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#1
Old 08-09-2012, 05:19 PM
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Asian Massage Parlor - Cool if Women Go?

I say this as someone who has never been to one, but know what generally goes on with them.

I have a female friend, happily married, but in recent conversations she has been somewhat interested in the same sex. Not to the point where she would cheat or have an open relationship or even engage in a sexual relationship, but she has wanted to explore her feelings.

I thought it would be a great idea to take her for a drink or two and then bring her to an Asian massage parlor. I would just sit in the lobby and let her get a sensual massage. Is this something where women would be welcome, and receive a sensual massage, or is it limited to overweight businessmen and truckers?
#2
Old 08-09-2012, 05:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TommyTutone View Post
I say this as someone who has never been to one, but know what generally goes on with them.

I have a female friend, happily married, but in recent conversations she has been somewhat interested in the same sex. Not to the point where she would cheat or have an open relationship or even engage in a sexual relationship, but she has wanted to explore her feelings.

I thought it would be a great idea to take her for a drink or two and then bring her to an Asian massage parlor. I would just sit in the lobby and let her get a sensual massage. Is this something where women would be welcome, and receive a sensual massage, or is it limited to overweight businessmen and truckers?
I know a woman who tried to buy a gift certificate from such an establishment, falsely believing that it was a legitimate massage salon. She was told through the door to go away and that it was for men only.

This is the extent of my knowledge on the subject.
#3
Old 08-09-2012, 05:35 PM
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By "sensual massage", what exactly do you mean?
#4
Old 08-09-2012, 05:48 PM
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I'm having a hard time making a connection between "Asian" and "sexual". Are there no places that offer a Thai hot stone massage or something? OP says he "knows what generally goes on in them" -- are you certain that's not your imagination getting away from you?
#5
Old 08-09-2012, 06:21 PM
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Originally Posted by leahcim View Post
I'm having a hard time making a connection between "Asian" and "sexual". Are there no places that offer a Thai hot stone massage or something? OP says he "knows what generally goes on in them" -- are you certain that's not your imagination getting away from you?
I know I'm not the most worldly guy in the world, but am I being whooshed? At many of these places, you pay up front for the massage, get rubbed down, and at the end, after they have aroused you, are willing to see the job to completion for a good tip.

http://lovepanky.com/sensual-tea...ending-massage

Sorry, no disrespect intended, I thought it was something most people knew about.

In the case of my friend, she would not be looking for a happy ending, that would be illegal anyway, but just something sensual.

Last edited by TommyTutone; 08-09-2012 at 06:22 PM.
#6
Old 08-09-2012, 06:29 PM
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I would call first and ask if they accept female clients. While there might be some parlors that are accommodating, it's not something that you can expect to be well received on a drop-in basis. Most of the masseuses aren't exactly in it for the joy of the game, and it's obnoxious enough to spend all day jerking off random men without having to figure out to do with some lady who shows up without even a good idea of what she wants. A parlor might have someone willing to take that on, but she'd probably need to be scheduled.

When I lived in China, I got massages weekly, and my favorite joint was a $1.00 massage parlor in a dark basement behind a rabbit butcher stall. I know this particular establishment offered happy endings in addition to serving regular clients. That said, I only once had anyone offer anything more than a straightforward massage, and even that amounted to no more than some strategic pressure against the table without any real contact. It's generally assumed that women are not looking for sexual services.
#7
Old 08-09-2012, 06:29 PM
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Not all massage parlors offer this illegal service. Based on the way this thread has gone so far, you'd better make sure the place is an actually one of those quasi-brothels or you're going to embarrass the hell out of some legitimate masseuse.
#8
Old 08-09-2012, 06:45 PM
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Originally Posted by Marley23 View Post
Not all massage parlors offer this illegal service. Based on the way this thread has gone so far, you'd better make sure the place is an actually one of those quasi-brothels or you're going to embarrass the hell out of some legitimate masseuse.
I would definitely find out, I get regular massages and know the difference. You bring up a good point though, if a woman is massaging a female client sensually, is it still illegal? I guess if it is considered sex for money it would be.
#9
Old 08-09-2012, 07:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TommyTutone View Post
I have a female friend, happily married, but in recent conversations she has been somewhat interested in the same sex. Not to the point where she would cheat or have an open relationship or even engage in a sexual relationship, but she has wanted to explore her feelings.

I thought it would be a great idea to take her for a drink or two and then bring her to an Asian massage parlor. I would just sit in the lobby and let her get a sensual massage. Is this something where women would be welcome, and receive a sensual massage, or is it limited to overweight businessmen and truckers?
Aside from the potential logistical problems already mentioned in this thread, I think this is a terrible idea and that your friend would probably be offended if you mentioned it to her. It's unlikely that she intended "explore her feelings" to mean "have sex with a prostitute" (especially since she said she didn't want to cheat on her husband), and if she did then she could arrange things on her own without help from you. Frankly if a male friend made such a suggestion to me I would suspect that he just wanted to watch and was trying to trick me into bringing his porn fantasies to life.
#10
Old 08-09-2012, 07:06 PM
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I'm having a hard time making the connection between "she doesn't want to cheat on her husband" and "I think she should go get a hinky quasi-legal massage."

First of all, I think you should butt WAY the fuck out of their relationship. Secondly, if she wants to explore, she needs to take the initiative to 1> decide that's want she wants, and 2> discuss with her husband in advance if and how she can do that within the bounds of their relationship agreements.

Nowhere do I see an appropriate place for you to be in the middle of this business.
#11
Old 08-09-2012, 07:09 PM
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Originally Posted by Lamia View Post
Frankly if a male friend made such a suggestion to me I would suspect that he just wanted to watch and was trying to trick me into bringing his porn fantasies to life.
That's really what it sounds like, isn't it? He's going to take her for a "drink or two" (what, a date with a married woman??) and then to a 'massage' parlour. But it's for "her" benefit (although it doesn't sound like she asked him for this). Creepy.

Last edited by Kaio; 08-09-2012 at 07:10 PM.
#12
Old 08-09-2012, 07:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaio View Post
That's really what it sounds like, isn't it? He's going to take her for a "drink or two" (what, a date with a married woman??) and then to a 'massage' parlour. But it's for "her" benefit (although it doesn't sound like she asked him for this). Creepy.
Well, she and I are close, but platonic, friends and I would not have it any other way (nor would she for that matter). We go out for drinks before without an issue. It's not something she feels comfortable talking about with her husband, but because she and I are like-minded and open, she can talk to me about, and we have talked about, which is why I asked here.

I won't lie, there would be interest in hearing the details, if she was willing to share them, but I fully expect what would go on would be private and I'm good with that too, I just was helping her explore something that we've talked about in the past.
#13
Old 08-09-2012, 07:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaio View Post
I'm having a hard time making the connection between "she doesn't want to cheat on her husband" and "I think she should go get a hinky quasi-legal massage."

First of all, I think you should butt WAY the fuck out of their relationship. Secondly, if she wants to explore, she needs to take the initiative to 1> decide that's want she wants, and 2> discuss with her husband in advance if and how she can do that within the bounds of their relationship agreements.

Nowhere do I see an appropriate place for you to be in the middle of this business.
I agree.

If the genders were reversed, i.e. a married man expresses a desire to be with other men, SDMB members would be quite harsh on him.
#14
Old 08-09-2012, 07:27 PM
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If I were your friend, I would find this extremely awkward. "Explore feelings for other women" does not mean "mess around with a prostitute". Having her quasi-lesbian experience with someone she's never met before, who is getting paid and possibly exploited, would be extremely stressful for most women. It would be better for her to bring it up with her husband and see if they can introduce a mutual friend into the equation. Even bringing home some random broad from a bar would probably feel less squicky.
#15
Old 08-09-2012, 07:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TommyTutone View Post
I won't lie, there would be interest in hearing the details, if she was willing to share them, but I fully expect what would go on would be private and I'm good with that too, I just was helping her explore something that we've talked about in the past.
Unless she explicitly asked you to assist her in finding a "happy ending" massage parlor that caters to women then she is unlikely to perceive this suggestion as "helping".
#16
Old 08-09-2012, 07:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaio View Post

First of all, I think you should butt WAY the fuck out of their relationship.
Heh - you said "butt fuck"
#17
Old 08-09-2012, 09:23 PM
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Count me in the camp of why you should link it to "Asian". Which is kinda offensive in a lot of ways.

I've had a lot of massages - PROPER ones, and a couple that I thought were "proper" but soon got the "tap tap" on what came (that I turned down with no consequences whatsoever)

What I'm wondering, more than anything else - just what makes a "sensual" massage and how you would ask for one, as opposed to the "standard" (therapeutic / relaxing) oil massage. And I'd also be wondering just what this would show / prove.

The whole thing just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
#18
Old 08-09-2012, 09:25 PM
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I see others have already chimed in but hell if even for your own safety consider treading lightly on taking a married female friend to a brothel, you might have an angry husband after you.
#19
Old 08-09-2012, 09:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lamia View Post
Aside from the potential logistical problems already mentioned in this thread, I think this is a terrible idea and that your friend would probably be offended if you mentioned it to her. It's unlikely that she intended "explore her feelings" to mean "have sex with a prostitute" (especially since she said she didn't want to cheat on her husband), and if she did then she could arrange things on her own without help from you. Frankly if a male friend made such a suggestion to me I would suspect that he just wanted to watch and was trying to trick me into bringing his porn fantasies to life.
I agree with this.

Also, I don't know what you mean by "sensual" that wouldn't be sexual. At these places, I'd guess that if she were to go, they'd offer her a regular massage and nothing more. She would have to be the one to initiate any discussion of "extras" and her demeanor and ease with the subject would probably signal to the masseuse that she was "legit".
#20
Old 08-09-2012, 10:02 PM
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Originally Posted by grude View Post
I see others have already chimed in but hell if even for your own safety consider treading lightly on taking a married female friend to a brothel, you might have an angry husband after you.
Good point about the husband, and I guess I should clarify that it would be sensual, not sexual. That is, gentle touching, oils, whatever, rather than just getting her off, and not a therapeutic massage. I will let her figure it out with him, if it's something she wants to explore badly enough, she needs to tell him and gauge his (horrified) reaction.

As for the offense of calling it Asian massage, no offense made, it's just a term that has been used for years to differentiate between sexual/sensual and therapeutic.
#21
Old 08-09-2012, 10:50 PM
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Just have her go for a 'normal' massage at a 'normal' massage parlour. Have her ask for a masseuse, not masseure. She can have fun fantasizing without getting anyone into any trouble.
#22
Old 08-09-2012, 11:14 PM
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They still have those? I remember there used to be a number of them in the town I grew up in, but they all closed. The last one I remember seeing was 22 years ago, which brings me around to your question...

My only experience with one of these places was when I was 18. I was dating a man in his 30s, and one day he was having some serious back problems. He had stated that, aside from the hushed sexual services those places provided they also could give one hell of a legit backrub, and as he was in serious pain he wanted to go. He asked if I would like to along and of course I said yes. A peep into the forbidden, and likely my only opportunity to satisfy the curiosity of exactly was behind those darkened windows? Was there any question?

When we arrived he had to knock. An older Asian lady answered and looked at me with surprise. When the bf asked about getting his back worked on she looked at me, shook her head, said "No", and shut the door. I am relatively certain we were not allowed in because I was with him.

I still wonder what was behind those darkened windows.
#23
Old 08-09-2012, 11:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TommyTutone View Post
I say this as someone who has never been to one, but know what generally goes on with them.

I have a female friend, happily married, but in recent conversations she has been somewhat interested in the same sex. Not to the point where she would cheat or have an open relationship or even engage in a sexual relationship, but she has wanted to explore her feelings.

I thought it would be a great idea to take her for a drink or two and then bring her to an Asian massage parlor. I would just sit in the lobby and let her get a sensual massage. Is this something where women would be welcome, and receive a sensual massage, or is it limited to overweight businessmen and truckers?
I assume you mean one in the US. I happen to know of establishments over here that do include women who can service women. But if you're in the US, my advice would be to discuss the matter with the manager of the place, who I'm sure would not be shocked by the situation, probably having seen it all anyway. I'm guessing, though, that the manager could be concerned about an undercover sting operation. So another possibility would be to sound out the female masseuse who is rubbing your friend down as to who on the staff might help her.

This is all assuming too that she is at a parlor that already has a shady reputation and is amenable to the idea of visiting such.
#24
Old 08-09-2012, 11:19 PM
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Originally Posted by leahcim View Post
I'm having a hard time making a connection between "Asian" and "sexual". Are there no places that offer a Thai hot stone massage or something? OP says he "knows what generally goes on in them" -- are you certain that's not your imagination getting away from you?
In his defense I distinctly remember "Asian massage" parlors being quite prevalent, and yes, there was stuff that "generally went on" in them.

As far as I know they don't exist anymore; it's been 20+ years since I've seen one. Not that I'm looking
#25
Old 08-09-2012, 11:21 PM
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What's wrong with a good old fashioned strip club lap dance? Those girls love female customers.

But also, this whole thing is weird and disrespectful towards her relationship with her husband. That's her business but you're sleazy for enabling her in this.
#26
Old 08-09-2012, 11:24 PM
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Could she take her husband along? I know of at least one place that advertises an "erotic couples massage," which is basically a foursome.

Last edited by Siam Sam; 08-09-2012 at 11:24 PM.
#27
Old 08-09-2012, 11:27 PM
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I can think of nothing whatsoever that could go wrong with this plan and I urge you to try it as soon as possible.
#28
Old 08-09-2012, 11:35 PM
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Has any guy on this board ever posted a "sexual" OP that wasn't full-on creepy? Christ.
#29
Old 08-10-2012, 12:02 AM
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As an interesting anecdote: I actually went to one of these "massage" parlors about ten years ago with a buddy of mine. We were both shitfaced drunk when we got the idea (Flint is notorious for such parlors) to try one out late one night.

It was not too long after I had been first paralyzed, so I was still rather new to my wheelchair (it hadn't even been two years at that point; hence the drinking). We get there and get taken to seperate rooms; my buddy with one girl, me with another. "Girls" probably wasn't the appropriate title for the "masseuses", as both of our ladies were pushing 40.

Anyway, I get situated on the table in my room and look at the asian woman standing there with me. She was very demure; mumbling something incoherent to me and nervously flitting about here and there. I asked her how much. She made an "Ahh" sound and turned her back to me. A second later I hear crying sounds and see her body trembling.

I sat there, shirt half unbuttoned, as this asian-masseuse lady broke down in tears in front of me; sobbing about her son who was in a wheelchair. Buzzkill!! She didn't speak English very well, so I couldn't make out all her words but I got the impression that this son was "back home" in her native country and she was unable to be with him. And she was not recovered from whatever it was that caused her son to need the chair.

But I was TOTALLY weirded the fuck out. And drunk. And had just wanted a little "erotic massage" from the asian massage parlors of legend of Flinttown (it seemed like such a great idea at the drunken time). I left the room and just waited for my buddy to come out. It seemed like forever. All I remember is he came out with a stupid smile on his face. Psshht. I sure didn't.
#30
Old 08-10-2012, 09:16 AM
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If she's happily married (as you say), she should be having the conversation with her husband, and you should tell her so.
#31
Old 08-10-2012, 11:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TommyTutone View Post
I know I'm not the most worldly guy in the world, but am I being whooshed? At many of these places, you pay up front for the massage, get rubbed down, and at the end, after they have aroused you, are willing to see the job to completion for a good tip.
I was aware of the "service" -- just not that it was particularly related to "Asian" massage parlors to the point where if a place was Asian themed you could just assume that that service would be available.

I used to live very near to a very-Japanese-themed spa/massage/hottub place that was totally on the up-and-up. There were places that were rumored to provide "additional services", but those ones weren't particularly themed in any way or other.
#32
Old 08-10-2012, 12:49 PM
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Originally Posted by corkboard View Post
If she's happily married (as you say), she should be having the conversation with her husband, and you should tell her so.
Word.
#33
Old 08-10-2012, 12:56 PM
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Missed the edit...

And this too:

Quote:
Originally Posted by listedmia View Post
If I were your friend, I would find this extremely awkward. "Explore feelings for other women" does not mean "mess around with a prostitute".
If I were lamenting my inability to find a girlfriend and you offered to help me find a prostitute, you'd get an earful about how I'm not your animate sex toy to live out your "can I watch" fantasies. And unless you had a damn good excuse for being so rude, I'd probably never speak to you again. Such an offer makes it rather clear how little you respect her.

Last edited by Kaio; 08-10-2012 at 12:58 PM.
#34
Old 08-10-2012, 01:13 PM
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I can't even begin to express how creepy this idea is. For everyone involved, with the possible exception of the clueless OP.
#35
Old 08-10-2012, 01:33 PM
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See why these establishments only cater to men? Women tend to get really uppity about this kind of thing.
#36
Old 08-10-2012, 01:58 PM
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Originally Posted by Curiosity Kills Her View Post
In his defense I distinctly remember "Asian massage" parlors being quite prevalent, and yes, there was stuff that "generally went on" in them.
Yeah, I've seen a few of them around here with signs advertising "Asian massage," presumably staffed by Asians. I'll have to drop in and inform them how offensive they're being to the PC white community.
#37
Old 08-10-2012, 02:11 PM
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Originally Posted by Emiliana View Post
I can't even begin to express how creepy this idea is. For everyone involved, with the possible exception of the clueless OP.
Count me as one who does not find it creepy. There was a time I would have enjoyed such friendly help...
#38
Old 08-10-2012, 02:48 PM
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I live in Manhattan. I would not have thought it to be provincial or prudish or uninterested in sex. Possibly more policed in such matters than some other venues? At any rate, I've gone for massages at many many many different places, mostly Asian, usually advertised as "Qi Gong Tui Na" or "Noble Tui Na" or just "massage" or in one prominent establishment "THE BEST BACK RUB FOR MEN / WOMEN". None of them was a place where sexual favors were dispensed. Either that or I put off cop vibes or puritanical preacher vibes or something? (seems unlikely, doesn't it?). Just totally legal nonerotic deep tissue elbows-into-your-tight-muscles hot rocks stretchings and etc legitimate massages.

Hmm, OK, one exception. One time, one person, at a place I'd been to before where nothing of that ilk had prevously happened. I'm guessing it wasn't with the knowledge or encouragement of the management since I never saw her again. (she did delicately gentle nudgy 'accidental' things to get me aroused, albeit while still at least minimally clothed, then asked if I'd like to opt for more minutes).
#39
Old 08-10-2012, 03:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TommyTutone View Post
I say this as someone who has never been to one, but know what generally goes on with them.

I have a female friend, happily married, but in recent conversations she has been somewhat interested in the same sex. Not to the point where she would cheat or have an open relationship or even engage in a sexual relationship, but she has wanted to explore her feelings.

I thought it would be a great idea to take her for a drink or two and then bring her to an Asian massage parlor. I would just sit in the lobby and let her get a sensual massage. Is this something where women would be welcome, and receive a sensual massage, or is it limited to overweight businessmen and truckers?
Why doesn't "your friend" just tell her husband that she wants to try making out with other chicks and see what he thinks of it? Somehow I suspect the idea isn't *that* repulsive/frightening to ye average man.

With that out of the way why does it have to be an "Asian massage palor"? Are there no other venues where girls who are into other girls meet up?
#40
Old 07-12-2017, 07:39 AM
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Zombie or no zombie, I wonder if the OP's friend is still married to her man 5 years later.
#41
Old 07-12-2017, 08:21 AM
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Originally Posted by AK84 View Post
Zombie or no zombie, I wonder if the OP's friend is still married to her man 5 years later.
You're asking if their relationship had a happy ending?

Regards,
Shodan
#42
Old 07-12-2017, 08:54 AM
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Moderator Note

And on that note...thread closed.
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