View Poll Results: Would you be okay with your teens doing drugs if they paid for it fully with a part time job?
No. Absolutely not. 37 84.09%
Maybe but it would be limited to soft drugs as opposed to hard drugs 7 15.91%
I would be fine with it so long as they had a job 0 0%
Indifferent to it 0 0%
Voters: 44. You may not vote on this poll

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#1
Old 12-30-2017, 03:07 AM
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Would you be okay with your teens doing drugs if they paid for the habit fully with a part job?

And could hypothetically function normally as to not interrupt their studies and work?

I'm 20 and got a job in December before I left for holidays. My extreme anti-drug parents said that so long as I don't steal and assault them or others for drug money, get good grades in my university, and use common sense, I can hang out with my "reasonable" classmates that do softish drugs. (Strickly no injecting things though says mother).

Some have said to me in my uni that this is f*cking insane and I either must be lying or have completely relaxed parents, some are indifferent, and others are understanding.

Where would you lie on this scale?

Last edited by rastafarian; 12-30-2017 at 03:08 AM.
#2
Old 12-30-2017, 03:32 AM
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lots of things i think or am curious about -

i would wonder how or why this would this come up.

i would argue that they aren't extreme anti-drug, because if they were they wouldn't allow it no matter what you did.

i would say that a mother having a conversation about how you did drugs ("no injecting things") would be a strange conversation.

i would wonder if you're away at school how they'd know what you were doing anyway.

i would wonder how the hell they would plan to police who you hang out with.

i would wonder why they think you'd listen.

i would wonder what your & their life consisted of the previous 19 years that they didn't actually impart, or try to, their feelings & thoughts into you that they felt the need to try & do so now, from under different roofs no less.

i would wonder what the purpose of you asking our opinion was.

i would think you're lying basically.
#3
Old 12-30-2017, 04:16 AM
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Not no but hell no. My family has a rather extreme history of drug and alcohol abuse combined with successful suicides. I have already coached my daughters against it. I hope they never take a drink in their lives although they probably will and there is not much I can do about it except tell them the risks. Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do.

Marijuana may not be considered to be that bad in general but I had a recent girlfriend that screwed up her life over it as well. She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit as a late teenager and that still causes serious issues with her family even though she is now in her mid-30's.

Nancy Reagan was right. Say no to drugs. I am not a Puritan myself especially when it comes to alcohol but they aren't something you want to play with. Things like opiate addictions take down the careers of successful people and kill many more just because the way that the rapidly built up addiction works. You may think it won't happen to you but it probably will if you do it enough times. There is no one that is immune to becoming addicted strongly to many different types of drugs and you will lose control over your life when that happens.

This isn't a scare message. I am speaking from experience both academically and personally. Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't).

Last edited by Shagnasty; 12-30-2017 at 04:17 AM.
#4
Old 12-30-2017, 05:01 AM
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I was OK with my 16 year old smoking marijuana, even in her bedroom. She paid for it with her own part time job money.

I basically said "I can't stop you from smoking it. Just be careful, and don't overdo it."

She's 20 now and is a good kid with a decent job.

When I was about 18 my parents found a gram of hash in my coat. We had a similar conversation and they didn't even confiscate it. I probably smoke the odd puff about 3 or 4 times a year at this point.

I think that's better than freaking out about it, like my ex did.
#5
Old 12-30-2017, 05:07 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shagnasty View Post
Not no but hell no. My family has a rather extreme history of drug and alcohol abuse combined with successful suicides. I have already coached my daughters against it. I hope they never take a drink in their lives although they probably will and there is not much I can do about it except tell them the risks. Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do.

Marijuana may not be considered to be that bad in general but I had a recent girlfriend that screwed up her life over it as well. She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit as a late teenager and that still causes serious issues with her family even though she is now in her mid-30's.

Nancy Reagan was right. Say no to drugs. I am not a Puritan myself especially when it comes to alcohol but they aren't something you want to play with. Things like opiate addictions take down the careers of successful people and kill many more just because the way that the rapidly built up addiction works. You may think it won't happen to you but it probably will if you do it enough times. There is no one that is immune to becoming addicted strongly to many different types of drugs and you will lose control over your life when that happens.

This isn't a scare message. I am speaking from experience both academically and personally. Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't).
So you're basically rephrasing "marijuana is a gateway drug", then?
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#6
Old 12-30-2017, 06:23 AM
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The bottom line is that the drugs the OP is talking about are presumably illegal. So even if you discount the physical and mental risks, there's the risk of getting arrested and imprisoned. I wouldn't approve of my child taking that unnecessary risk.
#7
Old 12-30-2017, 07:14 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shagnasty View Post
Not no but hell no. My family has a rather extreme history of drug and alcohol abuse combined with successful suicides. I have already coached my daughters against it. I hope they never take a drink in their lives although they probably will and there is not much I can do about it except tell them the risks. Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do.

Marijuana may not be considered to be that bad in general but I had a recent girlfriend that screwed up her life over it as well. She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit as a late teenager and that still causes serious issues with her family even though she is now in her mid-30's.

Nancy Reagan was right. Say no to drugs. I am not a Puritan myself especially when it comes to alcohol but they aren't something you want to play with. Things like opiate addictions take down the careers of successful people and kill many more just because the way that the rapidly built up addiction works. You may think it won't happen to you but it probably will if you do it enough times. There is no one that is immune to becoming addicted strongly to many different types of drugs and you will lose control over your life when that happens.

This isn't a scare message. I am speaking from experience both academically and personally. Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't).
"Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do."

Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't)."

really consistent viewpoints there.


"She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit"

what she did was sell pot to friends & get hers free or cheaper because she got the discount that comes from a larger quantity purchase.

there was no "had to start dealing to support her own habit". pot isn't similar to heroin, stop acting like it is.


"Nancy Reagan was right"

Nancy Reagan? the let's put the "war on drugs" into overdrive Nancy Reagan? yeah, she was a real gem.

Last edited by mr horsepower; 12-30-2017 at 07:15 AM.
#8
Old 12-30-2017, 08:18 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rastafarian View Post
And could hypothetically function normally as to not interrupt their studies and work?

I'm 20 and got a job in December before I left for holidays. My extreme anti-drug parents said that so long as I don't steal and assault them or others for drug money, get good grades in my university, and use common sense, I can hang out with my "reasonable" classmates that do softish drugs. (Strickly no injecting things though says mother).

Some have said to me in my uni that this is f*cking insane and I either must be lying or have completely relaxed parents, some are indifferent, and others are understanding.

Where would you lie on this scale?
I would say no. There are two reasons, neither of which have anything to do with whether the use of recreational drugs is "wrong" or "right".

1) The human brain in most cases is not fully mature until around 25 years of age. Using recreational drugs before than can reduce full brain functioning since the brain is still maturing.

2) Unless you are a chemistry major, and can test the drugs, you never know what you are getting. Marijuana is more likely to be OK, but if you are talking about any pill form or powder form drug, you really have no idea. Wait until 25 to roll the dice.

Last edited by FreedomRider; 12-30-2017 at 08:20 AM.
#9
Old 12-30-2017, 08:53 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rastafarian View Post
I'm 20 and got a job in December before I left for holidays. My extreme anti-drug parents said that so long as I don't steal and assault them or others for drug money, get good grades in my university, and use common sense, I can hang out with my "reasonable" classmates that do softish drugs. (Strickly no injecting things though says mother).

Some have said to me in my uni that this is f*cking insane and I either must be lying or have completely relaxed parents, some are indifferent, and others are understanding.

Where would you lie on this scale?
I have daughters in their 20's. Part of my job was to prepare them to make these decisions on their own, to be able to navigate the world when I'm not there. So it might seem like you've been given permission to do softish drugs, but I'm seeing it as acknowledging that you're 20 and therefore an adult, you are going to do your own thing, and you'll probably be fine as long as it's reasonable and limited. Pretty sure they're hoping you won't make a habit out of it.

I'm of the opinion that there are no guaranteed harmless drugs, and my kids know that.
#10
Old 12-30-2017, 09:13 AM
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Would I be ok with my teenaged children doing drugs if they paid for it with money they earned on their own and it didn't interfere with normal interaction with the world? No, I would not. Speaking from experience, having tried cocaine once, and really really liking marijuana and LSD and 'shrooms in my own teen years I can tell you it WILL interfere with how your brain functions and how you interact with the world.

Take math as an example. Before I started smoking weed (I started at around age 12, was a serious dope smoker by 13), math was moderately easy for me. I had to do the work, but it wasn't difficult to master, but after I started smoking weed, math suddenly got much harder and I have never regained the ease I used to have with numbers.

Is my teenaged child over the age of 18, living in their own home paying their bills with their own money that they earn from a job? No I'm not going to like it and yes I will probably speak my mind about once, but if they are fully independent, they are fully independent. Their house, their rules, no matter how much I don't like it.
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#11
Old 12-30-2017, 09:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mr horsepower View Post
"Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do."

Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't)."

really consistent viewpoints there.


"She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit"

what she did was sell pot to friends & get hers free or cheaper because she got the discount that comes from a larger quantity purchase.

there was no "had to start dealing to support her own habit". pot isn't similar to heroin, stop acting like it is.


"Nancy Reagan was right"

Nancy Reagan? the let's put the "war on drugs" into overdrive Nancy Reagan? yeah, she was a real gem.
Nitpicking his post doesn't negate the message, which is spot on. I'm also the parent of an opioid and alcohol addict, with a long and dismal history of alcohol abuse in my family going way back. It's a scourge that is basically impossible to stop. Hope that you never have to learn about it first-hand.
#12
Old 12-30-2017, 09:19 AM
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Nope, not ok at all. And I can't imagine why anyone would do something that messes up their brain. I don't smoke, drink or do drugs. I like my brain to be fully functioning.

Last edited by Desert Nomad; 12-30-2017 at 09:19 AM.
#13
Old 12-30-2017, 09:27 AM
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Once they're in college and away from home, I assume they'll come across and try pot and soft drugs. I still have about 15 years before I have to start worrying about this. I will hope that my wife and I will have instilled a proper sense of values by then that they're able to make their own responsible decisions. I don't particularly mind or care if they're casual users and otherwise fine.

Now, before then, while in my house? Absolutely not.
#14
Old 12-30-2017, 10:05 AM
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Would you be okay with your teens doing drugs if they paid for the habit fully with a part job?

Sure. That's how I did it when I was a teenager.
#15
Old 12-30-2017, 10:15 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Desert Nomad View Post
Nope, not ok at all. And I can't imagine why anyone would do something that messes up their brain. I don't smoke, drink or do drugs. I like my brain to be fully functioning.
The urge to use mind altering substances goes all the way back to primitive man. In fact there is a theory that certain plants evolved psychedelic characteristics as they had a symbiotic relationship with animals and humans. So it's not hard to imagine that some people will be more likely to be drawn to that experience than others, this is wired into us. Some people are completely rational and reason out every decision, but not everyone's brain works like that.

Recreational drug/alcohol use is somewhat analogous to people that engage in very dangerous pursuits for the "fun of it"; whether it's cliff diving or bungee jumping or performing pull-ups without a parachute on the top of a skyscraper. Sure would not be my choice, since dying in such pursuits is just as irresponsible as a death from an overdose, but I do understand why some people are drawn to these things.

Last edited by FreedomRider; 12-30-2017 at 10:15 AM.
#16
Old 12-30-2017, 11:10 AM
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Originally Posted by FreedomRider View Post
The urge to use mind altering substances goes all the way back to primitive man. In fact there is a theory that certain plants evolved psychedelic characteristics as they had a symbiotic relationship with animals and humans.
that "theory" was come up with by a guy (Terence McKenna) who spend a lot of time tripping out of his gourd and advocating the use of hallucinogens and said "theory" is little more than "well, there's no other reason I can think of for these plants/fungi to develop such substances."

not exactly an impartial source.

I mean, tobacco plants develop nicotine as a built-in insecticide. By his "theory" they develop it to get us hooked on it.

Last edited by jz78817; 12-30-2017 at 11:12 AM.
#17
Old 12-30-2017, 11:21 AM
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I would prefer they didn't. Even if it were just marijuana and even if we lived someplace where it was legal, my feeling is that their time would be better spent on doing something other than getting high.
#18
Old 12-30-2017, 11:29 AM
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No, because my son who didn't steal or assault anyone or let anything interfere with his studies or work, and who paid for it with his own money, and who only hung out with "reasonable" classmates and was only doing softish drugs fucked up on the common sense part and decided he could drive while stoned. While he didn't get in an accident, he did get lost on the way home from his friend's house and took more than 45 minutes for a drive that should have taken less than 10.

I don't endorse anything that's pretty much guaranteed to lead you into doing something stupid, and that includes getting either drunk or high.
#19
Old 12-30-2017, 11:34 AM
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You're 20. You're an adult. I don't see how your parents can forbid you to do anything. They might not like it, but they're powerless to do anything.
#20
Old 12-30-2017, 11:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shagnasty View Post
Not no but hell no. My family has a rather extreme history of drug and alcohol abuse combined with successful suicides. I have already coached my daughters against it. I hope they never take a drink in their lives although they probably will and there is not much I can do about it except tell them the risks. Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do.

Marijuana may not be considered to be that bad in general but I had a recent girlfriend that screwed up her life over it as well. She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit as a late teenager and that still causes serious issues with her family even though she is now in her mid-30's.

Nancy Reagan was right. Say no to drugs. I am not a Puritan myself especially when it comes to alcohol but they aren't something you want to play with. Things like opiate addictions take down the careers of successful people and kill many more just because the way that the rapidly built up addiction works. You may think it won't happen to you but it probably will if you do it enough times. There is no one that is immune to becoming addicted strongly to many different types of drugs and you will lose control over your life when that happens.

This isn't a scare message. I am speaking from experience both academically and personally. Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't).
Drugs are bad, mmkay?
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#21
Old 12-30-2017, 11:39 AM
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No. Health/medical concerns. Even if legal. Even if money is a non-issue.
#22
Old 12-30-2017, 12:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rastafarian View Post
And could hypothetically function normally as to not interrupt their studies and work?

I'm 20 and got a job in December before I left for holidays. My extreme anti-drug parents said that so long as I don't steal and assault them or others for drug money, get good grades in my university, and use common sense, I can hang out with my "reasonable" classmates that do softish drugs. (Strickly no injecting things though says mother).

Some have said to me in my uni that this is f*cking insane and I either must be lying or have completely relaxed parents, some are indifferent, and others are understanding.

Where would you lie on this scale?
No kids, but nieces, some of whom have gotten a bit mixed up in drugs.

I was around it a bit in my high school years, but coming from a very anti-drug background, I never really tried it until I was out from under my parents' thumb and started questioning everything that they told me.

I have two concerns about drug use in teens/early twenties.

The first is that it is fun. It is addictive in the way that anything enjoyable is addictive. Even if there is no physical addiction, you still have the opportunity cost of your time and money going into drugs rather than something more productive. In moderation, this may not be a problem, but drugs ar one of those things that some people struggle to do in moderation.

The second is legal consequences. I had friends that were not able to get student loans of financing, because they had a drug charge on their record. They also had quite a bit of difficulty renting an apartment. The drug charge itself is usually not that severe, rarely will you spend time in jail over mere possession, but it can still really mess up your life.
#23
Old 12-30-2017, 12:36 PM
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Oh, hell no I would not like it or be happy about it. I know, however that I can make sure my teenage daughter is knowledgeable about whats out there. The bottom line though, is that shes going to make her own decisions especially as she gets older, shes 16 now. In a few years I really wont get to have too much influence. Shes a smart kid, so I hope she continues to make smart choices. That said, I will always frown upon drug use.
#24
Old 12-30-2017, 01:37 PM
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Absolutely no. Not with the addiction problem in our family. I feel like if you dont feel well enough to not do drugs on a regular basis, perhaps you need a doctor, not a dealer. The cherry on top is my cousin, whose parents clearly condoned his drug use, dead as hell last week with heroin and coke in his system. Yeah, Im still mad as fuck about it.
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#25
Old 12-30-2017, 02:05 PM
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Originally Posted by kunilou View Post
No, because my son who didn't steal or assault anyone or let anything interfere with his studies or work, and who paid for it with his own money, and who only hung out with "reasonable" classmates and was only doing softish drugs fucked up on the common sense part and decided he could drive while stoned. While he didn't get in an accident, he did get lost on the way home from his friend's house and took more than 45 minutes for a drive that should have taken less than 10.

I don't endorse anything that's pretty much guaranteed to lead you into doing something stupid, and that includes getting either drunk or high.

your son, a late teens - early 20's kid whose employed & also enrolled in school & doing well, hangs out with some friends, presumably smokes a little pot & ends up arriving home 30 minutes later than you planned?

holy shit! man ohh man, I'm hoping the intervention you surely scheduled went well, cause he was way out of line.

much later than that I'd expect his bags to be packed & out front.

i can't fathom a kid wanting to hang out with his much less uptight, same age buddies & maybe play some video games or chill with some females or something similar versus rush home to meet up with his drill sargent.
#26
Old 12-30-2017, 02:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mr horsepower View Post
i would wonder what the purpose of you asking our opinion was.

i would think you're lying basically.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mr horsepower View Post
"Harder drugs are going to land them straight in extended rehab and they know that. That is what responsible parents do."

Rehab is no fun and not worth it even if it works at all (it usually doesn't)."

really consistent viewpoints there.


"She smoked so much every day that she had to start dealing to support her own habit"

what she did was sell pot to friends & get hers free or cheaper because she got the discount that comes from a larger quantity purchase.

there was no "had to start dealing to support her own habit". pot isn't similar to heroin, stop acting like it is.


"Nancy Reagan was right"

Nancy Reagan? the let's put the "war on drugs" into overdrive Nancy Reagan? yeah, she was a real gem.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mr horsepower View Post
your son, a late teens - early 20's kid whose employed & also enrolled in school & doing well, hangs out with some friends, presumably smokes a little pot & ends up arriving home 30 minutes later than you planned?

holy shit! man ohh man, I'm hoping the intervention you surely scheduled went well, cause he was way out of line.

much later than that I'd expect his bags to be packed & out front.

i can't fathom a kid wanting to hang out with his much less uptight, same age buddies & maybe play some video games or chill with some females or something similar versus rush home to meet up with his drill sargent.
You're receiving a warning for being a jerk. You can, I presume, make your feelings on the subject of the OP known without attacking the thread and/or everyone you choose to address in it. If you can't, you shouldn't return to this one.
#27
Old 12-30-2017, 02:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rastafarian View Post
And could hypothetically function normally as to not interrupt their studies and work?

I'm 20 and got a job in December before I left for holidays. My extreme anti-drug parents said that so long as I don't steal and assault them or others for drug money, get good grades in my university, and use common sense, I can hang out with my "reasonable" classmates that do softish drugs. (Strickly no injecting things though says mother).

Some have said to me in my uni that this is f*cking insane and I either must be lying or have completely relaxed parents, some are indifferent, and others are understanding.
I went through university not too long ago. Not only did I never do drugs, I almost never saw it. Almost certainly some people were relaxing with marijuana, or abusing prescription medication, or even abusing harder drugs, but I felt no pressure at all to consume any drug other than caffeine or alcohol.

Quote:
Where would you lie on this scale?
They don't sound extremely anti-drug. They just sound controlling. They gave you a bunch of conditions, but... you're an adult. Your parents can't control what you do or who you hang out with (although if they're paying for your schooling, in practice they do have a lot of control).

Having said that, their request sounds more than reasonable, especially the part about avoiding injections (who wants an infection?). I would still avoid even the "softer" drugs. It's not like you can prove those shrooms, ecstasy, or what not are pure and certified by the FDA or national equivalent rather than being mixed with something else or even consist of some other substance entirely. (Are those really E pills?)

I've read well-researched horror stories about ecstasy in particular, and twice saw people who had "overdosed" on it (not to the point of being in medical danger, but obviously not acting right).

Last edited by Kimera757; 12-30-2017 at 03:01 PM.
#28
Old 12-30-2017, 04:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rastafarian View Post
And could hypothetically function normally as to not interrupt their studies and work?

I'm 20 and got a job in December before I left for holidays. My extreme anti-drug parents said that so long as I don't steal and assault them or others for drug money, get good grades in my university, and use common sense, I can hang out with my "reasonable" classmates that do softish drugs. (Strickly no injecting things though says mother).

Some have said to me in my uni that this is f*cking insane and I either must be lying or have completely relaxed parents, some are indifferent, and others are understanding.

Where would you lie on this scale?
I would tell you that you are an idiot if you do drugs of any kind. Period.
#29
Old 12-30-2017, 05:05 PM
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I never understood the desire to do drugs of any kind (or to get drunk, for that matter.) I don't get the appeal - even if it was completely legal, I wouldn't want to indulge, and I'd hate it if my daughter wanted to smoke or snort or whatever else one does with drugs.

Just this past summer, one of my cousins OD'd and died - everyone thought she was getting clean, and then she was dead. I just don't get it.
#30
Old 12-30-2017, 05:18 PM
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I would never be okay with any of my children using drugs, with the lone exception probably being medicinal marijuana for severe pain.
#31
Old 12-30-2017, 05:22 PM
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Originally Posted by cochrane View Post
You're 20. You're an adult. I don't see how your parents can forbid you to do anything. They might not like it, but they're powerless to do anything.
if he's living with them they can give him the boot.
#32
Old 12-30-2017, 05:35 PM
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I would prefer my children not use recreational drugs. Especially addictive ones (including booze) because there are addiction problems in the family, and there's a strong genetic component to drug addiction.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rastafarian View Post
And could hypothetically function normally as to not interrupt their studies and work?
...
That being said, if my kids spend their own money on the drugs, don't get in any trouble to do so, and it doesn't interfere with their studies or other important functioning, how would I even know?

My son does drink more than I'd like, but so far he has been very responsible about it, and that is legal. So, you know, I accept it. He's an adult, he gets to decide these things.
#33
Old 12-30-2017, 05:48 PM
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Originally Posted by k9bfriender View Post
No kids, but nieces, some of whom have gotten a bit mixed up in drugs.

The second is legal consequences. I had friends that were not able to get student loans of financing, because they had a drug charge on their record. They also had quite a bit of difficulty renting an apartment. The drug charge itself is usually not that severe, rarely will you spend time in jail over mere possession, but it can still really mess up your life.
Wow. would you mind me asking what drugs they were charged for? Were they the buyers or dealers?
#34
Old 12-30-2017, 05:48 PM
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Posts: 23,132
Quote:
Originally Posted by mr horsepower View Post
your son, a late teens - early 20's kid whose employed & also enrolled in school & doing well, hangs out with some friends, presumably smokes a little pot & ends up arriving home 30 minutes later than you planned?

holy shit! man ohh man, I'm hoping the intervention you surely scheduled went well, cause he was way out of line.

much later than that I'd expect his bags to be packed & out front.

i can't fathom a kid wanting to hang out with his much less uptight, same age buddies & maybe play some video games or chill with some females or something similar versus rush home to meet up with his drill sargent.
Yeah, he WAS way out of line because he drove while stoned. And he didn't arrive 30 minutes later than I planned, he arrived 30 minutes later because he drove around stoned for 30 minutes and couldn't remember his way home.

Sarcasm works a lot better when you know what you're mocking.
#35
Old 12-30-2017, 07:31 PM
The Central Scrutinizer
Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Pork Roll/Taylor Ham
Posts: 23,909
Quote:
Originally Posted by cochrane View Post
You're 20. You're an adult. I don't see how your parents can forbid you to do anything. They might not like it, but they're powerless to do anything.
Not seeing their names on the mortgage and Im not seeing and money to help pay for that mortgage. Not that I have anything to worry about since my daughters saw how drugs (starting with marijuana then getting worse and worse) ruined the life of their half-brother.
#36
Old 12-30-2017, 08:22 PM
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 177
Wow. Those "60s" are sure gone.
#37
Old 12-30-2017, 08:29 PM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 19,308
Depends on the drugs. Drugs can be dangerous.

If it were dissociatives, hallucinogens or marijuana I'd probably be ok with it. But amphetamines, benzos or opiates would concern me whether it was paid for by them or not.
__________________
Sometimes I doubt your commitment to sparkle motion
#38
Old 12-30-2017, 08:37 PM
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 19,308
Quote:
Originally Posted by FairyChatMom View Post
I never understood the desire to do drugs of any kind (or to get drunk, for that matter.) I don't get the appeal - even if it was completely legal, I wouldn't want to indulge, and I'd hate it if my daughter wanted to smoke or snort or whatever else one does with drugs.

Just this past summer, one of my cousins OD'd and died - everyone thought she was getting clean, and then she was dead. I just don't get it.
Drugs help manage negative psychological experiences like loneliness, boredom and psychological pain. Also when they become physically addictive, you start having to take them to avoid the physical discomfort of withdrawal.

Thats drug use in a nutshell.

There are positive aspects to drugs though. Some can be used in social settings (alcohol, amphetamines, etc) to enhance social interactions. Some can be used to break through psychological limitations (hallucinogens or DMT are used for this).

But for the most part, drugs are used to manage and avoid negative mental experiences and try to replace them with positive ones. Of course thats obvious, but thats why they're so popular. A lot of people are bored or in psychic pain.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=AnZh1fgk8wk

https://youtube.com/watch?v=YPNz372_pIQ
__________________
Sometimes I doubt your commitment to sparkle motion
#39
Old 12-30-2017, 09:18 PM
born to be shunned
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Southwestern PA
Posts: 12,635
No biological children but -------- no.
#40
Old 12-30-2017, 09:25 PM
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 2,006
Where is 20 a teen?
#41
Old 12-30-2017, 11:31 PM
Guest
Join Date: May 2016
Location: 2 hours from somewhere
Posts: 407
I was able to see many college acquaintances do stupid things while drunk. I would not want anyone I love to ingest substances that make them stupid.

Medicinal marijuana is acceptable if no other treatments will work. If you must ingest substances to have a good time, you need some other kind of help.
#42
Old 12-30-2017, 11:32 PM
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: The Nekkid Pueblo
Posts: 20,101
Quote:
Originally Posted by jz78817 View Post
if he's living with them they can give him the boot.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loach View Post
Not seeing their names on the mortgage and Im not seeing and money to help pay for that mortgage. Not that I have anything to worry about since my daughters saw how drugs (starting with marijuana then getting worse and worse) ruined the life of their half-brother.
I assumed from the OP that rastafarian is living on campus and paying his own expenses. If he's living at home and/or his parents are paying his tuition, then they can, quite rightly, either tell him to cut out the drugs, or cut him off and tell him to leave. Either way, they don't seem to have a problem with it.

I do agree that if your child lives with you, then "my house, my rules" does apply. And I agree, it's normal to be concerned if your child does drugs, whether they live with you or not.
#43
Old 12-30-2017, 11:59 PM
Knocking it up a notch. BAM!
Charter Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 16,870
I voted ''No, absolutely not.''

For one thing, there doesn't seem to be any meaningful definition of ''soft drugs'' when it comes to drug use and developing brains. There is solid evidence that even marijuana use harms brain development in teens.
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