetration) was the standard. Harold was allowed to perform cunnilingus and anal sex on her, but wasn't allowed to break the seal.
Old 09-14-2007, 03:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WhyNot
Has your email inbox been swamped yet from frustrated female Dopers?
I beg to differ. Just because someone likes to do it doesn't mean they're any good.
Old 09-14-2007, 03:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anaamika
I beg to differ. Just because someone likes to do it doesn't mean they're any good.
Oh, I'm good at it.

My experience with oral sex (as a man receiving it) has been that women who like to give head are invariably good at it (some better than others, of course).
Old 09-14-2007, 03:57 PM
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I love when the smiley comes up during cunnilingus conversations.
Old 09-14-2007, 04:00 PM
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Originally Posted by KneadToKnow
I love when the smiley comes up during cunnilingus conversations.
Better than the stupid embarrassed one, which I can't code (my smileys don't work automatically on Citrix, I have to code them.)
Old 09-14-2007, 04:10 PM
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I think we're missing some context here. Harold was a virgin, he'd never had vaginal sex and came to feel that everything he did with Nadine was as worthless as a spank bank in 3D. that makes the choice a little more tricky for me.
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Old 09-14-2007, 05:15 PM
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#2.

I've hooked up with 3 women who wanted only to blow and it gets old. I stopped looking at them as desirable women, just blow jobs.

One of them didn't like to be petted even. She just wanted a cock in her mouth.
Old 09-14-2007, 06:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BarnOwl
#2.

I've hooked up with 3 women who wanted only to blow and it gets old. I stopped looking at them as desirable women, just blow jobs.

One of them didn't like to be petted even. She just wanted a cock in her mouth.
But that's not what option #1 says. Option number one is everything but vaginal intercourse. You'd have cunnilingis, petting, biting (if...you're into that), role playing, sodomy and the like.

If you were just having vaginal, wouldn't you be thinking of the woman just as a means for sex? (And I know I'm setting myself up for a joke here...)
Old 09-14-2007, 06:15 PM
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Maybe I should clarify:
1. Everything except penetration of the vagina.
2. Vaginal sex with no anal sex, oral sex, or other "exotic" practices. One would still be permitted a certain amount of foreplay. Imagine sex as Ward and June Cleaver might have had it.
Old 09-14-2007, 06:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BarnOwl
#2.
I've hooked up with 3 women who wanted only to blow and it gets old. I stopped looking at them as desirable women, just blow jobs.

One of them didn't like to be petted even. She just wanted a cock in her mouth.
My email is listed in my member profile. I'm just sayin'.....

I'd say #1. Foreplay? The feast before the beast. Kissing, cuddling, wiping my lover out with a tasty cascade of cunnilingus-induced orgasms, more kissing? Or just vaginal intercourse.

Is it me or are men who are going for #1 also men who crave going down on their women?

Sorry, variety is the spice of life.

Scumpup? Thanks. Here I was, feeling all happy and tingly.

Ward and June?

Cartooniverse
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Last edited by Cartooniverse; 09-14-2007 at 06:38 PM. Reason: Scumpup's cold shower of a post. :)
Old 09-14-2007, 07:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scumpup
Maybe I should clarify:
1. Everything except penetration of the vagina.
2. Vaginal sex with no anal sex, oral sex, or other "exotic" practices. One would still be permitted a certain amount of foreplay. Imagine sex as Ward and June Cleaver might have had it.
Well, if we're putting foreplay on the table ( clean up before dinner, please!), then I'd like to change my answer. I pretty much gave up kink when I decided to marry my husband, and I've been quite happy nonetheless.
Old 09-14-2007, 07:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scumpup
Imagine sex as Ward and June Cleaver might have had it.
Not on your life.

Eldridge and June Cleaver, maybe.
Old 09-14-2007, 09:51 PM
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My last marriage was a very limited amount of #2 only. Nothing else. Was really annoying, but then, I married a selfish sociopathic nutjob.

So if forced to chose between those polarities, I'd say #1.

Knowing full well that I'd be unhappy with that after a while too.

(Of course, re-reading the above, I have to say laugh at the first line. My marriage was full of shit, so "very limited amount of #2" is somewhat ironic.)
Old 09-14-2007, 10:14 PM
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Put me down for #1; I'm an oral sex fan (giving and receiving)!!
Old 09-15-2007, 04:40 AM
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Yeah, it makes a difference to me whether we're talking about The Handmaids Tale, or a mutually acceptable amount of foreplay. In the latter case I'm probably going for #2
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Old 09-15-2007, 06:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BarnOwl
#2.

I've hooked up with 3 women who wanted only to blow and it gets old. I stopped looking at them as desirable women, just blow jobs.

One of them didn't like to be petted even. She just wanted a cock in her mouth.
My heart goes out to you BarnOwl. I'd like to help, so please pass along the contact information of these gals.

Last edited by Leaffan; 09-15-2007 at 06:10 AM.
Old 09-15-2007, 09:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scumpup
Imagine sex as Ward and June Cleaver might have had it.
I should be picturing the missionary position, almost fully clothed, but somehow I'm pictuing Hugh Beaumont with a ball gag and leather cuffs, and Barbara Billingsley in a Gestapo uniform and stilletos, with a cat-o-nine-tails.


Thanks very much.
Old 09-15-2007, 10:10 AM
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I'm married & have 2 highly energetic kids. I get #2. #1 isn't even on the menu. BTW- you forgot #3 which is "You don't like it? Then go post on that Damn Computer and let me sleep."
Old 09-15-2007, 11:04 AM
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Originally Posted by ShibbOleth
Barbara Billingsley in a Gestapo uniform and stilletos, with a cat-o-nine-tails.
Somehow reading that post made my laptop computer get, like 2 pounds heavier, and I don't underst-- wait, never mind.
Old 09-15-2007, 11:53 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KneadToKnow
Not on your life.

Eldridge and June Cleaver, maybe.
I'm thinking that Eldridge probably wouldn't lay a finger on the white devil.
Old 09-15-2007, 12:25 PM
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It depends on whether kissing is considered a sexual act.

If it is then I choose #1.

If not then #2.
Old 09-15-2007, 01:28 PM
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I chose #2.

It's okay.
Old 09-16-2007, 12:22 AM
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What I don't understand is the people who haven't read this book yet. I thought it was as de rigeur here as "The Princess Bride" and Joss Whedon.

(It really is a good book. It isn't really like any of Stephen King's other books.)

This really is a tough question. I don't like either choice - neither would be satisfying in the long run. "Do you want chocolate cake for the rest of your life with no other desserts, or every other kind of dessert but no chocolate cake ever again?" I'm going to have to decline to choose on the grounds that I don't have to.

Last edited by Cat Whisperer; 09-16-2007 at 12:22 AM.
Old 09-16-2007, 09:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShibbOleth
I should be picturing the missionary position, almost fully clothed, but somehow I'm pictuing Hugh Beaumont with a ball gag and leather cuffs, and Barbara Billingsley in a Gestapo uniform and stilletos, with a cat-o-nine-tails.
< Insert "Ward, I think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night" joke here >
Old 09-16-2007, 09:22 PM
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Oh, yeah. Female here. This is a really really tough question. I'd have to go with #2--not because I'm a plain-vanilla type, but because I think I'd feel quite unsatisfied without good ol'fashioned fucking. Anal is totally different. Maybe it would be a reasonable substitute for a man, but for me, it wouldn't be.

But really what I'd do is dump Harold, stop saving myself for that freak Randall Flagg, and go seduce Stu Redman or something.
Old 09-17-2007, 07:17 AM
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Originally Posted by Green Bean
But really what I'd do is dump Harold, stop saving myself for that freak Randall Flagg, and go seduce Stu Redman or something.

"How's it goin', East Texas? "
Old 09-17-2007, 08:38 AM
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I've had a couple relationships that were all #1 (like in high school and college, when the girls were much more worried about getting pregnant) and one that was all #2, and I'd have to go with the #1. A man (and most women, evidently) needs variety.

And to voice an unpopular opinion, I didn't even like The Stand. I found it tedious.
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